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talia_fiore, y.o.
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Date: October 16, 2022
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Also planning future pregnancies, what do you need more kids for??
I mean, it might. Lots of teenage girls don't know enough to stand up for themselves when their boyfriends are being beef-brained ninnies.
Is there any chances she was using you for something?
She could be with you for money, or any other reason that people find to engage in a relationship they don't really mean.
She could just be asexual, but with that, she wouldn't be so against saying “I love you”. Asexual people are all about feelings since there isn't sex.
Those are the 2 options I could think, but idk why she would deny going to a therapist or couple counseling (and ur relationship stopped when you stopped having sex, let's be honest, if there's no sex, unless you are asexual, you are just a roommate or a teddy bear)
I didn't reply to his first message and he has been typing for like 10 minutes haha I don't think I will reply but im curious to see what he will say
You are assuming she knew she was a lesbian. As a lesbian who finally realized what the hell was “wrong” with me at 25yo, I can tell you that it is a VERY usual situation so don't be so fast to judge.
if you paid with a card that you share I would say “”I was just checking our card to see what I spent on presents and I saw this $350. What was this for? “
As someone who went through much of the same issues I think you need to evaluate why she is gaining weight if you want this relationship to last.
Overeating is often a coping mechanism for something else, much like substance abuse is. It could be trauma, stress, depression, anxiety, etc.
If you truly want to help her you need to talk to her about why she feels the need to eat so much, without discussing the eating itself, so you can get her help.
I struggled with the same issue with my wife years ago and while it's taken some time I stuck it out and made it work and she's making real progress – but not for me, for herself. And part of that was getting treatment for her depression.
Failing that if you can't make progress you need to sit down and have a serious conversation that while you will respect her life choices you will not enable her and make yourself suffer. If you have long term goals such as marriage or kids I think you need to emphasize the importance of promoting healthy habits for them and their mother actually being around to see them graduate rather than dying in her 40s from a heart attack.
There's no situation where this is an easy conversation to have and while I understand why many would say you need to respect her boundaries and leave if it's an issue I don't think that's actually going to help either of you if you don't actually want to leave.
But yes, failing all else you may have to make that decision.
Stop worrying about it. Y'all are in your 30s: too old to worry about silly social media bullshit. Social Media is cancer to relationships.
Is it also your fetish not adding a single paragraph?
You can argue if it's cheating or not until the sun dies, Don't even have an argument skip over it, Ask her if she will commit to Cut off people who repeatedly hit on her After being told no. If your girlfriend says you're being jealous or controlling or it's not cheating, Just agree and lean into it , Say yes I am being jealous or controlling and understand it's not cheating, But please do this for my sake and for the sake of our relationship, To me this is something that will strengthene rather than a weaken our relationship and thats why I need to ask you.
See how your girlfriend responds to that good luck, Just know that in the future your girlfriend gets to ask you Something in the bank of Saint Paul park and you might feel it's unnecessary but this is about indulging each other And a roll of thumb is will it overall strengthen or a weaken the relationship.
For example if your girlfriend asked you something ridiculous like quit your job because your purely professional boss is female you know you will resent your gf if you quit your job that you like so then you should disagree in that case.
You need to learn to disengage when you enter into a disagreement.
She basically admitted that she would potentially be abusive to him if he gains weight in marriage… after he manipulated her into dating him with misleading pictures… lovely couple /s
Honey I’m implying that your siblings are much much closer than siblings should be, which is why they are acting weird about this. Please read between the lines here. They’re not ignoring you out of spite, they’re avoiding you because it only takes 2 to tango
Do a move
Why are you posting this here? Post this on r/AskMen and you'll find the responses are that you should have cleaned him out. That fucker needs to not only be out of your friendship circle, he needs to be taught a lesson.
As an intelligent male, please, for the love of god, don't EVER say or use “situationship” ever again in your life. Call it whatever it is, but don't make up words.
Idk at this point I'm convinced I have no chance to get back with her especially how she worded the things she said to me through texts like “I don't want to be with you, Nor pursue a relationship with you.” which honestly just hurt me and I feel like I'll just eventually just get replaced with somebody else.
Fact: 20 yo males are not very mature and bad at making decisions. I would assume that for the first 2 or 3 years, he won't be a great dad. He just needs to be enough of a dad to be an equal partner in raising this child. You're not going to be perfect either.
Though, if I were you, I would figure out what you need to do to be able to support yourself and the baby all by yourself. If he really has no empathy there may be a time when you don't want him around.
Look into opening a small day care: you can be there for your baby, work at home, and make good money.
He's prepping you for the day that you find out that he's been cheating on you for the past four years. It's time to take the blinders off and really see him for who he is showing you that he is. Hope is a shit dating strategy.
I wouldn't say the part about you not coming if there won't be intimacy. That's forcing her to do something that she may not want to do if she wants to stay in the relationship and that's not good in the long run for your relationship.
I think you should both consider going to therapy to work through these issues. I would go for her birthday and see how that works out. If you don't feel a connection, consider counseling.
You're not a bad person for wanting intimacy. It's an important part of a relationship. If she can't offer you the intimacy that you feel you need, you need to look at ending things. That's obviously the last resort but I just wanted to make sure you knew that there wasn't anything wrong with you for wanting that part of your relationship.
Honey, he ain’t ya boyfriend. This is just your roommate who’s sleeping around.
Just be careful. I understand how you feel you owe your daughter. Just be careful!
All of those things you mentioned are his problems and they also show how good you are for him.
The problem is that he’s not good for you.
Great job doing what’s best for you!
He needs to grow up, get therapy and become single. That will fix your issues.
Why do you seem more concerned about the friend, than your girlfriend?
Not just that but…his ex was so stressed about him PRESSURING her into sex that she forked out 2k for a sex doll??? OP, that has nothing to do with your libido and everything with him not respecting boundaries. That's a massive red flag if I ever saw one.
Also- the skydiving gufr was clearly very well thought about by yourself, OP.
Ooffft. There is ALOT to unpack here. I'll try to be quick.
You say that what she described made you insecure. The fact that your GF enjoys sex, or specific acts, shouldn't make you feel insecure. And your reasoning makes no sense, “it was degrading”. But you haven't explained how it is degrading.
Women need mental stimulation to get turned on. Her describing what she wanted you to do was helping her get in the mood. And you made her feel bad for it. You shamed her for being sexual.
It wasn't the other men that got her turned on. It was the thought of doing the act with YOU. And how did you react? You walked away from her, you told her that her sexual desires made you insecure and that it was degrading.
How would YOU feel if you expressed a fantasy to your partner, and her response was “Oh, that's really degrading & it makes me feel really insecure that you have done that before with someone else”?
The entire implication in how you reacted & what you said was “You are not allowed to have sexual fantasies, and when you express those, it is gross & degrading. You are not allowed to speak like that. You exist for my pleasure, you don't matter beyond what I get from you. When you express any sexual desire in explicit detail, it makes me think less of you”.
THAT is why she is upset with you. There is a double standard in society when it comes to how men & women are allowed to enjoy sex, which is fundamentally misogynistic & sexist. And you just displayed that side of yourself to her.
Do some research & educate yourself. I'm not going to spell it out for you.
She’s a grown woman. A girl is a child.
Both of you put your adult pants on and take a stand.
“Didn't feel like doing the whole foreplay routine” Yike, no wonder she doesn't want to have sex with you.
That’s a 17 year old girl.
That’s a 17 year old girl.
That’s a 17 year old girl.
You have children. You were a child once.
So how did he feel about you posting about this a bunch on-line?
Bye boy. This is the way.