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Let’s make this pussy cum! , ❤❤ [2674 tokens remaining]
Date: December 2, 2022
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Fuck, it's a tough spot. I know it's easy for reddit to demand you blow up friendships, but it's way harder in real life. Trust me, I know that for a FACT. There are two things here that I keep coming back to. Once is that it's been over half the fucking relationship, and within the last six months. This isn't going to magically go away, and her “I feel bad for doing this to him” smells like complete fucking bullshit to me. That's how you feel after a drunken one-night-stand, not ongoing affairs. The other is that she said “I know I would spiral if people found out.” This is her weaponizing her mental health against you. That way, she can manipulate you. In other words, she gets to “confess” to you, thereby making her feel better, and letting her pretend she's paying some sort of penalty (because you know). But she doesn't have to have ACTUAL penalties, because she's threatening you with what might happen to her if she is found out. That is a pretty fucking shitty thing to do, and it makes me think that she's more or less lying about that. Maybe she does vaguely feel bad, but meh.
I would do what another commenter said. Lay it out, tell her that you don't think you can keep lying for her, and that she needs to tell her fiance before they get married, or you will.
That will likely end her relationship, I know. And it may end your friendship. But if you don't, you'll just be there when she keeps cheating over and over again, telling you all about it, making you her accomplice. And she'll be coming to you for comfort when her husband finally catches her cheating, maybe after they have kids, and everything falls apart.
Used to be close as kids but no we don’t really talk often maybe once a year, and I assume she should I mean me and cousin have legit same last name ..
He has a serious drinking problem. The fact that he gets that drunk, and continues to get that drunk after peeing himself on multiple occasions, indicates that he can't stop. He needs to get himself into a support group and stop drinking altogether. And do not, b under any circumstances, willfully bring a baby into this until he's under control.
Never ever try to convince someone for something like this for having or not having, it will end up bad and the kid pays for it.. lots of examples here in reddit. Those are basic incompatibilities
That movie must have triggered past trauma.
Yes. I'm sorry.
People grow apart, and you realise the life you have isn’t the life you want. You need to talk to him about how you’re feeling.
You absolutely should break up with your GF. She deserves someone who is head over heels in love with her and isn't pining after someone else. She doesn't deserve to be second choice. You are absolutely wasting her time and that is what you should feel guilty about.
I think you should spend less time on social media.
One day you are going to either be in a far more demanding job/older and in poorer health in general. The reason I say this is because you'll be sad that you wasted this time in your youth with someone who is is basically a zombie.
In your 20s, make sure you are with someone who matches your sex drive/general zest for life. That shit doesn't last for ever and life changes fast.
Both his rush to marry and his yoyoing on the abortion are bad signs.
Both his rush to marry and his yoyoing on the abortion are bad signs.
How was what she did a mature fashion?
Omg???
“Hey any chance you would wanna go on an official date Friday?” That easy. Blunt up front communication.
Every single time? Even with uti’s? Be serious
Oh ffs! This is far too complicated to ever work – even if you weren’t still in your teens. Go your separate ways. Online your life, enjoy college without these ridiculous boundaries. If at some point, say 10 years, down the road you meet and things click, good for you. Otherwise there are plenty more fish in the sea.
I totally agree to a point it’s a bad situation I’m point out the POV from the opposite perspective. Which is when she was down he covered her and now that he is trying to enjoy life she has some reason not to hold him down.(I understand the reason is valid)
On to your next point we are now a society of 50-50. no more of the traditional roles so as much as you want to say it isn’t that is what we online in. Agree or disagree doesn’t matter it’s just facts and I think it’ll get worse as time moves on.
Personally I think the relationship is doomed regardless so all the advice is somewhat pointless.
I married into an insanely conservative, repressed, Irish Catholic family. I wish there was a way you and i could switch in laws, god I’d have loved this regardless of intent. Joke, serious, whatever.
There’s literally nothing anyone on Reddit can say to you about this without having additional context. That means you need to speak to your husband about this. Is this just how she is? Is she getting crazy over time? Did she think this was a hilarious prank? Is she the type of person who really just gives no fucks and would give this seriously?
Your reaction would depend on her motives, and no one knows those.
So there isn't any major issues. They know it's a lie, and you barely talk to your ex at all. Care to fill in the obvious missing details?
Cut them out bro
So you're pro life then?
Let her be dude. Online your own life.
It's absolutely a dealbreaker. I think I'm going to talk to his sister and ask her to help me sit him down and try talking him into trying therapy again. His last therapist was a terrible person. The word terrible doesn't really cover it. But he needs to get his trust back in therapy because it can work if you find the right person.
Please don‘t mutilate your child.
He’s a very superficial! I’m sure he’s a perfect example of a man! He probably has no flaws at all. This doesn’t sound like someone I would want to spend my life with.
No.
Exes are exes for a reason.
Thank you. Me too.
You aren't mature enough for a relationship. Hope she leaves you.
Start calling him “Pindick” and tell him it’s the best/only name that fits.
And you let him do this because…….????
Walk away. Your friend didn't like that you called her out. You have nothing to apologize for. She tried to shame you and in turn you point out the hypocrisy. Wait for her to come crawling back but just know that she will be trying to get back at you for your insight.
You don’t have to be with him forever. 3 months sounds like enough time to realize you deserve better
That happened in the US when that kind of record-keeping started to become more important, too. It was either a study by a life insurance company or the US census that I remember, where they found a disproportionate number of people reported being born in 1900 compared to 1899 or 1901, for example.
Because those 2 things are completely different. Not being chivalrous (or caring as some would view it) is a personality trait, the other (last name) is an identity trait. You can be a caring person and want to keep your identity traits, but you can’t be not caring and be a caring person if that makes sense? Your identity has no baring on your personality, but your personality has a baring on your personality obviously. So you can’t conflate the two.
For my personal situation, my wife does not have my last name. Would I have preferred her to have my last name? Maybe a tiny tiny amount, but when we discussed the topic she explained to me that it was important to her identity and culture (I’m white, she’s Indian) to keep her last name and it means a lot to her. I would’ve been a massive POS if I decided that my arbitrary reasons would’ve meant more to me than a variety of reasons for her. I would also be a POS if I went “I know you’ve always been the same person you’ve always been, but if you don’t take my last name then we’re done”. Like that’s just pathetic, you can’t force someone to change their last name for the reason of just tradition when it’s something very personal to their own identity. That’s what OP’s BF might want to do, and if that’s the case then bullet dodged.
OK so that's not what “crying wolf” means. That story is about someone who lies to get attention/their way/fun but nothing is wrong, and then when something actually goes wrong they don't believe the boy. What is happening here is she has expressed her (valid, real) emotions/feelings with a lot of crying and shouting, which is not healthy, but it is not lying. However her lack of control and ability to process emotions in a healthy manner has worn you down so freaking much that you now don't have much empathy left to give. She took it all and gave nothing in return. I have sadly been in this situation with my ex husband. If someone is on the street crying, I'll ask them what's wrong and if I can help. My ex husband had worn me down with his narcissist negativity for so long that I knew the relationship was over when he was crying in the bathroom and I didn't care. I felt freaking awful that I no longer cared that my supposed-partner was crying and I just couldn't bring myself to care anymore. When people have no idea how to handle their emotions and negativity, it will break down their partner to the point where there is nothing left.
Please let this be a troll. I’d like to maintain my naive hope that people like this don’t actually exist.
Sorry if I didn't explain properly, I don't financially support him – he makes his own money. I made the decision to purchase a house myself and want to ensure I keep this as my investment alone. He pays for his own stuff, but I do take care of all house related expenses – I'm luckily in a financial position that I don't need his input. He always pays for meals out (when we have them), his fair share of holidays, etc. We had a conversation before moving in together to set all this out and we agreed in this arrangement as it worked for us, that he's going after his dreams career wise (and doing well so far) so that he can support me when I'm ready to start my own business (I'm hoping to do so in the next 3-5 years). He's also started up an investment fund for us (which I have full access to) to purchase our dream house with some of the profits from his business so far.
I 100% agree with you on the chore front, and so does he – he is working on that one to be fair, but not at the pace I'd like!
Curious why you've posted photos of a woman, pretending to be her, multiple times in another subreddit? Enough that people have commented asking you why you're constantly posting those photos? You deleted your posts but not your comments on your posts. Oops?
You can give him a chance. You can tell him this isn't acceptable, he's being poisoned, and if he doesn't acknowledge that you deserve equal respect you're done.
I don't know how well it will go.
imagine a post with “i cant have sex with my gf, i’m repulsed with her pixie haircut” … the guy would get roasted to hell lmao
This is so wrong. What good does it do the son to think less of his father? Kids need to grow up confident of their parents. You will mess up the boys life by raising him to be ashamed of his father.
Trust me on this. This is the single biggest mistake unhappily married couples make, they disregard the effect on their children when they fight. Do not trash your spouse in front of your children, ever. You will destroy the kids own self image. You will hurt your kids more than your spouse. My mom did this, I know first hand. Your son will grow up and resent you for destroying his father. Using your kids as a weapon is petty and vindictive and in my opinion way more damaging in the long term. Every parent should be forced to hear this message. It is so unfair to the boy to destroy his father figure. End your marriage if you're unhappy, but let the son grow up confident and proud of his parents. He will find out the truth eventually, but he doesn't have to know now.
Don't victimblame you piece of shit. She was ABUSED and let down by the cultural environment.
oh no you aren't bitching. You are the insult troll. You throw the bait then you set the trap….good job.
Are u serious? Your poor ‘friend’
I have a heart condition too. What your BF is doing is causing you additional stress and it isn’t good for your condition.
For your own health, you should be with someone who doesn’t literally hurt you by causing you so much stress.
It's both but the original driving force of that hate was he set his sights on you first (so he thinks), and your bf ruined that.
UPDATE 2.0 He just packed a bag and left the house without talking to me further
I literally said from the beginning that it's reasonable for OP to feel fomo and anxiety. And to be fair he should get a month off at some point in the future too.
Its pretty clear you've never been in a successful long term relationship. The division of labour can't be exactly 50-50 every minute of every day. Sometimes one partner takes on more. Another time the other partner takes on more. That's what it means to be in a happy, healthy relationship where you're a team.
OP is more upset because of fomo than anything else. He's said so in his post, he's bummed that his husband will have a month of relaxation, quality family time, cheap booze and beaches while he's working and caring for their kid. Which is understandable we are all human. But his husband isn't selfish whichever way you wanna twist it.
Turning this into a me vs. you and calling his husband names is not going to help anyone, it'll just cause bitterness. Its them vs. the problem. And the solution is for OP to take an equivalent vacation some time in the future where his husband handles the responsibilities or work and their kid.
Hey, buddy, here we are, the next day. I generally try to check up on people after they express having a hot time in life a day after talking because it gives them some time to process their thoughts, so I'd like to ask how you're feeling about things today.
Not just a fully grown man but MULTIPLE fully grown men.
Look OP people are calling you an evil person for this. I'm not going to. I will just say though as soon as she started crying you should have let go.
It's clear to me that she thinks (or thought before you did this) that she has cheat codes on in this video game world. She is delusional if she thinks that. There are a million ways to get a “5'10″ and works out 2 times a week” girl off the streets and rape or even kill her. If she had a taser, and mace, and a pair of steel toed boots or even “6'6” and 260 of pure muscle on her, she MIGHT be alright. but she is not. at all.
Some people need to feel like they're in real danger in order to learn that nobody has Cheat Codes or respawn in life.
It seems like your BF is the type that goes by the “bros before hoes” lifestyle because when you look at his reaction and responses he is quick to believe them and completely blows you off or he makes excuses for them, like saying how his friend
was probably just looking out for him
It's also not a coincidence that his friends are being flirting with you at the same time, in my opinion; they must be plotting something together. They may be trying to drive a wedge between you and your boyfriend because they know he would defend them and always have their back. They also know that he accuses you of trying to create drama if you bring up the things they have done or said to you.
When they are openly trying to disrespect their so-called buddy's relationship, trying to get with their so-called friend's GF, and talking so much shit about their so-called friend, they don't seem like good people or friends. They talk about BF like the worthless piece of garbage that he is because they know BF won't believe you otherwise.
You really need to reevaluate this relationship. Do you really want to be with someone who gaslights and makes endless excuses for the toxic and manipulative people in their life?
This ⬆️ right here. Guys are visual, and watching porn does not equate to cheating. Also, guys compartmentalize their thinking, meaning they can watch porn, spank the monkey, and then be done. It doesn’t conflict with the relationship.
Thanks this is super helpful. My biggest issue is getting over my need to “solve it in the moment.” Taking space can cause me a lot of anxiety, but that's probably something I need to work on getting better at
EXACTLY THIS!!! Girl get far far away from this or you will not like where you end up.