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Model from: cn
Languages: en,zh
Birth Date: 2001-08-01
Body Type: bodyTypeThin
Ethnicity: ethnicityAsian
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBrown
Subculture: subcultureStudent
Date: February 23, 2023
She repeatedly asked you to stop and you repeatedly ignore her. Affection isn't what you are showing. Dominance is and she is over it.
“Look, husband, you telling me that you are no longer attracted to me after you got me pregnant is one of the most juvenile, immature, fucked up things you could ever say to me. It is humiliating that I married someone who thinks like a 14-year old boy. So we will get through this, and I expect you to help me with things as I get closer to delivery. After I deliver, I will take the time that I need to recover, and then you can move out. In the meantime, you do not need to worry about being attracted to my body ever again. After the children are born, and some sort of routine is established, you can feel free to move out, and go find someone with a body more to your liking. While I will see about finding a man I can build a life with after we divorce. But please, stop acting like our marriage can recover from this with a little counseling — you don't seem to understand, I don't want a relationship with someone as shallow as you. You are not the man I thought you were. I don't want to be married to someone who thinks the way you do, who sees nothing wrong with impregnating a woman and then telling her she is no longer attractive when she is at the most vulnerable part of her life. I deserve better, and I know I can do better. So stop acting like this is just a temporary problem, when the reality is, our marriage is over.”
Yeah, you're gonna wanna try and work through this.
Just tell him no. That’s the only advice.
First, is it possible he might see one of your videos? I don't think you want him finding out that way? Second, I'll admit that this would be a deal breaker for me so I'd want to know sooner rather than later so we can both move on.
He is not worth your efforts. Being in a relationship is meeting each other’s needs. He is selfish. Find someone worthy of your efforts and that will appreciate you and fulfill your needs.
Let's just say I wouldn't put much weight on his opinions about his financial resources…
Pedro the Pedo lol.
If you are talking about Oral sex, or using your hands or to get him off-that’s not really ‘no sex’.
But anyway, you can talk about it with him, but i would be surprised if this saved the relationship. I doubt you will really want to keep it up (so to speak) and will start resenting the effort it requires on your part very soon. And he will likely feel guilty over asking you to do something you see as a chore.
A dramatically mismatched libido is a good reason to break up. It would be different if he wanted it daily and you wanted it weekly. Or he wanted it weekly and you wanted it monthly. But sexual passion is just a huge part of being in a romantic relationship for people with high libidos, and I suspect you just want different things.
I am not sure why you consider an abuser to not admit abuse is crazy, but the odds that you are not also abused in some way are zero.
You should talk to him about it, ask if he went to therapy or something, but have a bag packed.
Stop doing that for a bit and see what happens.
It sounds like you two aren’t aligned when it comes to money. It’s time to have a deeper conversation about such things now that you’re thinking about getting engaged. Maybe this ring thing is an outlier that she values (maybe her matriarchal line each passes a valuable ring down the line and she wants to do the same) and she’s much more reasonable and aligned with you about financial planning and priorities. Maybe she extremely sexist and materialistic and transactional, and thinks your role in the relationship is to spoil her as her sugar daddy. Or somewhere in between.
Yeah, and where is data from?
You need someone older, like close to your age. It is a bit odd being dating someone so young.
He just doesn't show up when she's going to be there. He can attend things when she's not. If they're choosing her over him, he's not losing anything he needs. Not making himself a target doesn't mean he has to isolate himself. He can go hang with his friends instead.
Then your prejudice matters more than the person you married.
Start the process of getting a divorce and find someone who fits your rigid mold of what a woman “should be”.
He hasn't been the least bit sneaky, you lunatic. The whole post is based on the fact that he's not at all sneaky.
Nobody here said “but it IS ok for him to treat you like shit!” You made that up because you're mad that you were told you're being a dick.
I don’t want him to get arrested and have a criminal record.
Ma'am, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but, You're wrong. You do want him to be arrested and have a criminal record, because that is what he deserves for hitting you.
And it’s very rare that one of the people wouldn’t pounce on the opportunity were it to present itself again. So often one of the two people in a “platonic” relationship would go further given the opportunity, it’s all built on bullshit. Rare cases yeah it’s true and works out, but there’s a snake in the grass more often than not.
Religion is a topic that is often discussed with more emotion than reason. People can get dug in because religious beliefs are very much intertwined with who we are as individuals and how someone sees themselves and the world. Could you both go to a 3rd party authority on the matter for a discussion?
An aside, the reason Baptists don't practice the sprinkling of infants is because the practice of their faith is rooted in what the Bible says, not just avoiding things prohibited in the Bible. There is no passage of scripture that instructs baptisms by sprinkling infants, only by full immersion (which might be where your BF's understanding comes from, since that's how Jesus was baptized). Secondly, they only baptize those that can profess their faith, which infants cannot.
Tl dr should read; I asked a question that had potential to hurt my feelings, and it did.
He's mad because you set him the fuck up lol. Sorry but good luck getting him to open up again now.
Was it a credit limit or was it her debit card and she didn't realize the bill was going to be that much?
No
I'm forgetful in the same way. Cracks my husband up when I say the wrong age. Appointments, reminders to take pills, etc all get put in my phone or they don't exist. They just don't fully register in my brain as something important enough to remember.
I'm forgetful in the same way. Cracks my husband up when I say the wrong age. Appointments, reminders to take pills, etc all get put in my phone or they don't exist. They just don't fully register in my brain as something important enough to remember.
I mean he’s right. You’re not married. If you aren’t already, move in together and see what it’s like living together. If you are already living together, be patient. Also it’s OK to feel hurt and disappointed because your hopes were up but try not to show him that you’re upset. Just try to be understanding. At least he told you why he didn’t think it was a good idea. You might thank him later down the road in case issues pop up in the relationship.
Honestly it probably never stopped OP, she just got better at hiding. How often do the three of them hang out together without you?
He doesn’t need a girlfriend he needs to go and live with his mummy.
Why are you even contemplating this?
Tell him to grow up and find yourself an adult to date not this needy child.
Yes 6. He claims to have risky sex with other women without also offering an std panel
It takes a victim of abuse on average 7 attempts to leave their abuser.
OP making a post about her relationship is really not that surprising.
Plus (and consult your attorney on this), getting her fired right now could affect the divorce proceedings. Better to have her gainfully employed for now, lest she claim some kind of alimony. Even if she was responsble for her own ruined career, a judge may look at the basic facts of her employment status in awarding some form of alimony. Your attorney will know the local jurisdiction and practice much better.
For the love of God stop dating. Just stop. You are not in a good place to be choosing partners. You need to work on you and keeping your child safe. Your bringing men like this around your offspring. Just stop. It's time to stop.
What? She is refusing to use insurance? That's absurd! This refusal could be an aspect of her mental health issues. There's no reason to keep it from her medical records (though she already has medical records so…)
As tactfully as a confrontation can go. Pick a moment when you’re both calm and relaxed and tell her you need to discuss with her something. Express that you’re worried that it might get uncomfortable and state that you’re goal is to share your feelings and have an open conversation. And then just tell her that you found she’s been tracking you against your will and that you would like her to explain what emotions or concerns drove her to do this without your knowledge.
I would avoid language like “behind my back”, “consent”, “violation of privacy”. Not because they’re not true but because the connotation is rather negative and cam across as accusatory. Instead use “without my knowledge”, “in spite of our previous conversation”, etc.
I'm not saying that OP 'should' let his parents in but maybe the therapist knows more about the situation than the 3 paragraph reddit post we have just read. They 'may' also be better qualified to judge the situation than we are.