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Date: October 25, 2022
He's weird, sounds like a win not a loss.
I dated someone 2 years older than me recently. I’m 19 about to turn 20. He turned 22 after he broke up with me. The dynamic was off at times because I was still fresh out of the whole living with my parents/being independent/high school relationships. I had no idea how to work an actual adult relationship at times. And it did make it somewhat difficult. I felt like I was being thrown into something I had no idea how to work because I was so used to the high school dynamic. Seeing each other 5 days out of the week. Having the same things to do. Having close to the same amount of free time. But it’s different when you’re older and I do realize that now. But I wouldn’t have at 18.
Now we just ended up not being compatible I believe. Maybe our ages played into that. I think it did a little bit bc his expectations and mine were different. Maybe it’s because I’m young and have only been in the “adult world” a short amount of time that I have the expectations I have. I think that people in their 20s and an 18 year old just have two different mindsets about the world. 18 year olds are just starting to gain even more independence and the things they’ve known are now changing bc they have new responsibilities. People in their 20s have some sense of their responsibilities and expectations because they’ve been living it for awhile.
Just my two cents
I really don’t think it matters that she’s bisexual, but that if it’s true that this is an amorous vacation it is kind of shitty to tell someone all this lovey dovey and expect them to wait for a relationship while you go and date/sleep with other people and don’t give them transparency.
Yes no moral wrong was really done, but that would be a major turn off for me. It’s a little manipulative, maybe, or just icky and kind of casually power trippy. Idk op, but whether or not she’s bi or gay with you as her one unicorn of an exception I am just saying I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with someone who started it off like this ?♂️
If a man wants to go, just let him go. You're trapping him emotionally with all this stuff yet you won't let him go. All this will just keep building up. You said that “with him it's a tough choice to make in forgiving, accepting and trusting”. He's not asking to be forgiven, accepted and trusted though. He has obviously reached his emotional threshold for him to have said what he did.
I would rather be single than be with someone who dreads coming home to me. Focus on yourself and your kids and how to have a good co-parenting relationship with him.
Yes