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Date: October 27, 2022
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Yeah and its quite sad
Not that I'm aware of
This is so bizarre. Your first paragraph is all how in love you are together bla bla bla then suddenly you say you want to fuck other people?
You messed up.
Girl the flag is RED.
This is borderline sexual harassment, trying to force someone you know you hold leverage over to have sex with you under threat of cheating, would not count as consent if you gave in (at least in my book). Your gf sounds like she has a problem and if she's willing to hurt you like that over something as little as a minor break from sex then she is bad for you and will no doubt hurt you more in future.
It's an 8-yr relationship. Her financial and (I assume) communication issues were well known to you before you decided that “this is my person.”
So what happened? Was she your person, or did you actually want someone somewhat like her, but better at xyz? Because that wasn't her.
Emotionally, it sounds like you had been strong at some time, and you relied on her during your illness and she stepped up. If the emotional issues are more recent, maybe it is burnout on her part.
You’d have to talk to him. And given the other issues, seems that working with a sex positive/LGBTQ friendly couples counselor would be smart.
To me, those images are no different than consuming filmed porn. Just because someone has a fantasy or fetish doesn’t mean they expect their partner to participate.
But as someone who is a cis het woman and married a man who turned out to be gay and cheating on me with men….I wouldn’t just ignore this. And here’s why: when I kept finding things that lent me to believe my (ex) husband was interested in men, I offered to open the relationship. All I asked is that he meek me safe emotionally (don’t lie to me) and physically (use protection). He denied it every time the topic came up.
And then I caught him having an affair of months and ended up with some permanent but not deadly STI’s. Pretty sure he’d been screwing around with men throughout our decade long marriage.
So….I’m not saying my situation is your situation but it’s not just about monogamy, it’s also physical safety. So I wouldn’t drop it.