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sindy, y.o.
Location: United States
Room subject: getting ready for bed ;))
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms sindy
Date: November 23, 2022
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Nope nope nope it wasn't a mistake he was trying to keep up the pretence that he's single. There's only one reason for that.
I am seeking therapy and starting soon. I'm excited. Maybe my therapist will help me end this relationship once and for all too. Been tryna break up for 3 months now and he will not let go. I don't want to end up hating him in the end but it's starting to look like that. I wish he didn't have such a tight grasp on me.
Desperate times for desperate measures.
Realize your life will never be good again till you make up with ex boyfriend and run back to him!
Love, Ex boyfriend
He dumped you, why should you wait at all?
Yes
And that is was just an unnecessary comment or something along those lines
you feel that time is against her, but she clearly wants a second child. so you can either let her go to find someone that she can have a second child with or you can have a second child with her. she is not going to change her mind.
Yea Iv never said a bad word to her I’m always polite etc and she can be sometimes but it’s rare but that’s fine
It was how many times she said ‘well done’ I get it i got a job but it’s only a bar job in spoons that’s what I don’t get
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Yup. Especially if you just go with without compromise to avoid conflict. Set a precedent and expectation that can be unconscious but no less toxic. If someone is unwilling to compromise, bail.
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Tell him now.
I’m not sure what value you expect to get out of forcing someone to show their love for you in a way they aren’t comfortable with.
If you actually love your boyfriend, love him for the way he does show his love, not the way you want him to. Some people aren’t comfortable with writing and it’s likely he’ll get frustrated that he’s doing it wrong or not showing his emotion properly through that medium. Forcing him into it doesn’t help the situation.
If he’s a good boyfriend, he’ll show his affection for you without you having to tell him how to do it.
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Also, if he wasn't into me then why would he want to know if I had an orgasm after we had sex? He wouldn't care about that if he wasn't into me.
I know you're so right. I loved him no matter who he is, not many would. I guess he's sticking with me… fat and ugly and all because something is better than nothing.
It's a scam or she's homeless. Do NOT move in yet.
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You don't have to get snarky. I ended it and I'm really hurt.
Sex isn’t everything, but it’s an important thing. You would not be selfish to call it off. Do you want to be friend zoned for life?
I think she sees this as a commitment issue and thinks you’re at that stage where you’re more serious.
I think you need to decide at what stage you’ll introduce her. Saying “eventually” isn’t helpful to the other person in a relationship, as it might mean that you’re not willing to make it serious with them. I think a realistic, but firm timeline is the best idea.
I can understand you’re from a strict background, but it does seem like you’re allowing your dad a good amount of control. I don’t know whether you’re still in India, which is hard to advise if you are. But if you’re not, it’s totally ok to have boundaries within that relationship also.
It’s the truest of truths. If you care about your ex, you should leave him alone.
What kind of person casually throws out a request for a free pass? “I’d like to fuck someone else”. How did your brain not stop your mouth?
But they are technically hers since both are in her name and she pays for them.
someone might have told him it could be a std and hes waiting for the diagnosis to clear that suspicion.
You leave. ASAP
When he calms down he is a completely different person.
I think this is part of your problem. You are treating him as if he is two different people. Angry boyfriend, and rest of the time boyfriend. Unfortunately, they are not two different people, they are the same person and that's what you need to remind yourself of every time you start thinking about staying. This anger, the abusive nature, that's all part of him. It's not “He's a different person”, it's that “He's calm right now so he doesn't feel like abusing me”.
You called him out on it, he said it disgusted him that he did it, and yet, he keeps doing it. From your description, it is getting worse. It started with grabbing your arm, then shoving, then smashing your head into things, pushing you over so you broke bones, and now hitting you in the face while shoving you over. You do need to break things off, for your own safety. And please document everything that is happened. I doubt he will go quietly. Honestly, please, please reach out to a domestic violence hotline before you break things off. They will help you come up with a plan to do it as safely as possible. Do not do it alone, and preferably do not do this in person, because he will get violent, and you will not be safe.
Unreasonable? The dog attacked your child, he needs to go like yesterday. If your husband doesn't comply you honestly need to leave the house.
She is an animal abuser, she forced her elderly dog to live in terror of a dog that attacked it and sent it to the emergency vet three times
If you wait a year you will have the same argument at that time and you will have set a precedent.
If you wait a year you will have the same argument at that time and you will have set a precedent.
I agree that many men view women as objects for their sexual pleasure. I also know tonnes of women who can enjoy porn without viewing men as sexual objects.
The problem in this instance isn’t porn, it’s the type of porn that’s being consumed. Lots of amateur and female focussed porn represents porn in a much more realistic way. Perhaps it’s the case the men are more likely to watch the unrealistic, misogynistic, over produced porn, whereas women might be more likely to watch realistic porn with actual foreplay?
If all one’s watching is women getting gang fucked or even just sex between a man and a woman where no foreplay happens for the woman and she just gets fucked without being warmed up, then of course a guy will likely start to view a woman as merely a sexual object.
Perhaps in this sense the porn industry needs a shake up and men need to wise up to the affects their chosen misogynistic porn choices are having on their sex lives, but porn certainly shouldn’t be banned or viewed as entirely negative when so many people (pretty much all women I know who watch it) can enjoy it in healthy moderation and without it ruining their sex lives.
In fact, some female pleasure oriented porn can be incredibly empowering for women, and could certainly teach men a thing or two about female sexuality.
To conclude that porn is an evil because a certain sector of the industry promotes an unrealistic, harmful ideal and affects the way some men view women would be like saying weed should be outlawed and is entirely bad because some people can’t enjoy it in moderation without it negatively affecting their lives and altering their brain chemistry. This totally ignores the many benefits weed provides.
The negative effects of the porn industry is definitively an important conversation, but the discourse should be centred around why most porn has historically been influenced by the male gaze, and young people need to be educated that this representation is a totally fictionalised version of sexuality. Porn absolutely could feature more realistic healthy representations of sex. This could be great for all involved. Saying it’s all bad seems puritanical to me.
Thank you. Maybe i am stubborn but i'd like to try again with my wife and you are one of the few that actually offered valuable advices for that.
I'm aware of mental load, i'm now taking a larger part of it. Maybe i heard of it because of Fair Play but i didn't knew about the book, i'll check it out, thanks.
I'm gonna explore other interests outside our marriage but i'm not keeping tabs on time. The only thing i said is that i wanted a weekend just for us for every weekend that she spent on her hobby (3-4 times a year).
It was literally a death threat. If it happened to me I’d call the police.
Recovering alcoholic here, and your information is incomplete. Heavy or binge drinkers can have blackouts, but not always. Often it’s like fading in and out of consciousness, even at the time (as opposed to just how you remember it later)—you can “wake up” doing something you’re surprised about. Or you can black out for varying lengths of time (a couple of minutes or days).
You often don’t make smart decisions when very drunk, and sometimes can make choices that are not in line with your values. You hear a lot of “people do when drunk what they wish they could do when sober, but that was not true for me and doesn’t seem to have been true for people in the AA meetings I attend. You do when drunk what a weird zombie with a half-poisoned brain somewhat haphazardly chooses to do when drunk. For example, almost no sober person believes drunk driving is safe and morally correct. Yet this morning, a not-insignificant number of people woke up at home or in a jail cell, either remembering or not remembering they drove drunk last night.
You can also wake up and not remember the night before, but then little pieces of it come back to you. In my experience that never happened years later, though—there’s one night 20+ years ago and I’d like to know what I was up to, but it seems my brain just didn’t write it to memory.
Side note, and I am aware this will not be a popular thing for me to bring up: today, in many jurisdictions, it’s not possible to give consent while drunk (meaning drunk sex is legally rape). Laws vary (for example, Minnesota recently overturned a felony rape conviction because the victim got drunk voluntarily), but organizations like RAINN say consent cannot be given if someone is underage, intoxicated or incapacitated by drugs or alcohol, or asleep or unconscious.
Sorry for the wall of text! And please note, I didn’t write all that out in aid of backing up any sort of opinion about OP’s situation. I think OP’s wife is pretty suspect for making up the rape story—there were lots of ways to handle what happened, and if she chose to lie there were so many lies that didn’t involve rape. And why tell him now? It can only be to clear her own conscience and put down the heavy burden she was carrying… but she placed it right onto OP’s shoulders.
I could never do something like that to embarrass my family, or my other secret Canadian family.
Man, you sound like someone who is going to have a lot of really successful and emotionally satisfying relationships.
Unfortunately no. We online in the country.
Just be honest. You appreciate the gift and will keep it close, but you just don’t wear jewelry. Maybe you can keep it in your wallet so it’s on you. There’s no point in keeping some lie that’ll probably be a topic for another day.
What are you asking for advice on?
You said she’s done this before. She just wants to make herself feel better and wants the benefits of conversation with you while fucking someone else. Cut ties completely.
Block him. Dude is a creep.
You need to back off and let him tell you when he's ready instead of pushing him
I’d do my best but no one’s perfect + if he’s a more violent sneezer I could see how it could kinda get away from him.
I’m hoping that’s not the case.. he did say that he “has no control over what other people say to him” …. I don’t agree, I think you can influence how other people relate with you by sharing things about your life that will change their opinion of you, like being in a relationship.
You can rail against it all you want—to your own detriment in some countries.
I work for a danish company and most of my colleagues are in Europe or SA where they literally are not allowed legally to have the overtime or work off hours.
Meanwhile, I’m in the US and I have to make myself by 3AM for Europe teams and often take very late calls for Asia.
Life is all about choices. I like working for a great company and having autonomy and working from home if I’m not traveling.
Working in tech, we are pretty much always on call anyway.
Pays well. Lots of vacay (I just took 2.5 mos off) and I like what I do.
Be as negative as you wish. But most people don’t get to move up unless they are willing to go above and beyond. If you don’t want to take ownership or work a little extra as needed, cool for you. But that isn’t how you move ahead—even in Europe.
Listen. None of us knows him personally, but be careful and take it very very very slowly. So he has time to show himself. Be friends first, or acquaintances. Tell him you need time to trust him and time tells everything.
I mean maybe just go to her honestly. She probably wants him to herself. Getting the proof from her is probably easier tbh good luck
Let him leave and sue for child support. If he never wanted to have kids then he should have had a vasectomy and let you know he is done having kids. What you had is broken and you will never, ever, look at him the same way you used to, even if he change his mind and becomes a supportive husband & father. You will resent him for the rest of your life for what he is doing right now and frankly, that kind of marriage is not healthy.
“I would never physically overpower her” okay but that’s exactly what you did.
I guess I simply wouldn't date someone who's main hobby is something I find boring and don't want to hear about. That just sounds so incompatible. He's excited about it and wants to share it with you. If it's too long then you need to tell him to choose the highlight reel, but otherwise yes, most people would “tolerate” listening to their partner share something they enjoy.
My girlfriend works in the med field. Idk half the shit she explains with bodily functions but I love seeing her get excited about her progress and accomplishments. I am usually more than happy to listen and occasionally tell her to speed the store up. I'd consider thinking if y'all are compatible or not because he should be with someone who gets just as excited for him as he is about it.
7 deleted messages? He clearly did something very out of order at that bus stop, cheating? No idea. But maybe best to bump into this woman and have a chat? ( my husband told me what happened at the bus stop, is that actually what happened?) and then hope you got some juicy info
I was thinking this too, but I am wondering if he rejected her. It seems almost like he is trying to make it seem like he wasn't avoiding her, and that everything can go as normal. But there is definitely something here and pursuing it is OP's best course.
PS Gonna wanna see an update on this OP.
That’s great. Focus on yourself. Good luck.
First thing i look at is always the age lol
She’s not depressed. She messed up her sleeping schedule by staying up late one night. Ever since that day she just stays up till around 4ish am. That’s why she wakes up at 3. I love hiking and the outdoor but she’s the total opposite. I try really hard to get her out of the house but she refuses
Sometimes you need to learn to listen to what people are telling you, you are the only one not hearing what he is saying. You are throwing an “lol” at the end of his words and calling them a joke.
I know it can be hot. When me and my 1st fiancee broke up, I went back and forth between wanting to knock his head off to wanting to run away together and forget this whole mess.
Except the mess was that he tried to cheat on me with my best friend. It was such a violation of trust on multiple fronts. I will always remember my dad saying “things come and go but the trash always goes out on Mondays. And you don't miss the trash when the garbage truck carries it off.”
I know that there was one thing that I found repulsive back at 18:
when I had the feeling from the guys behavior that he was all into my body and having sex.
But zero about me, about who I was, what I was about.
That feeling of only being wanted for a part of the entire “me” made me reject sharing that desired part.
I needed to see/ hear/ feel the partner seeing and loving my character and personality also.
Luckily my boyfriend was into ALL of me, so he found ways to even love me when we quarrelled. I had issues with my eyes, which got me headaches.
He took me to the ophtalmologist (nearly by force) and chose my first glasses with me.
When I went for a longer travel on my own (him going on a trip with his friends) he got me one single rose and chinese crab chips. As I loved both.
He really found a way to listen to me. And to act in a way such as to make all of his love for me tangible to me.
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I(27) met the perfect guy ( 36M), but am I blinded by the bedroom?
To make it short I met the funniest person I’ve ever met in my life. Our first date he had me cry laughing. I felt very comfortable around him.. like when I went to his house it was like we already knew each other. We fell asleep on the couch. We cuddled, we watched his fav movie and a horror film (I love horror films) he doesn’t like them but still put one on…. The thing is I have the tendency of ignoring red flags if the guy is really amazing in bed. This guy is amazing. At everything… in the bedroom.. but I had some reservations I’ll put in point form. My friends thinks there are some red flags that I’m not taking into consideration
before we even met he kept going on about going on vacation together
he has two baby mama… which he said they’re both amicable but when we were at his house he said one won’t let his daughter at his house, she’s never been. He would have to go to her house to see his daughter for a few hours
he kept going on about how much money(good amount) he makes and that he owns two homes
-our first date he kept hiding his phone.. like everywhere he went.. even when he was cooking for me he would take his phone with him. (I think he noticed that I noticed what he was doing and then sat beside me using his phone in my view)
he asked me if I had a date before him because I asked to see him at 10pm.. I thought he was joking but he was dead serious
we were talking about fav artist and I mentioned mine (Post Malone) and he went on a rant about how unattractive he thinks Post Malone is…
during our first date he kept bringing up inviting me to events in the summer like weddings and friends stuff
he has a very big package.. like the biggest I’ve ever seen and went on about how I’m set when it comes to that part of him
he constantly mentioned how he took care of his past ex’s financially
he seemed overly excited about my looks (he kept bringing it up) I’m petite (not short but small frame) and I’ve modelled so I’m use to strangers coming up to me and complimenting how I look but he kept doing it the entire night…
he has three dogs. Who immediately loved me and would interrupt our conversation and wanted me to pet them a lot… he seemed to like it but then seemed to get jealous
These are just things I thought maybe red flags but idk cause I’m also scared of not seeing it because I ignored it before with my ex and wasted years of my life..
EDIT: so to be clear his second baby mama was his longtime gf. She was dating him when his son was a new born. She got pregnant moved two hours away and wanted him to come with her but he refused because that meant giving up 50/50 custody of his son who he’s been there for since day one. So she wants him to see his daughter at her house with her so they can play family but he just wants to see his daughter without being tricked into leaving his son to be a family with his ex and their daughter. He’s a great day from everything I’ve seen at his house. Had a room prepared for a baby that has never been there.
Yes I agree with red flags but I do not want it to come off like he’s a bad father. Cause that would be a lie.