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Anal play [Multi Goal]
Date: October 13, 2022
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PleasingMyPussyNow
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Find out if he's looking for love or not. If he is, ask what's stopping him from loving you. You needed to know if this is never going anywhere.
And be thankful he didn't just lie, that would have been much worse in the long run. That honesty will have been difficult.
It sounds like you’ve been through a lot recently- and I’m so sorry for your losses and that you are dealing with all of this emotional pain. Someone who loves you, should make room and make time and make necessary adjustments- no matter what little inconvenience and petty feelings they have about not being the center of attention- to help you get through what is clearly a traumatic event.
If someone isn’t willing to make sure your health or your mental and emotional well-being is secure, that person isn’t going to play a positive role in your life at the moment.
Not to say that she is a bad person, but sometimes people are not right for us… right now. And you can’t be there for her either if you don’t take the necessary time to heal from these things either.
Your life is about YOU. I’ve been working on this myself this past year and it’s easier said than done. I know. But I’ve found as very hot as it is sometimes to let someone go, even for a little while- or take a break from these people- it’s harder on us to continue to feel and build resentment towards them for not being capable of understanding what you really need.
I’m very sorry you are going thru such a very hot time, and I hope in all of my disorganized rambling I’ve helped some?
I will say it again. This is NOT a “friend”.
Friends do NOT behave this way towards each other.
I understand you like to use the word because of all the emotional energy
it bespeaks, but you are kidding yourself.
Frankly I would not maintain a relationship with anyone with whom I
did not have reciprocal best wishes and encouragement with.
Dude, you are the one being abused here. You literally pay for everything, so everything and all she does is complain and make you feel like shit. Run seriously… she is gaslighting the f-ck out of you. You must be exhausted.
This makes so much more sense. You’re right, I missed that. Yeah you’re right he’s insecure. I mean. Sometimes people are weird about talking about ex’s, but imo my past can’t be changed so that’s that.
What is he like when hanging out in person
If I were him, I wouldn't give a damn about the why. She tried to hit him, there's no excuse for that no matter how off she thought he was acting.
Not to mention, everyone is entitled to their privacy and he shouldn't have to explain why he didn't want her to go through his phone. But really, there's no point in communication when her response was violence.
Do you have a female friend who can answer for you, and pretend it's your new gf? The best way to shut it down, is to make them believe you moved on. She can be hello…. who is this… why would you call ny bf? Don't you have better things to do?
You realise why you're probably getting downvotes though, right?
100% I do. People are downvoting because they don't understand the difference between an explanation and an excuse.
They also don't care about what drives people to chest as that puts sone responsibility on “the victim”.
I misunderstood that part, my apologies! But, I misunderstood based on how it sounds like you have actively rejected a colleague after ending up in a taxi with them.
If she's rejecting your advances, you need to have an open conversation about that. A simple “I don't think we're on the same page sexually and I need to talk about that.” is all it takes to start that conversation.
If she's not open to having that conversation, you do need to consider leaving and whether or not this is a dealbreaker for you – which sexual incompatibility often is.
It's only an estimate based on the hormone levels and it only works for the first few weeks.
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And? What did she say?
I kinda understand cuz this is her partner, someone who should care. But I still think if y’all have been dating for a bit and this is something he’s wanted to do for a long time w his friends… if the date that lines up for all of them is her bday there’s not much he can do.
None of those were taken before you turned 18?
Unfortunately I have to agree witht that.
Girlie, she said she was jealous, leave it at that. Don’t be her friend. Go hug your husband for the wonderful life you have. I mean, yeah, it sucks to think that you were the ‘second’ option, but you mean to tell me that just bc your first choice doesn’t always work out then the second choice can’t be better? Life doesn’t work like that. You have what you have! She doesn’t.
This was absolutely heartbreaking for me to read OP. I am so sorry that you are feeling this way and that this happened to you – I would be so devastated too. I want to echo what some others have said and suggest the potential of trying different therapists or types of therapy, as well as the fact that this situation seems very similar to a case of infidelity and using resources regarding that may be helpful. Finally, completely out of left field, I’d like to suggest a book to you. It may not do anything for you at all, but something is telling me to recommend The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It changed my life in a time where I was obsessing and spiralling day in and day out about things that had happened to me and ways I was hurting. In the off chance that it might help you in this awful time, I feel I have to mention it. Sending you all the loving kindness I can muster ♥️.
I would argue that she didn’t actually carry out an emotional affair. OP says she had a crush on him, told the guy, and the guy confessed to feeling attraction too. That’s what happens before a relationship starts. Then she quite literally distanced herself in every way possible. Affair averted.
We’re definitely on the same page regarding the poor decision making. I just think OP losing feelings to this degree is a massive overreaction (and I suspect there’s more to the story. I’d love to hear the wife’s side. Crushes/emotional affairs frequently start because they’re not getting emotional fulfillment at home.)
Is she on her mission? If so she WILL try to convert you. Her family will expect it , her group, her church everyone. Her good standing with the church would depend on it if she wants to be with your long term. Being mormon isn't just a religion she does on Sunday or whatever. It is a complicated social dynamic that infests every part of her life. She would have socialized within wards , if shes from Utah her whole block and most of her school may have been mormon. Her marriage to a MORMON man matters for her entrance into the ” celestial kingdom”. They will go to great lengths to convert you because she will want to be sealed to you if you marry. DO NOT THINK SHE WILL ONLINE CASUALLY WITH YOU FOR YEARS ON END WITHOUT MARRIAGE.
If shes just in spain NOT on her mission and just is mormon because she casually identifies that way you have a slim chance. Maybe.
And be careful, the girls are taught( unfortunately) to keep sweet and mirror their partners interests because of the idea of female submissiveness. One young lady I know( my daughters friend) her interests change with every new man in her life. Right now shes trying to play gamer girl anime fan because that's what her husband likes . she LOATHES that stuff privately. Its not their fault, they are taught this subtly throughout their lives in church groups.
Good luck.
Just be careful with birth control and manage it yourself is all I’m gonna say. A vasectomy would be smart. She might stop taking her birth control.
Yes
So weird, I fully believe people shouldn't be forced to have kids against their will but these are his best reasons??? Will mess up his church fashions and perfect gender ratio, that must suck for his wife to hear these batshit reasons whilst she is helping raise his 4 kids from another women.
There are none so blind as they who will not see.
You’re trying to find another explanation for your friend’s behavior because you don’t want to lose a friend. But the fact is there are lots of guys who are into girls but who aren’t bold enough to make a move and the indications are that your best friend is one of them.
You need to talk to your friend and explain your feelings and what you want your relationship with him to be. Even if he really doesn’t want to be in a romantic relationship with you, it can’t hurt to talk to him about it.
But if he actually does want to be with you in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, set boundaries with him and if he won’t agree or breaks those boundaries, you will stop being friends with him. And stick to your guns.
Think it out, man. Why would she take risque photos and not send them to you or show them to you? How would he save them to his phone if he's fixing something on her phone? Why didn't he “resist” if he's your friend? How do you see photos “by accident”? Why would she just want to forget it happened?
File for divorce. Lose her. Lose him.
i thought about breaking up but she told me i was being overdramatic and it was just a prank. shes done this before too so i just thought this was her sense of humor or something
Just stop hanging out with her. It doesn't sound like you're in a committed relationship.
My biggest fear is breaking up with someone ???
Bumble BFF has settings that give him the option of female friends. And the women on the dating side of bumble might not even be looking for friends.
He's trying to be sneaky, and he's not even going a good job of it. Stand your ground.
You already told her how much it bothers you and she doesn’t are because she doesn’t respect you. Is she getting paid to post these thirst traps? If it’s not her job then you’re right she just wants attention from other dudes
Either way it’s toxic and abusive.
You don't think it's going to ruin your daughters life when he assaults her or one of her friends? You are so insanely off base here.
Also the fact that one of his children is acting out is pretty fucking alarming given his proclivity to molesting children.
Staying with your husband is not protecting your child. It is black and white because this is almost guaranteed to hurt your daughter and his other children in ways you most definitely are unable to understand.
Also your husband possesses child pornography. Go to the police. That should absolutely be enough to limit his access to your daughter. And if you're just opposed to completely severing their relationship you can still arrange proper supervised visitation.
You're welcome
Have you thought about working outside the home? You say you make a lot of money, it might be worth finding somewhere else to work, you won't be able to nap but you won't get interrupted and find yourself doing chores throughout the day. Being home all day os bad for your mental health, it's something you should both think about
I don't avoid having conversations about my anxiety with my husband, but he has trouble empathizing with me and often lectures me about what he thinks I'm doing wrong that's causing the anxiety. Phil comforts me in a way that is very similar to how my female friends do and it makes me feel a lot better. Brian cares about me very much but he has kind of a “tough love” mentality and is not good at comforting others. We have addressed this and he actually prefers that I discuss my feelings with people in my life who are more intuitively supportive such as my friends and family because he really doesn't know how to connect emotionally and doesn't want to learn.
You're loco. He needs to run
He is the kind of guy who used to sleep around with women. After we started dating, he stopped but his actions make me feel he wants her and maybe she doesn't but is insisting by being too nice just to get out of the friendzone.
Your friend is right and the tinder guy is a creep
I propose that we make correct syntax mandatory on r/relationship_advice as that is it’s correct purpose.
That's fair. I need to grow up
I'm baffled by the fact that multiple people have said something like “at least he didn't cheat!”
Something like this would drive me to divorce my husband way quicker than cheating or at least equally so.
I would never believe a thing he says in the future. He went so far to concoct a lie and involved his friend in it. That speaks volumes to his character and the lengths he will go to to hide his deception. As you said you are only 24. Go and find someone so much better, you deserve to have trust in your relationship.
I would never believe a thing he says in the future. He went so far to concoct a lie and involved his friend in it. That speaks volumes to his character and the lengths he will go to to hide his deception. As you said you are only 24. Go and find someone so much better, you deserve to have trust in your relationship.
Lol no? I'm not sure he would figure it out but once he did, that kale is my ex fwb. He wouldn't be happy
I read your posts… yall need to get divorced.
You did. You aren’t break up now.
I’ll just preface this by saying I’m a childfree guy who is a massive feminist, so my opinion might not matter too much here. But for me what is the downside to everyone having paternity tests? Like literally everyone would be on the same page and there would be no dispute who’s the child is, I just don’t see a single downside.
Now what’s not opinion is quite frankly your BF is a POS who verbally abuses you and treats you like dirt. You shouldn’t even be entertaining the idea of having kids with this man, he is not a good one.
It's his also.
He got back what he had given to her in material and immaterial things.
I think the problem with situations like these isn't that people don't believe it was assault and assume it was consensual, it's that a lot of people ( not just women) don't really take the necessary precautions to stay safe when drinking and take no accountability for that.
In itself, no.
It's about what she does with her crush. Telling you about it, is great first move. She should try to stay away from her crush, as much as it possible given the circumstances, and it should go away by itself, eventually
Tell him that he is a boob. Then tell him to find a woman with big boobs that’s willing to tolerate his shallow ass. Tell him he no longer has to be ashamed of your perky young breasts.
It looks like you've got some really sound advice here from several people. I would focus on the comments which emphasize communicating with the bf and addressing what is still left over in your head.
What I really wanted to say though is, you want to name the people who are harassing you in your private messages? Share some screenshots or report them? We really ought to ban them back to 4chan or wherever the fuck.
Second sentence
Yeah you’re probably right, it’s just that I can’t bring myself to tell him no – the way he helped me out allowed me to online a much better life than I used to.
He’s definitely in a different situation as that money isn’t life-changing, but I presume he knows what’s best for him?
This has to be fake. Like if it's not, his reaction is fucking mental.
And yours too tbh with, “I know this means we're not compatible”… What are you on about? What a load of nonsense. The only incompatibility is you knowing it didn't matter when you told him you read, and him thinking it does matter. If this is even real, which I find very hot to believe, but then people are nuts so maybe. I usually expect actually well educated adults not to be quite as nuts though.
You do read, you didn't misrepresent yourself. Why does he even care. Like, just nonsense.
3 months. We were exclusively dating and he always referred to us as bf/gf.
She basically told you no….. sorry dude. I think it’s best to walkaway from this trainwreck
You are over 25 and he is not yet 40. Looks ok.
leave her she’s abusive. please get out before this violence escalates even more.
I’d probably still leave him, even if he didn’t go. Goodluck
If you’re so stubborn about ending this marriage, why did you give up on your first marriage to daughters bio-mom?
Stop asking his permission to put yourself first. You're unhappy and don't want to move. So don't. Don't leave room for him to sweet talk you. This isn't a discussion, there is nothing to negotiate. You tell him you've decided that you won't be moving, and you two need to spend some time apart and see how that goes and proceed from there.
Just one no is all it takes to end a relationship. He is clearly unhappy but change is scary, and he has you working your ass off for him already so why give that up? What do YOU get out of this relationship? You could be happier on your own too.
I mean obviously she didn’t communicate it well the first time. She actually opened up about the issue this time.
Gross. That's not true for many people. Their attraction ages with them.
I find people in their late 20s-30s to be more attractive than teenagers.
Just because some people don't mature doesn't mean we all don't.
No, this isn't high school text them both at the same time, you make think he doesn't owe you anything but to being engaged to then screwing your best friend in matter of months says they was at it long before or have been secretly pinning.
Text both.
” you are absolutely disgusting, did you seriously think I wouldn't find out?? To go from a 5 year relationship to screwing eachother within a matter of months tells me this has been going on for a while… I don't care to hear either of your reasons or excuses, your both disgusting human beings, not once did you consider my feelings In all of this, and now you don't have too, I'm blocking the both or you, I don't want to see or speak to either of you again, if you see me on the street keep on walking, you are both vile and both dead to me.”
Then block them both, there no way they just started sleeping together it either going on way before your split or they have over stepped boundaries with each other through out, send the message and block them both, old enough to not play silly games
is he selling for drugs? does he think you cheated? why would he do this?
And this is how it happens……..
If you want to be polyamorous, then you don't date people who aren't interested in being in a poly relationship.
Your first message was the inbred kids and the poverty kids felt most likely
Enjoy living hand to mouth you pos
No. People should not be talking about him at all. That’s like the groom’s mother turning up in a white wedding dress.
Leave him at home.
Like come on man you’re doing nothing with your life except trolling Reddit. That’s fucking pathetic.
NTA.
Your wedding, your rules.
Maybe having to choose between her best friends wedding or her shitty partner will waker her dumb ass up.
Welcome to the new America.
Why can't you make him leave? If you have written rules, he's certainly violated them with his behavior.
Stop simping
You can literally do at home free hearing tests online. All they do is check your response to certain tone, pitch and decibel levels, exactly as they do in an official test.
At least doing this OP would be able to rule in or out any actual hearing difficulties.
However reading OPs comments, it doesn't sound like a hearing issue, it sounds more like an issue with listening and doing other things at the same time. If I'm writing or reading I cannot listen, my brain doesn't work that way but my hearing is perfect. Very easy way to check free of cost
I also want to jump onto this to add that in OPs other post (linked here) has A LOT of missing information that is very… illuminating.
Specifically…
I get angrIER soo much easier, I WANT to fight sometimes. And its not just anger, all my emotions are off the chart, sorrow, fear, anger, remorse, regret, jealousy, all of them. People in general treat me differently from before, not only do I feel intimidating sometimes but I can also see in the other person's eyes that to them I AM intimidating, which I find thrilling,
Divorce.
But she leaves the home.
Cheaters do not deserve to be nice and comfy while the person they cheated on is couch surfing with family/friends or staying in a hotel
No you didn't f up. When it comes to texting women, less is more. A good way to put a woman off is to bombard her with texts because it looks like the man doing it is desperate.
I think you're right. I've tried so very hot on trying to save this relationship but it's impossible when the effort is so one sided. I need to think about an exit strategy, which won't be easy because I moved a bunch of states away from my home state to be with him. First thing I'll do is just save money and try to think of what else I can do. I also need to work on detaching myself from him, which has been easy emotionally because I don't get much love from him anyways to even be emotionally attached at this point. :/ It's funny that you say I'm his punching bag because that's literally what I used to say to him “I'm not your punching bag” literally since we first got together I would say that.
Don’t assume that, because you are holding onto this, that she is. Leave her alone.