I get you girls point, of course it is better let our bodies with its natural cycle, but like one of you said, it's not the same as being poisoned. Maybe OP's girlfriend should have other non hormonale method like IUD if she feels worried about pills.
So, this is the thing. He likes her. They have a nice thing going. She doesn't appear to be an asshole or a cheater. There are a lot of grey areas in life. I don't really know what to tell you, life is long and the lines aren't always straight.
Birth is a medical procedure, not a spectator sport. If I was under the impression (and not unreasonably so at all, she had absolutely no reason to believe otherwise) that my partner had just cheated on me, I would want him to be present when I was extremely vulnerable and in a lot of pain. I get you have not given birth so you may not understand but if your body cannot relax because you feel unsafe or stressed, it can cause serious complications. For the safety of your son and girlfriend, it was best you were not present. If you want to continue to prioritize your hurt feelings over their safety, that’s up to you.
Either he’s ghosting bc he believes you did something, or…he wanted to break up and is manipulating the situation by making you think it’s the first option.
The second one is fucked up and I’m sorry to say it happens. The guy I know would say darkly, ominously, “I don’t want to talk about it, but she knows why we aren’t together”. Turns out he was cheating and decided to be with the other girl, and this was his master plan to avoid accountability.
If I got her a puppy, it'd be one more thing that I would end up having to take care of. I'm worried that this is less therapy for her and more her latching onto someone.
Yes you would. You nearly did hurt her when you threw all that shit at her. Alcohol is not to blame. There's not enough alcohol in the world to make me throw something at another person let alone the “love of my life”. It's really no wonder you've been married 3 times and if your girlfriend had any self-respect she'd leave your ass the next day. You gotta make a change man. It starts with one day.
OP, celebrate yourself. You've earned a great deal of self-congratulations!
Write your brother a letter/email stating, “I will be otherwise engaged that day because I also have something to celebrate that means a great deal to me, I wish you and your bride every happiness.”
Send a card. If you're feeling generous, send a bottle of wine and a picture of your graduation day.
You've achieved so much! Do not let anyone take that away from you.
If you feel as if people are asking after your family, tell them your family had an engagement they did nt want to miss, and smile.
Damn. Dude is in his 30s. That’s a trope that belongs in the movies. Even if I won the lottery, I wouldn’t do that at my old bad job just because of how paranoid I am about it blowing up in my face.
I'm perhaps out of touch, but it's shocking to me the positions that reddit takes on things.
Have small breasts? You go girl! Some guys like them!
Have a small dick? NO ONE MUST EVER ACKNOWLEDGE IT EVER, AND IF THEY DO, YOU NEED TO DUMP THEM!
As I said, OP needs to get over himself and just own it. Quit trying to gaslight his GF into living the farce that he has a massive dick when he clearly doesn't.
I was much more hurt that she had cheated on me, which she had always denied.
this was the moment you should have dumped her. But wait, it gets worse
…..
Recently it was my girlfriend's birthday, she had made me promise her twice that I wouldn't buy her anything. Instead of that, I wrote her a song and played it for her on her birthday, including translation of the lyrics to her language (which I don't speak) telling how much I love her eyes, how she makes my day bright and all that.
The next day I called her three times and when she finally picked up she still said “I'm fine”, then an hour later she texts me saying to “not bring anything from the trip because you skipped my birthday, don't call me either”.
this is your other wake-up call to dump her. Are you going to do it this time, or are you going to spend your life with a 40 year old cheater, who's also a liar, and behaves like a 12 year old? Just asking…
I think he's putting her feelings above his own and ours for the sake of his child and relationship with the mother of his child, I don't doubt his feelings for me, he has always made it clear where he stood on that and I've communicated the same, I want the best for him and if that's not me and I want for us to be good friends how things started
Killing someone else’s baby without talking to them doesn’t make you a very good partner does it?
By your logic a man should be able to unilaterally decide he doesn’t want to pay child support then if a woman does choose to keep the baby. No more taking deadbeat dads to court
Thank you for this thoughtful response. Your words are really reverberating in my head right now. I know all your wrote was true, and this has been eating me up for years. Very much appreciated.
If you date someone who makes her decision while listenig to a snake doctor, you shouldn't be with this person.
I get you girls point, of course it is better let our bodies with its natural cycle, but like one of you said, it's not the same as being poisoned. Maybe OP's girlfriend should have other non hormonale method like IUD if she feels worried about pills.
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So, this is the thing. He likes her. They have a nice thing going. She doesn't appear to be an asshole or a cheater. There are a lot of grey areas in life. I don't really know what to tell you, life is long and the lines aren't always straight.
Birth is a medical procedure, not a spectator sport. If I was under the impression (and not unreasonably so at all, she had absolutely no reason to believe otherwise) that my partner had just cheated on me, I would want him to be present when I was extremely vulnerable and in a lot of pain. I get you have not given birth so you may not understand but if your body cannot relax because you feel unsafe or stressed, it can cause serious complications. For the safety of your son and girlfriend, it was best you were not present. If you want to continue to prioritize your hurt feelings over their safety, that’s up to you.
UpdateMe!
Either he’s ghosting bc he believes you did something, or…he wanted to break up and is manipulating the situation by making you think it’s the first option.
The second one is fucked up and I’m sorry to say it happens. The guy I know would say darkly, ominously, “I don’t want to talk about it, but she knows why we aren’t together”. Turns out he was cheating and decided to be with the other girl, and this was his master plan to avoid accountability.
People can be assholes.
Honey, that’s a big booty Judy that left those behind.
So they haven't tried taking the computer away? lmao.
If I got her a puppy, it'd be one more thing that I would end up having to take care of. I'm worried that this is less therapy for her and more her latching onto someone.
She dodged you as a bullet, imo
> I’d never actually hurt her.
Yes you would. You nearly did hurt her when you threw all that shit at her. Alcohol is not to blame. There's not enough alcohol in the world to make me throw something at another person let alone the “love of my life”. It's really no wonder you've been married 3 times and if your girlfriend had any self-respect she'd leave your ass the next day. You gotta make a change man. It starts with one day.
because he’s out with his cousin. It’s totally normal. Was the girl not his cousin?
Tracking your partners location is really fucking crazy
OP, celebrate yourself. You've earned a great deal of self-congratulations!
Write your brother a letter/email stating, “I will be otherwise engaged that day because I also have something to celebrate that means a great deal to me, I wish you and your bride every happiness.”
Send a card. If you're feeling generous, send a bottle of wine and a picture of your graduation day.
You've achieved so much! Do not let anyone take that away from you.
If you feel as if people are asking after your family, tell them your family had an engagement they did nt want to miss, and smile.
I find a smile stops questions happening.
Well, you should stop playing FIFA and start cheating, since cheating is preferable
Damn. Dude is in his 30s. That’s a trope that belongs in the movies. Even if I won the lottery, I wouldn’t do that at my old bad job just because of how paranoid I am about it blowing up in my face.
I'm perhaps out of touch, but it's shocking to me the positions that reddit takes on things.
Have small breasts? You go girl! Some guys like them!
Have a small dick? NO ONE MUST EVER ACKNOWLEDGE IT EVER, AND IF THEY DO, YOU NEED TO DUMP THEM!
As I said, OP needs to get over himself and just own it. Quit trying to gaslight his GF into living the farce that he has a massive dick when he clearly doesn't.
I was much more hurt that she had cheated on me, which she had always denied.
this was the moment you should have dumped her. But wait, it gets worse
…..
Recently it was my girlfriend's birthday, she had made me promise her twice that I wouldn't buy her anything. Instead of that, I wrote her a song and played it for her on her birthday, including translation of the lyrics to her language (which I don't speak) telling how much I love her eyes, how she makes my day bright and all that.
The next day I called her three times and when she finally picked up she still said “I'm fine”, then an hour later she texts me saying to “not bring anything from the trip because you skipped my birthday, don't call me either”.
this is your other wake-up call to dump her. Are you going to do it this time, or are you going to spend your life with a 40 year old cheater, who's also a liar, and behaves like a 12 year old? Just asking…
No
Reread your post but change the title to (43M).
I think he's putting her feelings above his own and ours for the sake of his child and relationship with the mother of his child, I don't doubt his feelings for me, he has always made it clear where he stood on that and I've communicated the same, I want the best for him and if that's not me and I want for us to be good friends how things started
“Partnership”
Killing someone else’s baby without talking to them doesn’t make you a very good partner does it?
By your logic a man should be able to unilaterally decide he doesn’t want to pay child support then if a woman does choose to keep the baby. No more taking deadbeat dads to court
we’ve talked about in the past how long distance isn’t something either of us want. so the planning to breakup with me hits hot.
Thank you for this thoughtful response. Your words are really reverberating in my head right now. I know all your wrote was true, and this has been eating me up for years. Very much appreciated.
Thats how you tell hes a gutless prick.