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Date: October 24, 2022
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You miss what you had? What exactly was that? You communicated to him during the relationship that certain things weren’t working and he seems to have made minimal, nominal efforts to improve. You felt alone in the relationship and my guess is that would be the feeling that would define your marriage. And also, rather than make genuine efforts to address your issues and create change, he went out and got himself a FWB. For me that would be the move that would make me shut the door on any future. Breaking up is painful and right now it sounds like you’re in it. Focus on the negatives, the concrete reasons that forced you to pick up and leave in the first place. You did this in an attempt to get him to realize the seriousness of your unhappiness. His response was to beg and plead, accuse you of seeing someone else and then begin to see someone else himself. You have zero reason to believe that anything would be different if he suddenly says let’s move back in together. So then, why would you even consider reconciliation? Be sad, mourn the loss of what was and what could have been, but hold out for someone that aligns better with your expectations. This is where you need a good dose of a self-esteem booster. Reach out to friends and family. Good luck.
You should have told her why when you couldn't get hot in the moment. You can't let this stuff fester man. If you wait too long, you look like the bad guy for not bringing it up sooner.
That said, I'm sorry that happened. I had such bad insecurity (despite being very confident) that I now take viagra to be able to get hot and I'm a healthy 28 year old.
He may have been morbidly obese and lost a lot of weight requiring excess skin to be removed, leaving scars and he is very self conscious about it. It may be from something tragic from his past. In the long run, he isn't ready to talk about it, so you need to leave it alone. It isn't like he has an upside down cross or German WWII cross tattooed on his chest. Let him open up over time. If the “secrecy” becomes too much, maybe you should just walk away instead of upsetting him.
My man, you've got your whole life ahead of you. Don't let this person imprint on you that this is behavior that you should just accept and try to accommodate.
You are 19 years old. You should be living your best life.
I'll tell you the same thing I told my son he turned 18 (He's 27 now, so I'm old and country):
“Son, don't waste your time with a woman that don't respect you. That's like rinsing out garbage before you put out for the trash truck. It's still gonna stink.”
Both people don’t always have to do all the exact same things as each other
Would he deserve to be emotionally abused if he was a 'lazy fuck up'… What constitutes as lazy enough to be purposefully abused over it? Ever heard the saying two wrongs don't make a right?
And in this instance the only thing we know is he left one sock under the bed and one bowl out.
Regardless of OPs behaviour, his partner needs to find a better way to communicate her issues.