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Lets make it messy!
Date: December 28, 2022
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PleasingMyPussyNow
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Wow you people always go to the scenario where the other part is an absolute douchebag without any kind of indication that they are. You're basing his whole image on one text message he sent.
What's to say he didn't have a psychosis and is delusion? What's to say a family member didn't die and he can't handle the sorrow? For fuck sake…
No matter where your parents are, I am sure if you call them and tell them you need help they will be there. You just saw your mom, maybe she can come to you.
As naked as it is, he planned this for a long time. He groomed you. You even say he feels like a parent. That’s because he’s so much older and was an adult when he met a child. I know this is extremely hard to wrap your head around.
Also call your friends. Even if you have not talked to them in a while. Make connections. Please make a plan to exit this relationship safely.
I did write her a letter expressing how sorry I am for everything I’ve done in detail explaining exactly what I could have done differently to show her I know exactly what is wrong with me and how I intend to fix them. Unfortunately her response was “I wish you realized this earlier”. I don’t know if I can forgive myself for this.
It might sound harsh, but I think because it’s so impossible to tell if the person will be your forever person, and if not, then you could have a lot of trouble dating if you contract herpes. I thought a lot about if we broke up how difficult it could be to have found someone I thought I was super compatible with and then have them drop me because I had it. I know you’re currently in this situation with them, but think about the tables reversed for you if you don’t stay together.
My parents are closer to me In age than you and this guy. He is literally older than my dad. I’m 28
You not enjoying anal is enough reason for not doing it.
What exactly is what makes you uncomfortable with trying some stuff on him? For me apart of the hygene (what is easily solved) problem with trying new things was my Conservative upbringing, but at one point I decided that I can always ask for some time to think about it and decide later. Most of the things I would decide to try at least couple of times to see how I like it. Turned out I liked a lot of stuff and became much more couragous with trying new things. Sometimes they are boring, not nice, but mostly add a nice flavour to my sex life.
I have lately experienced for the first time giving a man pleasure by vibrating buttplug and pegging and have to say that it felt surprisingly empowering. I did not expect myself to enjoy it the way I did. There was just something really pleasurable about being to see a man I care about trusting me so much and letting himself receive this extreme pleasure when I can just observe it.
If you asked me some time ago, I would tell you that I am not into that at all.
I wouldn't worry so much about all the gay suggestion, men's g spot is accessible this way and it really gives them a lot of pleasure. Man doenst have to be into men to enioy anal pleasure.
I’ve never seen these, I don’t feel entitled to them, they are her pictures she can do what she wants with them, but it makes me wonder why she hasn’t shown me, and why her friends but not me. It feels like she doesn’t trust me, or like maybe i don’t make her comfortable
Be honest with yourself. You want to see them and she hasn't shown you. The rest is crap.
If you want something, ask.
He hid the porn in a secret folder
leave him or you’re wasting everybody’s time. you’ve been together since you were 18 and he was 37? you’ve clearly been sexually and emotionally groomed into doing things you don’t even like. leave, there’s better men out there.
It’s not playful if you hate it. He’s doing something he knows you hate. Your husband is a real piece of shit and he knows exactly what he’s doing.
She’s getting half of that house regardless. Never add a person name onto property that you’re not married too nor a person that isn’t contributing towards said house. She been living the high life for almost 10 years…
I would stop paying for her right away. Make her get a job to contribute to the home, because sadly she’s part owner so you can’t kick her out. Someone has to move eventually. I could care less of her being the other parent of my child, this woman has zero respect for you and all that you do to provide a roof over your child’s head And HERS.
I would have died as the child of a single father
but also I'm wondering if I should try to please my boyfriend
Nope.
You should never do something that involves intimacy/sex just to satisfy your partner.
If you're not fully comfortable with it, 100% free will, its off the table.
He’s scamming you and her, she’s the next target. Once the “loan” comes through he’s gonna peace out. Good luck getting your money back. Girl! Ask yourself is his loving worth $25k and the years it’ll take to pay it back?!!
If his main issue is taking your son, leave him with his parents. You don’t want to expose the kid diseases he is I’ll equipped to fight in areas that may not have the best healthcare. Besides, it’ll be more fun anyway.
He’s doing this to control you!!! He doesn’t need your money at all. He’s your BF joy even your husband!
Put yourself and your happiness first.
You're valid for your feelings no matter what they are.
Don't get engaged, move in together or marry him. No big trip to Mexico either. Since he is not working those things need to go on pause. Your questions need to be all about him making unilateral decisions. Does he even have an education in investing?
None of this should have happened. Let's look at this, what makes this guy an asshole, first he supposedly is a good friend and second, he's sober.
She drank too much (if her boyfriend was telling the story, you would be saying she is using the I was drunk excuse). Then there was the flirting in the car on the way to her boyfriends' apartment (so they were leading each other on). Then in the apartment he makes a move on her, and he kisses her, and she admits to hesitantly kisses him back (she drunk but not drunk enough that she doesn't knows what she is doing is wrong by her own admission). Then she states one thing led to another and they had sex. But she said she don't remember which is the I blackout excuse.
What is missing, she was sober enough to know what she was doing was wrong but never in her description nor in any of the following replies does she ever state she tried to push him off or told him to “stop”. If she says it now, it's too late.
This was just one mistake after another, drinking too much, boyfriend not taking her home, ' trusting a not friend, the flirting, the friend taking advantage of her, her not telling him to stop which has now ruined three people's lives.
If you don't tell him before you go on the trip it will make you look really bad, like you cheated on him and still wanted a free trip (even thou that is not your intention). Going on the trip will make you look like a cheater and a liar.
Yeah this is me 100% – when I started dating the last time I decided that I wasn't going to have sex with anyone I hadn't had the timeline talk with. Especially since I online in a metro area where it seems everyone of any gender is either 1) childfree, 2) super on the fence or 3) not even considering starting a family until mid-30s. All of those positions are totally fine if they are right for other people, but that is not where my head is at. I knew it would be so so easy to accidentally fall in love with the “dominant views” when I really want to be getting married in the next couple of years and starting my family at around 29/30. If I end up dating even 2 or 3 people for 6 months before even ASKING about it then I have no chance at my timeline.
I don't think you need to bring it up on a first date, but I'm was not about to let things go longer than a month or so without being sure they were on the same page. Maybe I scared some people off, but that was kind of the point. Now I'm with someone that I know is 100% on the same timeline as me and, more importantly, is totally open to those conversations if anything comes up to change it.
I’ve asked
Could be Autistic? (High functioning of course) cuz this sounds like a general experience I hear on r/aspergirls or sometimes get to experience myself where your talking to someone and everything seems great and then they just stop at some point , won't talk to you more won't include you etc no reasons ever given just a general vibe of go do your own thing you know?
Also autism in the LGBT community is highly linked hence why he got along with you all so well (I am not diagnosing you and all your friends with autism btw I'm just saying there could be a correlation that could have to do with neurodivergence) like I don't think my friends would vibe very well in neurotypical environments lol
He actually is an amazing communicator, that's why I married him. This is the first major thing that came up over the years we've been together and that's why it just weirds me out so much and why I'm posting.
We never had issues with jealousy, bugging each other throughout the day for no reason and being codependent, goals in life, friends and family, etc etc. Whatever topic, we've never had any major fights and always resolved the miniscule stuff calmly. Like a team, you know? When each of us struggles with something, we talk about it and help each other. We give each other plenty of space and time on our own.
That's why this one is so weird to me. Because if there is a genuine problem he'd have with wfh, he'd tell me (or so I thought). Or if there isn't even a reason, I thought he would tell me (because he always did with whatever other thing came up over the years).
Yes, it is. People give horrible legal advice all the time and give people a cartoonish view of what the process would be if they did actually have something bad happen. Someone who has just been traumatized usually isn't thinking super clearly, and intentionally putting out shitty advice is going to muddy up the process even more. Like, what is your end goal? What do you even think a restraining order is?
I don’t think he’s bad at all for having emotions and I’ve always tried to be supportive and caring as possible with him (I get very caretaker-ish when I’m a relationship) but I also never wanted to push it. It’s just naked for me to understand why he would have been all over my friend like that is what makes it uncomfortable for me. I would never judge him for his emotions, just how he reacted off of it
Buy a cheap bag of bird food. Put it in a bowl. Next time he does the bird call, throw the bird food in this face, and say, here, parrot, here's your food. If he blows up, say to him, if you ever do that bird call again, you will wake up with all your possessions in trash bags outside the house, watch me
That sounds so horrible, good on you for leaving. I'd continue that action & leave him permanently. It's one thing for the friends to act like that – awful, but they're not in a relationship with you – but his reaction is completely unacceptable. He should have immediately come over, removed her, shut the door & told his friends to knock it off. Not to mention gone to comfort you once he realised you were upset. His actions show you that going along with his immature friends is more important to him than you or your relationship. Especially given when you left & he sobered up he didn't immediately come home to apologise. Sorry you had such an awful time.
Are you financially dependent on your parents and worried about getting cut off? If yes then you have to find a way to get independent from them and then you can do as you wish.
If you’re not financially dependent, do what you want and they can die mad about it if needed. You’re an adult.
I think it’s best to be honest here. Maybe just say escort for cash and see how they take it? Don’t have to disclose more than you are comfortable with. But at least they know and you know that they know. Ya know?
To be honest, I would rotate between them and let your parents know you love theirs and you’ll still be wearing it!
Maybe another thing you could do is see if you could personalise the back of the watch your parents gave with a message from them or something so that they see it’s sentimental to you, might make them feel a bit better?
It is a crap thing in your fiancées behalf though especially since it wasn’t a coincidental thing (your mum had spoken to her and asked her not to get you a similar watch)
Do you have a sibling that could donate? That is what my lesbian couple friends did because they wanted family genetics.
The fact that you would even write this after 7 months at age 20………