Hello Reddit, I hope you are doing well. I really want your opinion on this because my husband is furious and I feel bad for embarrassing him.
Long story short, my husband proposed with a very beautiful 3ct ring that totally swept me off my feet. We got married 6 months ago and have been together for 7 years, through college.
When we’d discussed rings in the past we both agreed that we wanted a natural diamond even if it was smaller. After he proposed he was telling me about the ring and said it was a real diamond, he bought the diamond and then customized the band, etc.
I was so taken aback by this I googled similar rings and they were going for $20-30k. My husband works very hot and makes good money but this is a lot, especially when we both have home ownership goals, student loans to pay, etc.
Fast forward to today, hubby and I are happy newlyweds. I’m out with my girls and one of my friends says “is it real?” talking about my ring and my friends kind of said they couldn’t believe it was real because it was so big.
I told them my hubby told me it was real and they dropped it all in good fun, but it got me thinking. I went to a jewelry store to have it looked at and the jeweler said it was definitely a lab diamond.
Just to clarify, I would’ve said yes if my husband proposed with a ring pop. I felt like he got a bigger ring than he could afford so he got a lab diamond and lied to me to impress my family/his friends/etc.
I was super upset and confronted him about it and he owned up to lying and said he just wanted the best for me and he always wanted to replace it with a real diamond one day. Honestly, he was very sweet and I totally forgave him.
Later on, casually in conversation, I let slip to my mom, one of her friends, and one of my girlfriends about the ring being a lab diamond and hubby lying. They lit into him and I had to tell them to relax.
Fast forward, hubby finds out and he is furious. He says I embarrassed him and should have kept it to myself. I stood up for myself and told him I didn’t think that was fair because by lying to me he lied to them too because obviously they asked me and I told them it was a natural diamond.
Now, he is super upset, I feel bad, and things in general are no bueno. Am I the bad guy here?
EDIT, for context:
- hubby knew my mom, mom’s friends, and girlfriend’s would ask, and he proudly said “3ct, natural” everytime someone asked about the ring. With a ring like that, obviously everyone was like “look at that rock!”
- when I confronted hubby he apologized for lying and I immediately forgave him. This started after he found out my friends and family found out. But he should have known they would, we talk about everything
- my family is extremely close, my husband knows that and supports. I’ve been with my girlfriends since diapers and our moms are friends. We talk about everything and of course they were talking about the ring when I got engaged
EDIT, UPDATE:
- hubby and I made up 🙂 we didn’t even fight for 3 hours lol. he said he knew my friends and family would ask and that’s partially why he lied about the natural vs lab. And that he shouldn’t have gotten upset with me just for telling the truth.
- good luck with your guys’ lives. Some of you guys were super kind and I appreciate it, some of you guys were just mean and took the time to spread negative energy. To the latter group – best of luck in your romantic relationships
- lastly, I didn’t ask if I was the bad guy for preferring natural diamonds over lab diamonds. I don’t even care that much and as I stated numerous times if he would’ve told me the truth at the time I wouldn’t have cared
submitted by /u/billandted0
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