File for child support, seek government assistance for everything you are eligible for, post an ad on roomster or CL seeking another mother to rent an apartment with, or look for a room in a house. Get on subsidized housing wait-lists.
He's trying to gaslight you, trust me it's not fun but if you blow up at him, he wins. Fighting someone that wants to gaslight you is a test of will power and patience
You know This and still typed in boyfriend instead of ex, in the future if you’re with someone one and off then that means it more than likely not gonna work bro
I don't think I'm involved just shaken by him calling and dumping this on me. Really I didn't know what was happening except he had a dead eyed look for years now. But I will focus on my parents, that is something I can do easily.
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I second this. It seems to me to just be an older guy awkwardly giving a compliment, not someone actually trying to initiate anything. I’ve had older men tell me they have a crush on me in a jokey way like that, and it was never serious. Like I’m closing up shop at work and one of my regulars says “lunch was especially great today; but maybe it’s just cuz I have a crush on the waitress” (I’m the waitress). It’s not a big deal. If OP felt unsafe or something, I would say otherwise (and obviously be careful), but this sounds normal to me, even if it was slightly awkward.
Sounds like everything needs to go her way and your needs are ignored. It’s not healthy and you’d be better off single. You cannot be held responsible for someone else’s life either.
The fact of the matter is this… we CHOOSE the way we act… it is a conscious decision.
My ex-wife would wake up angry that she had to wake up… then yell and scream at her daughters, to get up and get ready for school.
I am not like this… I would wake up, with the thought on my mind, that even though I’m not happy about waking up, how I react to it will set the stage for the day for MY two children.
I had a stupid little stuffed animal, it was simply called “the wake up sheep” (I still have it in my fireproof safe) that I would wake my kids up with… running it up their chest, bumping it gently against their face… saying “the wake up sheep needs you to get up”… and they would wake up, giggling and laughing… they woke up happy. I did my best to make their mornings pleasant.
I talked to my ex-wife about this, said “how are you starting their day off? You’re making your bad morning, their bad morning”.
Thankfully, she changed her ways.
Maybe this is the type of discussion you need to have with your wife… that we choose how we wake up in the morning. It’s not some genetic abnormality, she’s just reacting to waking up, in a terrible manner, taking it out on you.
He is a grown man. He should know better. From what I know you won't be able to change him. People only tend to change those bad habits when they are really in trouble. So as long as you are together, he will have someone safe and won't change.
Do you want to be with someone who will leave their things around even when you’ve told them it bothers you? Are you okay with continuing to do the majority of the chores?
If not, the living arrangement has to change, because she has told you she won’t.
Not your responsibility. You should never feel obligated to stay with someone out of fear of them hurting themselves. If her entire existence is dependent on you being available to her, that is a whole separate (and major) issue. I’m not surprised you feel drained.
From my male perspective. Porn is a tool. Unless you want sex every night, and that gets routine, porn is used by the partner that is more horny just to scratch the itch. If it’s not there, I will end up asking my partner even when I know she’s not in the mood and that causes the toon and rejection from both sides.
It's not something I would do, on either side of the age equation. That said, it's none of my business when two other consenting adults do it. I'm very much of the “you do you” mentality.
I don’t want to believe she’s a bad friend, but I will say I was disappointed after briefly talking about it today, she told me that it’s essentially a “me problem that I need to work on internally” because she would never feel disrespected by that and doesn’t understand why I’m feeling this way
She’s probably up to a lot more that you have no idea about, and only telling you about the small things to throw you off the trail of the huge stuff. What would you find if you looked through her phone and social media?
Your mom is giving antiquated nonsense advice from people who believe having a biological kid is the end-all be-all and that men only value women if they can conceive. This is absolutely not true.
You and your husband are already exploring options and he supports you. That is what is most important. I know that he is very against adoption but there are many kids who grow up adopted and are fine. It’s just important to support them during the inevitable stage of curiosity, especially if it’s a closed adoption. There are complicated feelings and being open with them is important. However, that is you and your husband’s decision to make. It sounds like you are a wonderful team. I know it’s hot, but try not to let your mom’s bad interference cause you doubts and insecurities when you know that you and your husband are already on the same page.
So she wants to keep you dangling on the line in case she decides to come back? Nope, clean break. And for heavens sake don’t share a dog. You can’t have a clean break this way.
Oh alright, I understand now, thank you for clarifying! 🙂 Yes I will be owner training it. I'm allowed to under federal law, and I cannot afford to pay for a trainer. And yes they are definitely smaller then a Newfie is lol xD.. Goldens make amazing therapy dogs! And service dogs too. 🙂 I do appreciate the help though. Thank you! And unfortunately only dogs and mini horses are covered under the law in my country. Lol but yeah I see what you're saying! Dogs can definitely do it best imo.
If you’re Jewish you know circumcision was an Egyptian thing they inflicted on their Jewish slaves as an act of unequivocal cruelty and was meant to humiliate them so your cruelty point is false. The origional version didn’t even remove most of the foreskin anyway, the modern version was invented by Jewish elders during the Roman days to prevent Jews from tying their foreskin remnants shut. The STD thing if true would have Europe erupting in STD’s and Americans being clean as a whistle which again is the opposite of the truth. The truth is that at best you get around a 1% reduction at the cost of nearly half of your child’s sensitivity (which ironically will prevent them from wearing condoms) and more than quadrupling their chance of Erectile dysfunction. Don’t say there are health benifits without also stating the risks. There are plenty of Jews who are against circumcision.
You're broken up. What she's doing now is up to her. She can rebound with him, or she can date him without it being a rebound. It doesn't really matter
His response here indicates one or more of three things: He doesn’t trust you. And/Or: He doesn’t see himself with you forever. And/Or: He has a really low opinion of women.
Is a man like that really the love of your life? I know you have significant feelings and attachment for him, but you want different things. Don’t waste more of your youth with someone who wants different things than you do.
At least you’re moving in the right direction thank God. I give you credit.
But why wait? It’s so empowering to say “I want better” and you shut that door behind you with him on the other side. It’s even more empowering when you say it to his lying cheating face.
She will be so much better off. She will realize that soon enough.
So can someone advise what I should do?
Move on from A and learn how to be a better partner.
File for child support, seek government assistance for everything you are eligible for, post an ad on roomster or CL seeking another mother to rent an apartment with, or look for a room in a house. Get on subsidized housing wait-lists.
We have hot hotel sex on our birthday
Quick tip religious hypocrisy makes kids rebel
He's trying to gaslight you, trust me it's not fun but if you blow up at him, he wins. Fighting someone that wants to gaslight you is a test of will power and patience
You are not on the same emotional path. Because of your ages, probably never will be. My advice, move forward.
He is an ass.
Get a new BF.
You know This and still typed in boyfriend instead of ex, in the future if you’re with someone one and off then that means it more than likely not gonna work bro
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I don't think I'm involved just shaken by him calling and dumping this on me. Really I didn't know what was happening except he had a dead eyed look for years now. But I will focus on my parents, that is something I can do easily.
Like okay…. Like when someone like like likes you….. you have a chance. But if they just like like you…. Your better off as friends
You’ve been with him for 7 years and he still has a drinking issue?
You are wasting your time.
Hello /u/AnnualBerry2208,
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I second this. It seems to me to just be an older guy awkwardly giving a compliment, not someone actually trying to initiate anything. I’ve had older men tell me they have a crush on me in a jokey way like that, and it was never serious. Like I’m closing up shop at work and one of my regulars says “lunch was especially great today; but maybe it’s just cuz I have a crush on the waitress” (I’m the waitress). It’s not a big deal. If OP felt unsafe or something, I would say otherwise (and obviously be careful), but this sounds normal to me, even if it was slightly awkward.
Sounds like everything needs to go her way and your needs are ignored. It’s not healthy and you’d be better off single. You cannot be held responsible for someone else’s life either.
Is your husband’s name William Jefferson Clinton?
The fact of the matter is this… we CHOOSE the way we act… it is a conscious decision.
My ex-wife would wake up angry that she had to wake up… then yell and scream at her daughters, to get up and get ready for school.
I am not like this… I would wake up, with the thought on my mind, that even though I’m not happy about waking up, how I react to it will set the stage for the day for MY two children.
I had a stupid little stuffed animal, it was simply called “the wake up sheep” (I still have it in my fireproof safe) that I would wake my kids up with… running it up their chest, bumping it gently against their face… saying “the wake up sheep needs you to get up”… and they would wake up, giggling and laughing… they woke up happy. I did my best to make their mornings pleasant.
I talked to my ex-wife about this, said “how are you starting their day off? You’re making your bad morning, their bad morning”.
Thankfully, she changed her ways.
Maybe this is the type of discussion you need to have with your wife… that we choose how we wake up in the morning. It’s not some genetic abnormality, she’s just reacting to waking up, in a terrible manner, taking it out on you.
What a bizarre comment. What does it have to do with explaining “women?” He’s talking about a specific behavior that could be seen in anybody.
Seriously weird take.
She sounds like an alcoholic who needs an ultimatum
Troll.
it isn’t anywhere near as bad as lying to your partner
The irony is people who lied will justify their behaviour: “I lied because I knew you’d get upset”
He is a grown man. He should know better. From what I know you won't be able to change him. People only tend to change those bad habits when they are really in trouble. So as long as you are together, he will have someone safe and won't change.
Do you want to be with someone who will leave their things around even when you’ve told them it bothers you? Are you okay with continuing to do the majority of the chores?
If not, the living arrangement has to change, because she has told you she won’t.
This sounds exactly like an episode of the Kevin Samuels show. RIP Godfather.
Not your responsibility. You should never feel obligated to stay with someone out of fear of them hurting themselves. If her entire existence is dependent on you being available to her, that is a whole separate (and major) issue. I’m not surprised you feel drained.
From my male perspective. Porn is a tool. Unless you want sex every night, and that gets routine, porn is used by the partner that is more horny just to scratch the itch. If it’s not there, I will end up asking my partner even when I know she’s not in the mood and that causes the toon and rejection from both sides.
I'm smack in between those two ages, roughly.
It's not something I would do, on either side of the age equation. That said, it's none of my business when two other consenting adults do it. I'm very much of the “you do you” mentality.
I don’t want to believe she’s a bad friend, but I will say I was disappointed after briefly talking about it today, she told me that it’s essentially a “me problem that I need to work on internally” because she would never feel disrespected by that and doesn’t understand why I’m feeling this way
She’s probably up to a lot more that you have no idea about, and only telling you about the small things to throw you off the trail of the huge stuff. What would you find if you looked through her phone and social media?
She is absolutely taking advantage of you.
Lesbian sex is way way better than straight sex and there is no penis is sight
This is probably why you're getting the downvotes.
The rest of what you wrote is true. If I have a choice between a clit toy and a insertion toy? Always choose the clitoral.
how is it over????
Your mom is giving antiquated nonsense advice from people who believe having a biological kid is the end-all be-all and that men only value women if they can conceive. This is absolutely not true.
You and your husband are already exploring options and he supports you. That is what is most important. I know that he is very against adoption but there are many kids who grow up adopted and are fine. It’s just important to support them during the inevitable stage of curiosity, especially if it’s a closed adoption. There are complicated feelings and being open with them is important. However, that is you and your husband’s decision to make. It sounds like you are a wonderful team. I know it’s hot, but try not to let your mom’s bad interference cause you doubts and insecurities when you know that you and your husband are already on the same page.
So she wants to keep you dangling on the line in case she decides to come back? Nope, clean break. And for heavens sake don’t share a dog. You can’t have a clean break this way.
Oh alright, I understand now, thank you for clarifying! 🙂 Yes I will be owner training it. I'm allowed to under federal law, and I cannot afford to pay for a trainer. And yes they are definitely smaller then a Newfie is lol xD.. Goldens make amazing therapy dogs! And service dogs too. 🙂 I do appreciate the help though. Thank you! And unfortunately only dogs and mini horses are covered under the law in my country. Lol but yeah I see what you're saying! Dogs can definitely do it best imo.
If you’re Jewish you know circumcision was an Egyptian thing they inflicted on their Jewish slaves as an act of unequivocal cruelty and was meant to humiliate them so your cruelty point is false. The origional version didn’t even remove most of the foreskin anyway, the modern version was invented by Jewish elders during the Roman days to prevent Jews from tying their foreskin remnants shut. The STD thing if true would have Europe erupting in STD’s and Americans being clean as a whistle which again is the opposite of the truth. The truth is that at best you get around a 1% reduction at the cost of nearly half of your child’s sensitivity (which ironically will prevent them from wearing condoms) and more than quadrupling their chance of Erectile dysfunction. Don’t say there are health benifits without also stating the risks. There are plenty of Jews who are against circumcision.
A $4,000 bag? In this economy?!
Stop by his place when he’s not there and hopefully a roommate will answer and explain you just need to grab your stuff and you’ll go.
Hopefully they’ll recognize you – I doubt he wants his roommates to know about his drama
Update: still together lol
THANK YOU. This is perfect, and i will do that exactly tomorrow.
You're broken up. What she's doing now is up to her. She can rebound with him, or she can date him without it being a rebound. It doesn't really matter
I was able to get over it.
Pretty sure you didn't.
His response here indicates one or more of three things: He doesn’t trust you. And/Or: He doesn’t see himself with you forever. And/Or: He has a really low opinion of women.
Is a man like that really the love of your life? I know you have significant feelings and attachment for him, but you want different things. Don’t waste more of your youth with someone who wants different things than you do.
At least you’re moving in the right direction thank God. I give you credit.
But why wait? It’s so empowering to say “I want better” and you shut that door behind you with him on the other side. It’s even more empowering when you say it to his lying cheating face.