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Date: October 21, 2022
2-4 times a week is actively still being a drug addict. Also he is way too old for you.
He wants you to be his “mommy” run.
Pretty much all after marriage. It started slowly at first.
How chivalrous of him to take a hit on the money..what about your portion, is he going to pay you back? You've been together for 4 years, you've had 2 kids the entire time, and now he can't handle it? Nope. You and your children are a package deal. Period.
You did the right thing in texting him. Either way, response or not, you’ll know if he’s into you.
Also, looks are only part of the equation of what makes someone attractive. Please try not to discount yourself, friend.
If he drinks enough that he can't control his bodily functions it doesn't matter if it's every day or once a year, he has a problem. He's an alcoholic.
Congratulations on finding just one of a thousand different awesome bonuses to dating out of your age bracket! I don't think any of this should be a surprise tbh….its not just a coincidence there's so many issues popping up in relationships dealing with someone out of the other's age bracket.
Maui
Cruel intentions is pretty gross on it’s face honestly.
He basically wants an open relationship.
“Do it if it makes you feel better” implies doing it whether the other party likes it or not.
GTFO of there.
Dude is having trouble and unless he's ACTUALLY seeing a professional to deal with his anger issues, this is going to get worse.
He is dancing the line of being physically abusive, GET OUT.
You said exactly what I was thinking. The only excuse I could say is that his friends and I wouldn’t get along. He’s already said we’re extremely different and would clash heads. They wouldn’t like me at all just due to my skin colour and that hurts because they’re judging me without knowing me as a person. Judging me without knowing what I do for that man
Total bullshit. That isn't really a problematic age gap, and you do not have enough info to suggest he's manipulative.
She very clearly had some sexual abuse trauma to be reacting like this.
I agree and she has acknowledged it since. I’m going to reinforce my point that this is not acceptable. I just didn’t want to initially be controlling and tell her she can’t hangout with certain people
Ugh, maybe. What do you do about that?
Seems like you both are on two different boats, just passing each other in the night. If the love is still there, that's one thing, but if the work needed to actually be close again is one-sided, then you will only be putting in all the effort for nothing…
Sit down and have a serious talk about what you both want and what you are willing to do or sacrifice to make it work again…
To be a sugar daddy?
It seems like she genuinely has feelings and wants to be with you. You sound like you enjoyed her company, but there are no feelings there. Cut her off and tell her not to come. Why get involved in an overseas relationship? All it takes is one slip, she’s knocked up, and you have a total disaster on your hands.
Standard bible playbook you can only trust yourself.
Astronomical makes it sound like the chances are great
Maybe astronomically small was what you meant?
I told one of my sons that dad 'went to get the milk'. I gave it about 30 seconds to click and he laughed and asked 'for real?'. I told him yes but it was my decision. Kid had an awesome sense of humor so I knew this would be the best way.
Taylor Swift is once in a lifetime. You can always get another college degree. Ha!
I must say, I’ve seen a lot of good advice in this thread, and I don’t have any of my own, so all I’m gonna say is I wish you luck in finding something that works and makes you both happy! Also, even though I’ve never met someone with a huge libido, I want you to know that it is definitely normal, simply because there are others who also have a high libido ???
I feel on my behalf that I am healthy in this relationship or do you disagree
For a lot of guys it’s the equivalent of a girl using a vibrator. It’s simply a tool to get to the end faster. Id day for a lot of guys it’s purely visual, like you aren’t actually doing anything, it’s just visually arousing. Now sure you can have an addiction to it, but if it’s used in moderation it’s normal.
That’s not easy. I feel like things will go wrong because he loves to sabotage any kind of relationships, also friendships. As soon as he himself doesn’t feel good he is probably gonna doubt me and the relationship since that is supposed tk make him happy. Oh god what did I get into
that's how dating works? like what do you mean lol of course you try and see if you think you're a good match, you don't go around saying yes to every single person
I’m sorry OP 🙁
This dude needs a lesson in consent damn
She might change, but that doesn't mean you should stay. Abusers almost never change and it's worse for the kids to be around an abuser
Avoid contact with him. Block him on everything if that's what you need to do. He's torn between having to choose to upset his family or be with you. Since he's already shown he doesn't have what it takes to bring you home, you have your answer. Stop hoping for what is not going to happen. You'll just get more hurt.
You’re getting dumped after Christmas
Stick to your $45k budget. Tell her that if she wants anything over and above the budget then she has to put in money.
Remember it’s not just her wedding, it’s your wedding too, so you have just as much say as she does, but also she has just as much responsibility to pay for it.
You break it, you buy it.
His kids were not at the fake house. That’s like a whole other level of douchebaggery. But I do know where the house is. I have all of his messages and screenshots of his Tinder profile. I’m still sitting on this for a minute because I want to do it the best way possible. Also, I did gather from insta that it’s his sons bday today & I don’t want to make it a shitty day for his wife.
I’m just super pissed because I was just telling my best friend that I never want to be in this situation again. It happened before when I was 30 and ugh. It was even worse then because this guy was really living a double life & things were serious.
What a beautiful update! Love, peace, and happiness to you both!
this guy's an extreme case. don't make broad sweeping statements.
it's like looking at a group of women who enjoy wine, finding that one who is a severe alcoholic and ends every single night fighting a cop and saying “this is why I don't date wine drinkers”.
At this point I think she would accept as little as a “sorry boo won’t do it again”
I have seen older people act like that. I have seen 22 years old being mature. Being honest in a relationship has nothing to do with age.
Ok!
Then I will add a few things. You are clearly in love with her, but she is not in love with you. Your error is that you behave as a)you are a couple and not friends (buying stuff – ensuring her financial safety) and b) moving around just to be close to her and then not moving back when she did not move herself.
This is obsessive and controlling behavior – and to a large extent you have brought this on yourself. You made yourself into a security blanket and a piggy bank without having things clear between you – and as such you have made some seriously abnormal behavior patterns for your friendship.
I think you will have to accept that the money you have invested in her are gone. (Unless it was very clear that you were loaning her money)
Please take this as a learning experience. You can not demand love for money. She gave you what she had companionship and “friendship”. That I feel that she was misusing you and to some extend manipulating you for money – is to some degree due to your own readiness to give her money for what you thought (maybe subconsciously) was love.
I hope all the best – this is a difficult situation to experience.
Nagging someone to clean is not the same as hitting someone. So whenever someone has a lazy partner we should just do it all ourselves because they may feel sad if we tell them to clean
Nagging someone to clean is not the same as hitting someone. So whenever someone has a lazy partner we should just do it all ourselves because they may feel sad if we tell them to clean
I would just let it go. 8 months is long enough that you deserved a better break up than this, but not so long that you should allow it to be a huge stopping point in your life if it didn't work out. My guess with you being out of town is that he got jealous and paranoid, and probably decided in his own mind you falling asleep instead of answering meant something more was going on than actually was.
I might, if it were me, send a parting note that says “Going to block you now so you don't have another paranoid delusional fit and message me with more vague and baseless accusations. You really need some therapy before you date again because your insecurities are on a hair trigger and you're not going to be able to make anything work with anyone if you self-destruct every time someone falls asleep before sending you a “good night”. Good luck- you're going to need it.” and then block him on everything. Make sure you change the locks for good measure, too.
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Maybe you should cut back on your hours and ask your wife to get a job to fill in the gaps, you're working yourself to death dude
She has expressed that we don't do enough social activities. So I'm totally open to that.
The plan was to get married and have kids. I'm completely open to working with her to be more social but we moved during covid to a new state & city and bought a house in the suburbs. I've even expressed that we can sell this house in a year or so and move into the city.
Create a chore chart, divide the chores up, and have an agreement that they'll all be done by a certain day each week.
Leavin u on read all the time
I was diagnosed a few years ago after a very toxic relationship and break up.
Obviously, but you recognize that that’s your issue. Your husband hasn’t done anything wrong in this case. He’s got a fetish but otherwise respects you and honors your wishes in a loving consensual relationship.
Did she admit to what she did? Or only that she made a mistake by leaving?
This is not an issues with two sides to be carefully evaluated, like PlayStation vs Xbox. For most people, this is a simple right vs wrong argument. You both took marriage vows. You agreed to forsake all others. He now wants to rewrite that to his convenience, at the expense of you. For most people, that would result in a simple “no thank-you, here are the divorce papers”.
Just out of curiosity, does your parents not work?
Is his “trauma” why he wants you to have a cosmetic tummy tuck and boob lift, too?
He is lying through his teeth. I hope you will get the courage to take control of your own life before he destroys your beautiful kids.
I’m a bi woman who came out after marrying a whole man and having a child. At no point did I come out so I could fuck around on my marriage; I did it because I trust my husband to know this part of me.
Unless she told you she wants to date women, you had nothing to worry about. She’s with you, that’s it. I would work on your biphobia though, that will kill your relationship faster than you can blink.
Maybe she thinks she needs she has to buy your affection? You should have a nice talk with her and explain that you’re happy to be her friend just for the sake of being friends.
I get both sides of this, though one thing is true: what you wear is not up to anyone but YOU. Guys hear other men ogling and saying sexual things about random women all the time, and so they hate the thought of other men saying nasty shit to their buddies about you. It’s easier to not think about as a woman because we don’t hear the objectifying crap they say about us regularly. We can certainly imagine it because we’ve heard worse, but it doesn’t feel like a certainty because we’re not in the same conversations.
Wearing her daughter's boyfriend's shirts is weird as hell but you need to look into the whole 'leaving them at your house' thing. Because maybe it's less worse than we all think and those shirts have genuinely been left there for a long time and she might have decided she might as well ''steal'' them and start using them since no one bothered to take them back
Do you really want to stay in a relationship where your partner is throwing shit at you over FUCKING socks!
Why do you think so? Have you been through this?
She doesn’t like the way he’s playing and doesn’t like being called that. How is it playful if she doesn’t like being called that? Would you feel the same way if she was calling him dick head and he didn’t like the nickname but she kept calling him that even though he has said multiple times he doesn’t like being called that? Jesus how very hot is it to compromise and call her something else more to her liking?!!
Why not actually communicate? Eye rolling is extremely childish passive aggressive behaviour that is very common in abusive relationships.
In my entire adult life I have only known 2 adults who still rolled their eyes and they both had BPD and were very abusive.
They both sound extremely childish no matter how you look at it.
Ummmm, your BF is a controlling ass. It's probably his insecurity, but let me promise you that relationships that start this way ONLY get worse. He is a misogynist.
Why the hell is he discussing your behavior at all? He is not your parent. There are so many red flags here.
If he doesn't like you for who you are with no editing he can f-off. Don't let this man control you, it will make you miserable.
All you can do is work on yourself! This time apart will be good for both of you.
Yes my service will end shortly after. Much appreciated, thank you!
I feel your pain. Several years ago we went to dinner for my birthday with a group and f friends. She told the restaurant it was my Bday. They gave me a free dessert. She ordered what she wanted, a dessert I have never once ordered.
Here in the cold the minimun is -1°C. Not as cold as in the north hemisphere, but at the same time in the northeast states or Rio the weather will be like 25° lol
For them, taking bath twice a day is a must. For us down in the south, once is enough. But I still think that if you take bath every other day, the intimate parts will smell a little, or not? I was never in such cold weather, so I don't know, but I can totally see why you wouldn't want to take a bath in these conditions.
She's allowed to say no. Do you feel like you are entitled to sex every time you seek it?
My cat only went on the sofa when I told him to. They can understand.
It's not a thing of feeling sorry for him, but financially it'd be comfortable for him and even more for me.
If you're not actually a bank, don't give loans or financial support to legal strangers.
If he's 40k in debt, are you happy to have that associated with your own financial record?
I dont see what good would come from telling her that you snooped on her phone, apart from getting it off your chest. Suffice to say, this is an area you want to work on together regardless of that fact. Stop making the situation worse for yourself.
Try not to compare yourself to others. Your wife chose you for a reason. The performance anxiety that you place on yourself is a large part of the problem.
Consider using toys in the bedroom. This is a normal thing, and can make you feel better about providing for your partner's needs.
The patents on the generic forms of viagra and cialis expired a while ago. They are super inexpensive and you can get them through on-line pharmacies, so you dont even have to go to your doctor. You should still talk to your doctor about the issue anyway.
They acting like he tried to strangle her
Well then you don't get into a relationship with someone from another country. If my partner had even thought of saying my family from abroad couldn't visit I wouldn't have continued the relationship. Staying in a hotel isn't really the same, especially if they don't have a hotel next door. I like being able to share meals and late nights with my family for the few days a year I see them, it balances out my local in laws we see more often for shorter periods.
Thank you 🙂 I feel a bit less “crazy” now
Exactly and don't tie yourself to a family that makes such demands by moving onto their grounds. Each time he'll want something hell remind you that you are living on his land
Probably, but never underestimate human stupidity, that's my philosophy.
Put some washing up liquid and a kettle full of boiling water in there. After 20 mins it will be much easier to deal with.
But he needs to see a nutritionist and a psychologist to fix the real problems here.
Jealousy is a relationship killer. You have a good lady there, she's standing up for herself. This is a professional social battle for her, if you step in you are taking away her lesson she needs to learn.
As we on-line life society imposes on us wanted and unwanted things, being able to summon the strength to handle things like this is special. If someone does it for her it will lower her self esteem. If she handles it she feels more confident.
If you step in she will see you as controlling, like a parent that doesn't have faith in her abilities. She won't have experienced what it's like to fight for your relationship. I would only step in if she is blatantly asking for help and needs you.
If it was me I would let her deal with it while focusing on myself and how this is impacting my ability to stay centered.
Sounds like he's getting redpilled from social media videos tbh
Wanting children is like, THE thing a couple has to agree on if the relationship is destined to work.
It's ok to break it off and both of you find people that feel the same way. I love my ex girlfriend to death (and we are still great platonic friends now), but the moment I found out she didn't want kids and she found out I did, we ripped the band aid off right then. It was brutal at the time, but years later I'm married with a beautiful daughter and she's in a serious relationship with another “never offspring”, and we couldn't be happier for each other.
But neither of you are going to be happy if you stick together. One of you is going to resent the other, and the one being resented is going to feel it and not like it.
I don't understand the question
You aren't responsible for rebuilding the trust that he broke and that's where your problem lays – he is not apologetic and I highly doubt he has done anything to actually demonstrate his trustworthiness. He has done nothing to earn your trust back. So long as that goes on, odds are you won't ever trust him and that's definitely something that takes a toll on a relationship.
Oh yes, break up with him. Go to the police. Don’t wait. If you wait, he will string you along with promises to pay you back. He will not pay you back. With a little pressure from the police, he might be able to get your money from family.
He is always going to have financial problems. He will continue to steal from you if you stay with him.
You need to catch her in the act. You can trust but you need to verify.
Its less her personality and more that she doesn’t like you.
It doesn't sound like this person was ever your friend, and frankly, I'd be concerned how he got your contact details. However, you aren't obliged to be his friend. If he's making you uncomfortable, you can absolutely block him, and don't feel bad about it. You have a responsibility to your own mental health.
She’s a SAHM…why you paying for extra childcare? So that your wife has more time to drum up more random shit to be angry about?
Tell us about her family. Do you know her dad? Mom? How was she raised? Does she have a good relationship with them?
Tbh i could answer these lol but trying not to. I think she has issues that needs therapy so she can go look for healthy relationships.
And honestly you too. This aint it for either of you.
So, you think there aren't dangers in doing this? You think bringing a new person into a currently monogamous relationship isn't filled with danger? Hold up. I'm going to grab some links from r/infidelity. This shouldn't take long.
I always find it amusing when people put forward self righteousness comments like this. It is proven that the waste majority of people do the things they want if they can get away with it. Your comment just proves the point.
It has been proven that people that like to write nasty and trollish comments on social media are far more likely to from personality disorders like narcissism and sociopathy. So before you start commenting next time I suggest think about the biblical quote “let him without sin cast the first stone”.
Why would you block and unblock? And let this go on for a year??
Just move on with your life.
I'm offended and terrified that he really believes that about me
Yes, he believes this about every single human on the planet that are not evangelical christian. Can you imagine that only evangelical christians make it to heaven even when jesus was born a Jew? But Jewish people will burn in hell. Muslims. Buddhist. Hindus. Most likely Catholic and Methodist according to his beliefs. Etc.
Honestly I would be surprised if the relationship could ever get to a point where he would propose to you. His family and church would likely pressure him to break up with a 'sinner' who doesn't have their same beliefs.
This is a window into the very small, very hateful, very constricted life he lives. Worshipping a god that only loves a very, very, very small number of people on the planet regardless of the fact that the bible supposedly teaches 'our god is a loving god' and that Jesus taught tolerance and acceptance for all.
Get a new best friend or date your best friend.
Sorry best friend being a straight guy…RED FLAG
Oooph that edit. Check the date of when he bought that ring too in case it's some weird thing he just bought.
To me, someone bringing up they were going to propose while there is a disagreement always feels oddly manipulative. I don't know, it just ruins the idea of it and especially if y'all haven't talked on it.
You know your boundaries and what you deserve. I hope things can be talked out
So he shouldn’t even try to work things out? One lie and he should throw 3 years down the drain and break up his family. Maybe they can work this out. Why does everyone on this sub give such shitty advice and respond to everything with break up and get therapy.
This is probably right. Fiance tells her that he will cut back time with Jack and tells Jack that he will get the girlfriend to calm down.
Very two-faced and dishonest to both. I found that when someone is dishonest it runs through their life, not just the current situation.
No she is not contrite, she is lying, gaslighting you and this will go underground…..stop allowing her to control the narrative….get ahold of his number and call him and tell you will personal come to his house and show his wife the messages…take control of the situations and get angry….some people
Exactly this, she married some dude in who's still in his party phase who also doesn't seem like he knows how to do that shit responsibly. Though she seems like she'd be right with him if not for the baby, even if not for the cheating, worse shit could have happened.
She’s already done with you, she’s mentally checked out, you go out clubbing nearly three days a week.
You say you check her phone as well yet you’re the only one who’s going clubbing every week.
Are you willing to pay the difference?
What you did wrong is have “several “ kids. How much is they 3? 9? 34? We don’t know. The fact is you don’t understand how much work multiple kids are too raise. 1 is fine 3 is harder 3 is like another universe. 4 is wow nuts. Yo just gloss over all this and it might be the reason your wife is so stressed. Multiple kids are a full time job.
That was a great comment and an example of an open communication. When I first met with my bf he was just broke up his long time crush. I listen his story with her and I liked his love to her. You know he is capable of showing his love to a wonderful woman. Their relationship was beautiful. Listening this didnt hurt me but opposite, I see his romantic side. Anyway after we got to know each other, he showed his love to me as I show to him. Now he feels wonderful things to me.
If he’s to small that sounds like a him problem. Run and find someone that will treat you right that’s bigger than a toothpick.
It's giving me wattpad vibes.
In the event it's real and not an attempt to end up an animated story on YT or tik tok, all of this is weird threatening behavior.
Normal people don't dangle bits of information out there. They have a life and they don't want to spend theirs a supporting character in your life. Someone with legit knowledge of cheating would just send the information to you via technology and move on.
At this point, Wannabe-Fisherman just wants to toy with you. I'd assume they are deranged and they will escalate in violence. So document it and get cameras so you can press charges and get some form of restraining order as it escalates.
This is important to Eastern European people especially, I believe. Your girlfriend is polish and she would’ve had a right to be upset… IF she communicated that this was something that was important to her, which she didn’t.
Then your fucked. Relationships cooked and you should end things. It’s that, or find a way to compromise. It’s wrong she put you in this position, but it’s the cards you’ve been dealt.
That sounds harsh but it's the truth…. I hope he sees how childish he sounds. I know I'm not perfect either. But I still tell him what's wrong.
I’ve gone through several therapist, I’m not currently seeing one, even though at this present moment I really need one. The County’s victim services are horrible. They really don’t care about victims honestly. To be honest, my best friend was really helping me through this, which makes this an even bigger slap in the face. Like losing her would create several wounds, but I have her right now and I’ve already been wounded. This is confusing and painful.
As long as he agrees that whatever you find in his pockets you're entitled to keep …
Years ago my mechanic Dad left $700 from a cashie job in his overalls pocket and Mum found it while doing laundry
Asked him a couple days later if he was missing anything and he said no don't think so?
So she's like … I guess I can keep this chunk then ay ??? hahaha he's done his own pockets ever since!
Note: She just thought it was hilarious to see how long it would take for him to notice lol she didn't keep the money ?
Time to leave. He's not going to look after the kids, he can't even look after himself.
This is why staying friends with ex'es is reserved for mature, sensible people. This is not an ex you can be friends with. Block her, do not contact her, life your life
Yes! This is amazing advice. Goalposts, and perhaps at the very least, you will put into perspective what raising a child in a healthy, stable home requires!
I don’t understand why people like him get into a committed relationship. Just stay effing single! So sorry.
But also, what is really so wrong with adults living with their parents/family if it’s a situation that all parties are happy with? Why should OP’s partner move out on his own if he gets along well with his mom and is helping to pay most of the bills? What if this is actually saving him money and will allow him to buy a home when he’s ready? And why should his mom have strangers move in with her to help cover rent when she can on-line with her son? Why are people imposing this rule that you haven’t really started your life or that you aren’t a “real” adult if you’ve never left home (especially since OP indicated that her boyfriend pays most of the bills). Why do people want strangers to struggle financially to prove they’re “independent” and aren’t in some “unhealthy, co-dependent” relationship with family. Meanwhile, so many millennials are struggling just to pay rent just to live alone, or, alternatively, are living with a bunch of roommates that they hate (not everyone hates their roommates, but many do).
So there’s a lot of nuance missing from OP’s post. Should OP break up with the guy if she doesn’t like his living situation and relationship with his mom? Sure. She can go live! her own life and find someone else. Maybe her cultural beliefs and lifestyle just don’t align well with her boyfriend’s. But should we be imposing our own judgement on OP’s boyfriend without actually knowing the full context of the situation? Hell no.
You and him are not compatible. You can't give him what he wants out of this relationship. He wants someone who can accept his touch. You can't change yourself. Time to end it as it will lead to resentment and bitterness
You didn't know bad sex was a thing…? Consider yourself lucky
Fair enough, that's why I am here. She does. It just feels suggestive and freaked me out a bit
Sleeping separately can give someone the space needed to decompress after an argument. I used to follow my ex around wanting resolution and it made things worse. When I started sleeping downstairs, we could chill and regroup the next morning.
The issue is the frequency of these arguments, you need to get to the bottom of that.
Did you ask him point blank if he had a gf after you unblocked him and he got in touch with you? If not then you are kinda playing yourself arent you?
I really wish I’d gotten the chance to have more sexual partners.
But… you did have the chance. You had YEARS. And all you did is sext and flirt and then only slept with one.
You have quite serious intimacy issues if sexting is all you ever actually get to, if you can only actually do “the hunt” and not past that. I think for your own good you need to get into what the deal is with a professional. Not just for your gf but because something is going on with you that's going to affect things for the rest of your life.
I was you from 18-23. I didn’t have a kid with him but pretty much all of what you said. He told me I was crazy, I was paranoid, I was lonely, etc. if it wasn’t for him traveling to OR I would’ve thought you were talking about my ex who is from OR lol
Please don’t accept this, try to think of a way out. I left at 23 and he still managed to be inside my head until 2 years ago. He managed to have me ruin an amazing relationship with my ex who was a doctor and kind soul. Luckily 2 years ago I met my husband who truly showed me what love is. After I met my husband… easiest block of my life . I realized how POS my first ex was.
Leave
She has no way to contact him it sounds like
I would tell your mom first. Tell her you know, tell her about how it helped you and you think it might help others. I think it would be very important for her to tell your siblings over you. We don’t know exactly why she withheld the full truth – fear? Regret? embarrassment? I would tell her first.
Look. If little issues are constantly popping up and creating bigger problems it's not petty things. It's big underlying problems.
If you were mostly rescheduling the dates because you were too tired, and now are physically repulsed by him, there's something your body is picking up on that means you don't want to be with him. Trust your body.
How about a sex therapist? You’ve made a lot of demands. It’s a nuclear why, 4 years ago, you decided that the sex life you’d always enjoyed was no longer good enough. Now, as you pointed out, you’re going to see any effort she makes as forced.
You don’t want sex today in part bc you couldn’t keep it up last time.
You’re blaming her for everything wrong with your sex life, but it sounds like she also isn’t satisfied.
This appears to be about way more than the sex. I think therapy is your only hope.
Babys mama
he said without missing a beat that he also made one for me but when I asked him that please show me he said he would show me later and then when I asked him later for it he said he didn't make it yet and tried change the topic.
He literally lied to you right here
Not sure why you want him around. You're not stupid. Don't let him gaslight you.
Have some self respect and dump your trash.
He’s not a good man. Stop protecting him. Stop taking responsibility for him. Divorce him and let him sort his own shit out.
Just lie. Say you aren't feeling a connection or be slightly more honest and say you arent feeling an attraction.
Why is she pissed at u? Did her acct get hacked?
More like an extreme form of it