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Osito Blanco, 31 y.o.
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Osito Blanco
Date: November 1, 2022
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First and foremost, you need to stop making excuses. In the same breath that you take “responsibility” and say you want to change, you make excuses and make it more about yourself. You couldn't bear seeing your gf in so much pain? She's the one actually in pain bringing your child into the world! Stop making excuses, stop giving “reasons” for why you acted the way you did. Just say, “Yes, I did these things, and I'm sorry.” Then go about making it up to her. Make sure she doesn't need to worry about basics. Try to check in with her on how she's doing emotionally. Help her get sleep and get what she needs to heal. Do not make her cater to you physically or emotionally in any way. You need to start doing backbends every moment of every day to take care of her and this baby, beginning with NO MORE EXCUSES.
Thank you, I appreciate more detail – though, respectfully, I think that you are focusing on a part of the post that I was not focused on… perhaps I should reupload it and remove that part. I feel like your opinion about the non-monogamous idea is clear, but not necessarily on the situation itself and what you would do (not that it is easy to have opinions like that on a stranger's post). I wanted to be crystal clear that, to be honest, the non-monogamous thought came more as a crutch or middle ground option from conversations we've had previously and probably just from my own difficulty in conceptualizing just ending a 6.5 year relationship suddenly. I'm not really suggesting that it's my preferred method and I take what you say seriously – but the fundamental conflict I was having was moreso with the break up or not question, with the “break” being a perhaps flawed or misconceived middle option.
Basically, I completely get what you're saying about the open part being a terrible idea especially given her mental health – I'm just more interested in people's thoughts about this situation itself and the binary decision between breaking up or not. The difficulty I'm having is I DO love this person and appreciate this person almost in the way that I would a family member at this point. And obviously any relationship can theoretically improve with enough work. The difficulty I'm having is the trend of the relationship, the growing apart, my “losing time” angst, etc.
Obviously it's been easy for me to stay in a relationship, I've been in one since being 21. It's clear to me how to work on a relationship and push each other to seek therapy and help – this has been the strategy for about 4 years now. I'm trying to conceptualize if this situation is a sign that I should consider ending it, despite the fact that it could theoretically improve – or what would be a sign that I should do it.
What I worry about is ignoring these mixed feelings, having this get worse, and then wasting more of each other's time ultimately.