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Nancy Hill, 28 y.o.
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Live! Live Sex Chat rooms Nancy Hill
Date: November 23, 2022
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To be blunt, it sounds like the relationship is holding on because of the child. It sounds like you didn’t know his full personality before getting pregnant, and the two of you might not be together at this point if not for the child.
It’s pretty normal, I think. Don’t take his word on money though. To immediate to domestic relations and get a case started so they can get your child support directly from his paycheck. My narc ex husband tried to give me $50 a week for two kids and that just doesn’t fly.
As for where he is? Probably shacked up with his next supply.
So sorry. Look out for yourself and your kids. He packed and left. Don’t let him come back.
The chemistry, feeling isn't there. You got to let him go now for both of you. You'll just confuse him by your mood swings. I'm sure you have them over not caring for him.
It's unfair to both of you. Better now than later. What happens when Mr. right comes along and flips your switch on? You going to cheat or dump him with no closure.
Your starting to resent him and the relationship. I see it in the post you wrote. Nothing wrong with breaking up. He's not the one for you. Your not the first this has happened too.
Life will get better for both of you. Just tell him the feeling isn't there. Nothing you did wrong. And let him go. Hell yeah he'll hurt for a while. But he will live and move on. So will you!! Without resentment and all the emotions that go with putting it off. Sooooo just do it.
All the best OP. Peace
No I didn’t mean it like that! It’s just what I would like and I’ve voiced it but he insists I’m not compromising because he wants to be on his phone right after.
You keep using the bear line over and over, missing the obvious fact that HUMAN MALES ARE NOT BEARS. This analogy is stupid af. The whole point is we are not animals and we online in a society. And in a society, there are behaviors we can or cannot tolerate. We most definitely should not tolerate kicking and name-calling in response to mere statements of fact, poorly-received though they may be. That guy’s fragility doesn’t give him a pass to abuse OP. We as a society cannot excuse it.
You’ll get through it. It was his decision to make. He did it to help his family. His mistake was in not telling you in advance what he intended to do.
Sounds like you're wasting his time given that you said that you don't admire or fully respect him as a person. Sounds like that is the biggest issue instead of the sex. He deserves better than you as he deserves a woman who ACTUALLY admires and respects him instead of one who outright came off as toxic by saying that.
If she wasn't cutting off his advances and actually encouraging him i would be very leary . Doesn't sound like she has her priorities in the right place
It's really not that bad. He just likes you. If you end up sucking he'll re-download the app. It's not that serious. Seems more like your friends think everything men do is a red flag sinply because they're men.
In the modern age, most men just wanna find one partner who's consistent and loyal. We don't wanna sleep around while we're specifically trying to date one person. Modern women however are encouraged to sleep around and to explore as many of their options as possible while stringing said guy along until he's had enough and ghosts them, and then they want to be in a relationship. So you're right, you barely know each other, but he's interested enough that at the moment he doesn't feel the need to seek that same validation and fulfillment elsewhere.
Sounds like a green flag to me. Sounds like someone ready to settle down and commit to a loving relationship, and he's tired of playing to Tinder Roulette BS.
I mean I say I love you to male friends all the time but would be interesting to see the way both him and her act infront of his girlfriend, make it happen and gauge the girlfriends response and go from there.
But with all relationships there has to be communication and boundaries. Run through some hypothetical scenarios to see what's ok and what's not with eachother about everything not just when it comes to the opposite sex. It helps develop trust and awareness of eachother.
Yes, you sound quite childish and spoiled in your behavior. He's gone to a lot of effort to please you and it's not good enough for you? Better change your ways, he probably won't put up with it forever.
Saying I love you but I don't want to hurt anyone sounds to me like wanting both. He is trying to get you to allow him to mess around with his friend while still having you. At least that's my take. I say you just tell him that there is no way where this works out with him having both. And he needs to make a decision. Then you just need to understand that he might not pick you. And that sucks
You are absolutely correct and I appreciate your stance
Sounds horrible yet familiar. Your siblings are being failed by their parents and “the system”. At least you seem to have turned out like a good person, so clearly they aren’t doomed. Isn’t homeschooling supposed to be at least sort of regulated though?
you were a grown man dating a kid in high school- buddy YOU are the red flag
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Have you guys had a serious discussion about how your new job changes your finances when it comes to paying bills, paying for groceries etc?
You did nothing wrong, except maybe asking for compliments, which you said nothing about. But of course if a meal is good people will tell you and there is nothing wrong with that.
My wife and I love cooking too.
Whenever we have new parents in our friend group, we like to give them the typical small gifts for the baby, but we also do cook them some easy meals so that they have more time and less stress for the first days after getting home with the baby. It has always been appreciated, and it is a great gift! Time is the most valuable resource, and food is comforting and a source of joy. If you combine that it is the greatest gift ever!
Unfortunately, because of misogyny, internalised misogyny, and the all-round fragil society we live in, it is mostly advisable for a single woman to stay away from men in relationships. Mostly, I would say that as a woman there is no point in being friends with men.
They have split up recently and she messaged me again asking if I wanted to meet with her, I agreed
… why?
but again she kept on implying that she would like to get back together with me, and said that the only reason she broke up with me is because she felt pressured into doing it. As well as being pressured into spending time with her co-worker after finishing work.
pffttthahaha, so someone made her betray you and start dating them…? bahahahahahaaa!! that's the ultimate in not taking responsibility for one's actions, and I hope you also laughed.
ghosting is fine, here. if you did want to reply one final time to tell her how shitty it was for her to toy with you like that and then try to blame it on others instead of accepting responsibility for hey decisions like an adult, that would be okay as well… but the bottom line is that it's time to let this manipulative loser go for good. she doesn't deserve your friendship, and it sounds like she never did.
Nothing. You do nothing.
If she’s into you, wait for her to actually say something or message you, none of this “left you on read” and “liked your story” means anything important.
If you like her, tell her.
And try to do this in person, face to face. Less chance of anything being misconstrued.
if he’d of just said to me “hey listen, i have doubts, i’d like a DNA test for peace of mind” i’d still be slightly offended yet go through with it to ease his mind. im more hurt he sat with his ex girlfriend, planned it without me knowing and hid everything from me. if i hadn’t of found the letter, i could of gone years not knowing he did this.
When we get comfortable in relationships, we tend to start slacking. Just because we’ve won the battle doesn’t mean we’ve won the war. Romance her, ask her how her day has been, be affectionate, help with the kids and around the house if you don’t already. We all like to feel loved and appreciated and it takes work to keep that feeling alive.
How is wanting more sexual experience not about the hook ups? Thats all its about, 24 is old enough to know you dont need to fuck other people just because your partner did before the relationship, she will gaim nothing from doing so and OP will gain nothing but increased resentment if he opens this up for her to experience other men. Id give the same advice as i am now to anyone, you dont need to be a hoe, either gender, to understand you have a good thing. Odds are her friends are hooking up and she has FOMO.
When I think of “boys will be boys”, I think back to when my friends and I would stay up late playing video games and eating pizza, then getting McDonald's for breakfast
Your boyfriend is a fetishist, and despite having similar interests, not the kind of guy I would ever want to be friends with
Walk away. Just because you have gotten used to walking with a stone in your shoe, that doesn’t mean you should not dump the stone out of the shoe.
Im sorry for your loss.
Consider continuing to explore all this with your therapist! Grief has to be one of our hardest emotions, and it often comes disguised as something else.
Getting continued support from your therapist can for sure help you start to navigate dating again. Best to you?
Maybe I didn't explain well jn my post.
He's not moving out BECAUSE of this. He's moving out because he can't plan, upsets my daughter who has autism even when I've asked him to just not engage with her and ask me as I'll deal with it, his kids have behavioural issues, he won't respect my boundaries about important things, I did 95% of the cleaning and all-five child management for the first two years of our relationship, and then when I stopped he started to find it all too very hot (even though his job means more “down time” hours than mine).
So he's not moving out about this. That was incidental.
It may be scary, but you have -nothing- to be ashamed of. The abuse is not your fault, and you survived something terrible. But you survived. It sounds like the time has come to be a little vulnerable with your girlfriend. You need to at least tell her what’s going on. She likely is NOT going to hold your scars against you. Opening up to those closest to us is a part of love. Big risk, but also a way to the things that are truly good in a relationship. Closeness, intimacy, and safety. I’m hoping you two can talk it out. Be brave, and the best of luck.
They are both for the streets. Your ex either slept with him on purpose or told you to get a reaction. Don’t give her one. Just block and move on.
Throw your friend in the trash and call it a day
This doesn’t even make sense
Welcome to the Republican’s way of punishing women for being sexually assaulted.
Girl expose him to his wife. Don’t feel guilty because you didn’t know. HE should be ashamed not you
Take some distance and re-evaluate how you're feeling.
Why did he feel the need to tell you about this now?
Why did he feel the need to tell you about this now?
Don’t really matter what her history is and if she’s comfortable with it or not but if someone said that about my girlfriend I’d confront them and tell them to stfu at least, hating confrontations and being introverted isn’t an excuse to not have your partners back
Fair. It was a concert I wanted to go to also with my coworkers and would have liked the ability to choose to potentially go with the others at a later date or even just make my own choice in the matter than being led to believe no one was going
As a fellow extrovert, I have to say that dating an introvert can be hard. My husband is introverted and it can be awkward. I've had people ask me before if he talks at all. But it's rare to find two introverts date, because…well, who is even going to make the first move?
The only thing you can do here is be honest and tell him how you feel. You need to have this conversation, because he might try and put more energy out there. But then again, he might not.
Just communicate what you're feeling, but say it in a way that won't offend him. See where it goes from there.
female dating strategy
it's not a good place
Im gonan give my favorite piece of advice. Do what you want.
Roger came into your life when it was easy for him. Your dad has been there through all the naked times and made you feel loved when you thought no one would. Sometimes in life, we have to have hot conversations, and this is one for you. Tell your dad first that you want him to do it. Then tell Roger, and if he objects, explain exactly why you want it this way. He gave up his right to walk you down the aisle years ago. You owe your grandmother no explanation. It's none of her business. At 24 its time to establish yourself as an adult. Dont allow anyone else to dictate how you want to live.
Why are you still in this relationship? It doesn’t seem like you like your wife very much (probably because she does not seem at all likable) and your wife just seems like she wants control. Pull the plug, split custody, and have the friends you want to have.
He treats me with so much respect and is so gentle and loving.
If he was really treating you with respect, you wouldn't have spent the last year or however long its been being his other woman because he'd have ended his relationship before starting anything with you.
Hey OP, it’s been 10 hrs since your post, what happened?
He has shown you exactly how little he honors and respects you. You two have literally had an up and down relationship throughout most of your marriage, and most of your relationship. You are on this planet one time, for a set amount of time, too. After which, you will never live or breath or think or feel again – why are you wasting the limited time you have on this planet with someone who does not value or respect you? He's been showing you who he is from the very start, you packing your things and leaving for a night or two will not change who he inherently is – someone who selfish and lacks character.
Why different? He was a fuckboy and he only wanted her sexually too until I don't know what changed and he decided to become a bf? She didn't give him sex u tola. Year until he became her bf
I think a lot of women (and men) in their right mind would consider having a secret child a dealbreaker in a marriage.
Believe me, if OP’s wife didn’t care about him she wouldn’t be offering him so much. She’d leave and wouldn’t give a crap about things being fair.
Haha you’re dumb
thanks for the advice i appreciate it
thanks for the advice i appreciate it
I think the best thing you can do in this situation is affirm to your partner how much you love and appreciate their body and the pleasure it brings you. Don’t make it about size, just about them as a person and how they are uniquely capable of bringing you pleasure.
Lmao. This reminds me of me when I was like 13 or 14. I put silly rules on my relationship. I don’t know why, it’s just a teen thing.
This is the issue with people who discuss their relationship issues with other people especially people who clearly can't shut their mouth. She just told you that she won't fix the problems she created. That's a redflag to me personally.
Louder for those at the back!
Do you want to lose your bf? Because that is what will happen if you continue to pine for your friend who doesn't love you.
It's not fair to use someone as a place holder until the person you really want reciprocates your attraction. That's called using a person.
In fact, do your current bf a favour and let him be with someone that truly loves and appreciates him.
Talk to a lawyer first! – do your homework now before you get started on this path. It will give you the upper hand. She sounds so distracted she probably will not pick up on the raft at all. Get your ducks in a row now. hopefully you guys will make some money on your house and when you move on, it will be enough to help you reestablish yourself. It also sounds like she’s got something secret going on – spending another second trying to figure out “is she or isn’t she?” Is going to make you crazy. You’re young enough for a full fresh start. Agree to the previous post saying there are so many dogs who need love. I know it sounds cold and painful bc you love your dogs so much. Where I online every rental allows dogs – do some research on a townhouse or something with a yard you can rent for a year or so while you get reestablsihed.
You answered it with your very long defensive response. I was literally just confused. I thought at first you were saying the man was the one in a critical situation where he could get assaulted. That didn’t make sense to me. I know men can get assaulted just saying it’s far more likely for women. Having said all that, talking to you over these past few comments is incredibly frustrating. It’s like you would prefer to be withholding. So let’s just go our separate ways.
Maybe the first name he gave you isn’t his legal first name it’s just something he goes by?
I told him that I wish he had given a flower, he just said sorry
“I don't believe when you say you're sorry, because if you actually felt bad about not getting me flowers knowing how much it would mean to me you'd have done it by now. Telling me you're sorry without actually changing the behavior you're apologizing for is lame and insulting.”
You're asking for the bare minimum and he's not meeting the bar. You've been together since you were 13, maybe it's time to recognize that you've outgrown the relationship. I can't imagine this is the only issue considering it takes so little care and thought to fulfill this request and he for some reason refuses.
You deserve to have a partner that builds you up. Not this dirtbag.
Love is not a solid reason to be with a person that abused you. She is abusive.
I suggest self help books to assist with your low self esteem, tolerance of abuse, and you seeking needy people as a partner.
Change your therapist. It's not their job to advise you what to do.
Unfortunately as things stand it sounds like either you take out a restraining order against yout father and his wife or you move again. Given how tone deaf they're being to you and the relentless focus on what they want, the concern is that they secretly approach your wife and work on her, or further down the line they try to infiltrate the children's activities, school, friends' parents etc.
If there's any tiny part of you that's open to a reconciliation, make clear to them exactly what you need from them for that to happen – like a written acknowledgement of what they did and all the ways that affected you, with a proper apology, followed by a cooling off period of several months to let the dust settle and reset.
Right who is this much of a piece of utter trash. Lmao apparently saw the edit depression is to blame for him being a fucking trashy friend sleeping with a equally trashy af waste of a woman who is married.
If this is real OP is a piece of shit. And a side piece.
His friends wife is a waste of space! And if he has any real human feelings he would tell the guy and fuck off.
Not only did YOU CHEAT, you encouraged your friend to cheat as well. You both need to get dumped because you’re both cheaters.
I couldn't read all of this. I've been with my husband 12 years, married for 10, he's never once told someone I belong to him. What the fuck?
Why are you working to save a relationship that shouldn’t be saved?
He doesn’t respect you and your children. HE CHEATE DO YOU. You can spin this open relationship shit anyway you want it to – but it wasn’t open when he met her and got emotionally involved with her.
Get therapy and a divorce lawyer.
I wouldn’t even consider this an age gap. You are around the same age thus it is not a gap. Long distance can be a deal breaker regardless of how good the relationship is. If it’s a deal breaker for you then you need to express that and accept it. Long distance takes sacrifices on both sides. If you aren’t willing to give any then this may not be the relationship dynamic for you.
You seem to want to excuse your sister. Like, a lot. This is absolutely a thing that you disown a family member over. You are severely downplaying what she did here.
a little update: thank you guys for all the advice and support. i’ve decided to talk to my sister friday night. i want to talk to her first because i really cannot stand the idea of speaking to my bf right now. i told him that i need space and i’m probably gonna break things off this weekend. i also want to talk to my sister before i talk to my parents. i’m not expecting anything good to happen i’m hoping that if i confront her first that maybe she’ll just come clean and agree to tell my parents. i will update this weekend!