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My [30F] girlfriend of 7 months and I [30M] got tested for STIs. She says her results are negative, but does not want to show them to me.

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My [30F] girlfriend and I [30M] have been dating exclusively for about 7 months. We have not yet had sex, but we would both like to start.

To prepare, we independently scheduled appointments with our local health department to get tested for STIs. She says that she got her test results and that they're negative. I have not gotten mine yet (I took my test slightly later than her), but when I do, I intend to get a paper copy to show her. I told her this and asked if it would be possible for me to see her paper results.

She told me that she does not want to show me her paper results and that she thinks that me asking to see them demonstrates that I do not trust her. Instead, she thinks that we should proceed to have sex without showing each other our paper results.

I am uncomfortable with this idea. I do not want to contract an STI and would like some reassurance that we are safe to proceed.

She also stated that if I am not okay proceeding without being shown paper test results, that the relationship may be over because I am unable to trust her in a way that is important to her.

Should I stick to my guns and require that we show each other the paper copies of our STI test results before having sex, even if it means that she may choose to terminate the relationship, or should I take her word that her results are negative and have sex without seeing proof?

TL;DR: Girlfriend [30F] of seven months wants me [30M] to have sex without showing each other our paper STI test results. If I do not, then she may terminate the relationship. Should I stick to my guns or take her word and proceed without proof?

submitted by /u/pcgoinup
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Date: July 6, 2023

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