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make me cum [161 tokens remaining]
Date: November 26, 2022
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he has a apartment now. I wanted to work things out but Idk if I should move on. I told him to block me so that I can't ever message him or he message me.
I love him so much. I never hurt him I never cheated on him. Idk why he cheated on me with her. He says he doesn't want to date her but why he did he had sex with her?
OP is gonna make excuses for him so its pointless to try and convince her. I've been literally black out drunk and I've never hurt an animal or anyone. Actually a trash person to do that.
Yes to all of this, especially the ultimatum. OP needs to ask her why he must consider her way, but she not consider his. A lifelong partnership is about so much more than a wedding day. If this is how she operates, she is not ready for marriage. OP needs to find all of this out now before he even proposes. They need to have some nude, thorough, complete conversations about their relationship. Communication is key.
Just say to her, “I don’t feel as if you want to be married to me and I know I don’t want to be married like this”. But first have a plan to leave/separate. If she wants to be in the marriage she’ll want to make an effort. When/if no effort is forthcoming you will eventually be much better off than in this hellhole limbo place you’re in.
I understand. I’m not “taking it away completely” I was very open in the beginning of our relationship about my past traumas and how it affected me. Also, about the sending song lyric thing, we constantly send each other music so that wasn’t just a random scapegoat to avoid actual communication. I do think you’re right that I need to work on some things in order to have a healthy relationship tho, I tend to be very emotional which is why I came here to get an outside perspective so thank you for that
Just send a polite text letting him know that you've decided to become exclusive with someone and wishing him well. You don't really owe him anything more than that since it's not a relationship.
I don’t understand, can you elaborate please?
Therapy is cheaper than a divorce.
You're not controlling he's just really bad at communication and apparently grasping reality.
I bet he has never said to his make fruends…… if u wasn't married. That right there defines stepping outside the norms of friendship.
Since he met her in class was the “friendship ” over when he completed the class?
Maybe he will. It's his prerogative. And if he does, it's because of a self-fulfilling prophecy on OP's part, not because he did anything wrong.
Do yourself a legitimate favour and get some therapy. You're wildly insecure and need help for it.
That's another good point, taking it to work suggest an addiction. I just really want to know what the context is. Is he catfishing, filtering website for girl on girl, subscribing to a specific women only site. She should be concerned.
My ex used to do this all under the guise of “finding me girls” (i identified as bi at the time, jk im actually just full on gay lol). He’d send them my nudes to get theirs, and push me to chat with them. It would take all of 2min for me to usually sniff out that these women were also men just catfishing for the same shit. Fucking insane. Men are diseased. This isn’t okay or normal, don’t be desensitized by it like I was. You deserve someone who loves you for you and doesn’t need to catfish for nudes live
Exactly. Then once they’re married, if his cover starts to get blown he’ll then suggest they have a baby.
Thank you! I always grew up thinking if a man stepped one toe out of line I’d be gone LoL. He has a habit of breaking things. My camera roll is full of it. He’s never actually hit’ me just blocked and picked me up against my will so I think I rationalized it.
What really hurts the most though is when we are together(which is so little) and I feel alone. There’s no touch or fun anymore that I get from him. and I absolutely want to just run away because it sucks so much.
Do all people IN THE MIDDLE OF SEX “EXPRESS” THAT THEY CHANGED THEIR MIND?
He physically shut down, stopped engaging, was limp, and sat on the side…. thats pretty expressive.
You’re wrong.
OP couldn’t perform and was incredibly vulnerable and ashamed. His GF didn’t wonder why he wasn’t participating? She couldn’t read his body language?
She either could and didn’t care or didn’t care enough to pay attention. I’m sure she didn’t want this to happen and it was an innocent mistake. But the blame is on her for continuing when OP wasn’t involved.
Ugh. It isn’t your job teach him these things. I would ask him to please read something or watch something about the bullsh!t we put up with as women. He should strive to have a better understanding of what people who don’t look like him deal with. It’s called empathy- and people who have it are better people, better partners, better leaders.
If he is this clueless with you imagine how he is with colleagues, service people, and future children. Not just daughters, we have to make sure future generations of men are raised with this awareness and stop excusing such bad behavior.
I’ve also done this and I feel guilt to this day about it but I never regret learning the circumstances of my narcissistic SO’s past violent incidents. But I do have to keep her on block to remain with my child’s father.
But then…that also leads me to the same thought… as long as you dont put any extra pressure on him with your codependence, everything else is up to him. While it might seem a bit cruel, i think the best way is to let him figure out home much time/interaction with you he needs.
Totally agree she should dump him.
Run away from this guy. He told his family when you didn't even have a definitive test. He decided your future without once stopping to even ask how you felt about the whole thing.
fr. hate to be the “if the roles were reversed!!!” kinda guy, but imagine if we were talking about a nineteen year old girl doing all the work for a 26yo man and now this man wants to convince her to raise a baby she doesn’t want… nah.
fr. hate to be the “if the roles were reversed!!!” kinda guy, but imagine if we were talking about a nineteen year old girl doing all the work for a 26yo man and now this man wants to convince her to raise a baby she doesn’t want… nah.
fr. hate to be the “if the roles were reversed!!!” kinda guy, but imagine if we were talking about a nineteen year old girl doing all the work for a 26yo man and now this man wants to convince her to raise a baby she doesn’t want… nah.
Not necessarily. But if he isn't even able to acknowledge that he ruined his first marriage by cheating to his new spouse, that seems like a huge problem to me. The guy is so guilt ridden about it that he practically pushes some really valuable assets on his ex-wife and doesn't even explain it.
How long will he think that he has to make up for his cheating to his ex-wife? And how will that effect his new relationship?
Tbh.: OP should give him an ultimatum to either start talking and explaining or she should be the one who leaves him. That guy is jumping from ruining one relationship to another.
she got pissed and told me to get her head off my shoulder. I didn’t and told her to be quiet
Yeah, prioritizing a total stranger's sleep over your girlfriend's feelings. Smart move bro.
Should I have pushed the girls head?
Of course you should have, weirdo!
It means you dodged a bullet and should be grateful.
Your GF is right, with a severely depressed parent that tried suicide (even though it failed), you are more at risk for depression and suicide. Parental suicide is unspoken approval for suicide to be an OK solution to depression. You admit do being depressed and there is nothing unmanly about asking for help. Think of it as an investment in your future and the future of any children you may have.
As to the strain of taking care of your father financially, have you sought federal assistance? He might qualify for SS benefits or even placement in an assisted living facility. Believe it or not, a lot of times, people who can’t take care of themselves independently often feel a kind of relief when they are with other adults in the same predicament. Speak to his doctor and a social worker/case manager regarding his options. Although you may feel like as his son, you should be providing care, given your circumstances, this is probably not the best solution for him. What happens if he needs you while you are out driving?
Lastly, try to funnel your altruistic drive into a little more socially acceptable volunteering. Suicide hotline? Animal shelter? The others are right, driving around at night searching for young girls who need a ride is a risky behavior. Besides possibly being accused of assault, there is also the risk of theft and bodily harm to yourself. It is not unheard of for an I’ll intentioned person to use a decoy to get to their victim. You pull over for the girl and the other person jumps into your car, not to mention, just because a person is female, doesn’t mean they themselves can’t be looking for some quick cash.
I am truly sorry about your father’s circumstances and admire your dedication towards helping him but in my nursing career, I have seen too many caregivers not take good enough care of themselves so that they,themselves, end up being in need of care.
He’s gay. Move on.
Divorce him. He’s gay and you’re his beard. You deserve a relationship with someone who wants you and will have sex with you.
Gnaaaaaaaah!
That test result doesn't say “you are half Asian”, so your mom or dad is Asian.”
It says: some genes present in you, individuum, are of Asian descent. They may have gotten innthere centuries back.
I've heard a lot about an emotional affair on this thread. What is that exactly?
if I start visiting family more frequently that is also a dealbreaker in the relationship
Leave him. This is toxic and extremely isolating and it's clear you are not happy there and him and his family should not be your sole source of comfort and happiness – it's weird. Explain to him that his controlling ultimatum has essentially pushed you away and you want to be back home with your family. I'm sure he seems lovely but anyone who tells you you cannot see your family more than 2x a year has concerning behaviors and doesn't want the best for you.
I'm from PA and my gf is from WI, as long as we/she can afford it, I've expressed to her that we will find all the time in the world for us to visit her family back there. THIS is the mentality he should have. Anything else is weird, controlling, and unhealthy. It ain't the love you think it is.
Make sure both of the kids are acutally yours
She's actually nude? Like boobie? Pfaff?
Actual nudity is actually terrible, lol dude, I'm sorry. Don't bring it up with her, bring it up with HIM.
I’m pretty pro gun but it sounds like your boyfriend is really scared and this was a panic reaction. Given the varying legality of carrying said gun on him when he goes out ( I’m guessing he wouldn’t be doing that) that only really leaves protecting the house. Maybe you can suggest so alternative options, things like better security for the house, deadbolts, those door wedges, a doorbell cam, etc. Seriously though this dude threatened to kill your Bf, that’s way past “clear the air” territory no matter how empty you think the threats are.
Alright so I was that girl at one point and I too was also in a relationship (still am years later) I was quite upset, but not because I still had feelings. When I was with my ex, he was a bit abusive towards the end but we had talked about marriage and kids ect. We were each others first. I know some question ” if he was abusive why are you upset?! ” it's because my insecurities/ thoughts immediately went to
*What did I do to deserve that? *Why didn't he love me like that? Am I not lovable? *Why wasn't I good enough?
Why I was upset wasn't exactly about my ex you see, but rather about myself because I 100% know for a fact I'd NEVER go back to a relationship that was abusive. Insecurities are one hell of a demon and sometimes we react in ways we normally wouldn't. This instance is just my personal experience, we will never know what your girlfriend was thinking.
You can either assume the worst and let your own thoughts about it shred your relationship or simply talk to her like an adult. Ask her what was on her mind or what caused her to be so distraught, ect.
Wasn’t this a post like 4 months ago? I’ll copy and paste my response from then because this shit is identical
She’s mourning the idea that he spent 4 years with her and didn’t wanna marry her. It’s painful to see someone who spent that long with you and refused to propose get married. She’s feeling hurt as a woman, not as an ex
No. I'm so sorry, my dear.
It's like getting blood from a stone.
It is just not there to give.
Get a new boyfriend who doesn't make you feel gross about your body.
Well, to be blunt – what changes if she continues to not have sex with you? It seems there may or may not by a physical reason why sex hurts, but she doesn’t seem to care to look into that and seems perfectly happy with your lack of a sex life. She doesn’t need or want it to change.
Thank you, I think im just overthinking
You should stop dating someone who doesn't respect you and your interests. She loves the person she thinks you will be after she is done fixing you.
This feels like a “tip of the iceberg” thing.
What else do you do to show her publicly that you love her and appreciate her?
Stop dating old ass dudes that want to control you. Good for you for finally standing up to him. Be glad he's gone.
I mean obviously he needs a bangmaid to raise his kids that he’ll never see either.
Like thousands? Lmao. What kinda question is that? Hand sanitizer kills germs and bacteria
She doesn't want to talk to me re prenup even though her money is from our dad and she's going to give half of it to hubby when he has done eff all. I said I'll still be her divorce lawyer at the end of the day but Im struggling to get past the hen/wedding in the first place