It's not the same for everybody. That he was able to just stop means it's not a big deal to him.
Obviously masturbating is healthy, but not masturbating is also harmless aside from a very nominal increase in risk for prostate cancer or something. If he is happy, I don't see it being a problem. He might just have a slightly lower sex drive, or it might pick up when he resumes.
I'm assuming this is some type of tax fraud or something like that. Don't receive that money into your bank account especially if it's over whatever the amount you'd need to declare for taxes.
For some it’s boundaries and personal space. I think it’s important to a have place/space where you know someone isn’t “looking” over your shoulder so to speak. That could include venting about certain aspects of your relationships, looking for gifts that you don’t want them to know about etc. I know me and sometimes I can look up weird shit because I heard about it and I wanted to understand it better. It caused an issue in the past when my SO saw something in my search history. They were weirded out by it until I showed them the Reddit post on the subject and explained that I didn’t know what it was. I also work in IT and use my devices for work. The last thing I need is someone messing up my devices that I need. I’ve let friends, family and SO use them in the past. One decided to download something and gave me a virus on my PC. Another used my YouTube account and messed up my recommendations. While others ate food and left food debris all over it. I had one friend get mad that a site wasn’t responding and broke my keyboard. Nowadays I have extra devices people can use but I’ll never let them use my own stuff.
I do think he was going overboard with it though. He could have made another profile (really easy, anyone can do it) on his laptop that you could have used without seeing or messing with anything of his. Especially if it was a quick message like you said. I don’t know how to fix that situation but if you’re ever stuck like that again explain the profile thing on the laptop and that should help.
You don’t have many options. The camera was a great idea. If this man is going to become a problem then you need proof. Hopefully he’s just nosy because you are new to the neighborhood. All you can do is wait and see. If you see him when you are outside just give a friendly wave. Keep an eye out and you may need more cameras. Hopefully not but be careful.
This is her. I don't want to break-up with him. The only other reasonable thing left to do would be to give Riley to my parents. While I am sure they would take good care of her, I've raised her since I was 15. I want to make this work and I want to make my relationship with him to continue to work.
You are right. This isn't pragmatic, but its what we're going to try for and I hope it works.
In this same comment thread you admitted to getting “accidentally” pregnant then list all the ways you definitely didn’t think through unprotected sex so no you don’t think things through
Well, I guess she has some decisions to make them. You’ve kind of told her what you wanted. Don’t change stuff like that for a partner of the kind of this caliber. And what I mean by that and she could be a wonderful woman but you don’t online together and you’ve been together a year and a half. I would’ve felt different if you guys owned a place had a kid and we’re together like seven years. If there would be more of an investment. Obviously, you’re the one that has to make the choice but I feel like you’ve done that already. You want to move. So you may need to either end the relationship, attempt, long distance, relationship, and see if she still wants to be with you or stay in NYC
This happens all of the time. Let’s open our marriage and boom. Hopefully, this was not your idea. If it was his idea, then he was most likely cheating. Talk to your attorney. Be cognizant he may come running back to you. She will probably dump him down the line when she realizes how much he is going to have to pay you especially in CA. You should also google limerence and affair fog. Good luck.
You 25 years old be glad you finding out 2 years in and not 10. She is emotionally cheating and now wants to physically cheat but with permission. She is now distant because you refused so she has been forced to make a decision she doesn’t want to.
I would save her the trouble. Tell her this relationship is over. Her attitude to her co worker and now the open relationship shows she isn’t committed and doesn’t respect or love you.
Message any family members of hers to tell them thanks and be nice and block everyone. I know this is naked but it will save you pain in future.
Doing great! I'm a machinist now and I love my career. I was even a shop foreman for a while where I got to boss men around and fix their machinery! It felt really cathartic to experience that. If these people think sex work is empowering, oooooh boy, they're missing out a world of true empowerment. I feel sexier working on my lathe than I ever did as a sex worker.
This is why situationship is pretty much a “false” relationship. Almost every time this happens because one or both parties want the feel of a “relationship” without the label / commitment. So being “exclusive” like that is really dumb imo because its breaks the whole point of a situationship.
Be honest with the “exclusive” guy. Don’t tie yourself down with someone who doesn’t want to pursue the relationship further or want the same things you want. They aren’t even dating you, basically just a back up chick they can come home to when they want to feel “loved”. This next guy could be someone who wants to be more than that.
Sounds like an a-hole. To me that is sleep terrorism. No way he is not doing that shit on purpose to you.
The cope LMAO
Cmon man you’re 40 be man enough to admit you’re wrong
This has all the classic earmarks of controlling manipulation and abuse. You need to find a way to leave.
Research online about help from organizations that help people who are victims of domestic abuse.
You will be okay, when you find a way to leave.
So you're saying I need to start doing hip thrusts.. U.U takes notes
It's not the same for everybody. That he was able to just stop means it's not a big deal to him.
Obviously masturbating is healthy, but not masturbating is also harmless aside from a very nominal increase in risk for prostate cancer or something. If he is happy, I don't see it being a problem. He might just have a slightly lower sex drive, or it might pick up when he resumes.
Hi thanks the response, yeah when alcohol is involved.
I was 13 then, he was 21 and he liked me from the start.
It's exactly like that. He targeted you when he was a full-grown adult and you were (at most) barely pubescent.
I'm assuming this is some type of tax fraud or something like that. Don't receive that money into your bank account especially if it's over whatever the amount you'd need to declare for taxes.
literally lol
I don’t know what to do, I need advice…
Seriously?!? What!?!
For some it’s boundaries and personal space. I think it’s important to a have place/space where you know someone isn’t “looking” over your shoulder so to speak. That could include venting about certain aspects of your relationships, looking for gifts that you don’t want them to know about etc. I know me and sometimes I can look up weird shit because I heard about it and I wanted to understand it better. It caused an issue in the past when my SO saw something in my search history. They were weirded out by it until I showed them the Reddit post on the subject and explained that I didn’t know what it was. I also work in IT and use my devices for work. The last thing I need is someone messing up my devices that I need. I’ve let friends, family and SO use them in the past. One decided to download something and gave me a virus on my PC. Another used my YouTube account and messed up my recommendations. While others ate food and left food debris all over it. I had one friend get mad that a site wasn’t responding and broke my keyboard. Nowadays I have extra devices people can use but I’ll never let them use my own stuff.
I do think he was going overboard with it though. He could have made another profile (really easy, anyone can do it) on his laptop that you could have used without seeing or messing with anything of his. Especially if it was a quick message like you said. I don’t know how to fix that situation but if you’re ever stuck like that again explain the profile thing on the laptop and that should help.
You don’t have many options. The camera was a great idea. If this man is going to become a problem then you need proof. Hopefully he’s just nosy because you are new to the neighborhood. All you can do is wait and see. If you see him when you are outside just give a friendly wave. Keep an eye out and you may need more cameras. Hopefully not but be careful.
You don’t. He’s 41 and if he’s not figured it out then he thinks he’s fine.
You being friends with him while he is really abrasive to be around shows to him that he’s fine.
You would be better to find your own place (if you haven’t already) and let that friendship end. Put that energy into improving your own life.
This is her. I don't want to break-up with him. The only other reasonable thing left to do would be to give Riley to my parents. While I am sure they would take good care of her, I've raised her since I was 15. I want to make this work and I want to make my relationship with him to continue to work.
You are right. This isn't pragmatic, but its what we're going to try for and I hope it works.
In this same comment thread you admitted to getting “accidentally” pregnant then list all the ways you definitely didn’t think through unprotected sex so no you don’t think things through
yeah im confused everyone defending her but she gave no reason why shes against IVF?
Well, I guess she has some decisions to make them. You’ve kind of told her what you wanted. Don’t change stuff like that for a partner of the kind of this caliber. And what I mean by that and she could be a wonderful woman but you don’t online together and you’ve been together a year and a half. I would’ve felt different if you guys owned a place had a kid and we’re together like seven years. If there would be more of an investment. Obviously, you’re the one that has to make the choice but I feel like you’ve done that already. You want to move. So you may need to either end the relationship, attempt, long distance, relationship, and see if she still wants to be with you or stay in NYC
Updated **
Move the fuck out and leave her alone. Stop being a piece of shit for your future and next relationship.
This happens all of the time. Let’s open our marriage and boom. Hopefully, this was not your idea. If it was his idea, then he was most likely cheating. Talk to your attorney. Be cognizant he may come running back to you. She will probably dump him down the line when she realizes how much he is going to have to pay you especially in CA. You should also google limerence and affair fog. Good luck.
You 25 years old be glad you finding out 2 years in and not 10. She is emotionally cheating and now wants to physically cheat but with permission. She is now distant because you refused so she has been forced to make a decision she doesn’t want to.
I would save her the trouble. Tell her this relationship is over. Her attitude to her co worker and now the open relationship shows she isn’t committed and doesn’t respect or love you.
Message any family members of hers to tell them thanks and be nice and block everyone. I know this is naked but it will save you pain in future.
DM me if you need to vent.
Doing great! I'm a machinist now and I love my career. I was even a shop foreman for a while where I got to boss men around and fix their machinery! It felt really cathartic to experience that. If these people think sex work is empowering, oooooh boy, they're missing out a world of true empowerment. I feel sexier working on my lathe than I ever did as a sex worker.
Nope, the expensive gifts seem weird to me
She might be your girlfriend, and someone else's wife. Going silent for 3 weeks is not normal
There are 7 billion people on earth, you can find other BFs, he basically told you that he’s ending it indirectly
If you don't want to divorce him then you have 2 choices.
1) Stay married to a man that doesn't have sex with you and instead uses prostitutes.
2) Find a cheap Flux Capacitor, install it in your car, go back in time, and don't marry the cheating prick in the first place.
This is why situationship is pretty much a “false” relationship. Almost every time this happens because one or both parties want the feel of a “relationship” without the label / commitment. So being “exclusive” like that is really dumb imo because its breaks the whole point of a situationship.
Be honest with the “exclusive” guy. Don’t tie yourself down with someone who doesn’t want to pursue the relationship further or want the same things you want. They aren’t even dating you, basically just a back up chick they can come home to when they want to feel “loved”. This next guy could be someone who wants to be more than that.
This is taken from experience from my cousin.