Yes,seems like. However it just hurst my feelings as he is completely ignoring me now,he doesn't look me in the eye anymore,avoiding eye contact. Seems like he is escaping,as he got scared of commitment.
You either get abortion or let the guy and his family have the full custody instead of having the baby adopted by strangers. That is if you really don't want the child and can't take responsibility. I'm not even judging you for not wanting to continue the pregnancy nor having relationships with this guy you barely know and don't love. What you're feeling is valid. Despite the pressure that family members or other people might give. You don't necessarily need to marry him just because he got you pregnant. Marriage is not the solution to this dilemma. Marriage could actually even make it worst. You also have an option of co-parenting but then, the burden is usually on the mom. Usually (especially) on the cases of teen parents, the girl need to stop schooling for a meantime to care for the child while the Dad can still have the freedom to do what he wants. Usually woman are the ones making the huge adjustment. And obviously you can't and don't want that for yourself. So better consider the first two options. Abortion or giving full custody to the guy and his parents considering they're the most excited to have the child.
This is probably better suited for r/sex but be sure to read their community guidelines before posting because I’m not 100% sure. Regardless, this forum is for requesting advice and this post doesn’t fit.
Yeah, it’s always been like that and very unfair. It is better now and there’s a lot of younger, nude men don’t like older women. And a lot of women do better in business as they get older. So it’s not completely that way.
Not to mention, looking at the rest of the details in OP's post, I doubt he'd be faithful even if he was 'getting enough'. This man is an abusive asshat with the maturity of a child and the behavior of a man from 1900. Yeah- OP could have banged him 15 ways till Tuesday and he'd do the same thing with some other bs excuse to blame OP his actions.
This is a tough post for me, personally. I am not a fan of abortions, not at all.
HOWEVER, from an advice point of view, thos is shitty of your boyfriend. You told him from the beginning of your relationship, and it seems like one he told his family, they pushed back and NOW he has to rethink it?
He supports you, or he doesn't. He needs to stand up for you, not fold like a cheap suit to his family.
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
There's no good way to tell him, but some ways are better than others. Keep it brief and honest. Remember that you're explaining your decision, not trying to persuade him to agree with it.
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
It sounds like you're living your lives in parallel. You're just the most convenient wife to fill in the role that he wants you to fill. You keep asking him to change to actually be a partner and he just wants to live his life his way without prioritizing you whatsoever.
I wouldn't continue a relationship with someone like that.
You kept someone that sleeps with married men as a best friend. So you shouldn’t be surprised that she would sleep with your husband. But you are you saying you never saw the texts or evidence. You are just taking his word for it. Yet he had 7 years to come clean. I call BS. He would have to be the one to file a police report. If you have any texts or messages from her threatening you then you can get a restraining order.
Validate this story. Tomorrow invite her over first then him. Sit them down in front of each other and say let the truth set you free and see wh squirms!
In court this is like badgering the witness. Asked and answered – she apologized for not locking the door, and offered you some peace of mind about how to see whether anyone had slipped in during this instance when the house is unlocked.
Let it gooooo. If I were her I'd just be exhausted.
I was gonna say, this shit does not happen. It just doesn't. So much liability of there was a SA and drama if there is an affair. Hell, they could probably get sued just trying that with employee's/
She's living her life on her terms, you're living your life on her terms. Maybe that's why it's not working. Your present and future have nothing to do with her.
He either doesn't care a hoot about your relationship or you are the side chick. Not enough info.
Missing a vacation for no clear reason would bd the end for me. You suggested ghosting in a comment but a text of “this isn't working out for me, I think we should stop seeing each other” would also work.
The only thing that has changed are my thoughts, but everything is the same as it was. And thank you! I’ll give cbd gummies a try. Anyway i’ll start going to a psychiatrist next week so i hope i’ll get proper diagnosis
There is a reason this man is dating someone so much younger – it’s because he thinks you’ll be easier to manipulate and control. He does not get to demand your attention at all times. He does not get to spam your phone when you are just out with a friend. Dump him immediately before you are in too deep to get out safely.
A very anxious and mistake-prone woman getting emotionally involved with a guy who has a superiority complex is a recipe for disaster. All the available personalities in the world to couple up with and you picked the one that would be the absolute worst for you.
I’m leaning towards the fact that he’s a predator but I also am thinking about my own discover page which is filled with toddlers and babies because I have a 1 year old and like and comment on a lot of baby related stuff. However, nothing is sexual about any of it obviously, just kids saying their first word or wobbling next to their pet dog or something lol. So the fact that the posts it’s meant to be sexual says a LOT, and that you should definitely leave bc if it were just like innocent pics of baby girls it would make sense bc he probably was excited for having a baby girl but yeah, this don’t sound normal.
If we're already in the realms of immaculate conception, I'll be the person to point out the other wildly obscure possibility.
If you've just peed on a stick at home … Very rarely, things other than pregnancy can produce HCG (the hormone responsible for positive pregnancy tests). Notably, tumours.
While that's absolutely true, looks can and do matter a lot in relationships anyway. It's not necessarily about being shallow. It's a situation that sucks all around for OP. It would've been easier to stomach if the fiance just told her instead
this isnt how poly relationships work, this is just cheating; ive been in a poly relationship for many years now and you do not get with a partner who isnt comfortable with it, because when one party doesnt consent, its cheating
im sorry, but i think itd be better if you broke up, all that will happen is that you will get hurt, she is a coward and a cheater and its unfair to you to be treated this way
You leave buddy . I dated a woman just like this and the problem is she needs to fix herself. Every human gets stressed that doesn’t mean their s/o becomes a punching bag . It’ll only get worse from here
I am so glad to hear that you have a brother to support you in this. It is never an easy decision to distance yourself from family, but I am glad you decided to do so because I do think it’s the right one for your mental well-being.
I hope your sister accepts help to leave someday and comes to terms with the truth of everything that’s happened, but I think you’ve done all you can for now. You can take solace in that.
In the process of planning my escape now! I know he’s going to try to make his way over here when i get off work & I have ring cameras around my apartment that he is aware of so i would hope he doesn’t try anything crazy! & thank you!!
You have value as a human. Even if you don’t feel it, you have the same value as your daughter. All that love you have for her, all the worth you see in her, you also have. Life might be trying to defeat it out of you, people may try to trick you into believing your value is a lie, but it’s not.
You finding safety, security, self-worth will also be a boon for your child, whom you love. You deserve it for both of you.
I don’t know what the first step is for you, but you can make a life that feels good to you, one that you can be proud of and feel safe in. Look at yourself – you already are doing that for your daughter. You love her and want to keep her safe, and it sounds like she isn’t lacking for your care.
There have to be social services resources near you. I know you might feel you’re in a big hole, but there’s a way out.
You can't fix a situation that you didn't cause, mate. Yea it sucks that Jenna had a breakup, but Jenna is an adult just like the rest of us.
I don't think that your girlfriend realizes that just because she's Jenna's best friend, that doesn't mean she has to be an emotional enabler. Jenna thinks that this type of thing is OK, when it really isn't.
You did nothing wrong here. Don't normalize Jenna and your girlfriend's lack of recognizing that you aren't a bad guy for apologizing for this. You honestly seem way more rational than most people. I guess that comes from you being a teacher, which I thoroughly applaud you for.
So you pay for everything and do everything in the house, and he just gets to do what he wants without giving anything in return? Congrats to your bf for finding a stupid lass that lets him be a freeloader.
It's best if you tell him. It sounds like you acted appropriately to a kiss you did not want (the jerking away and avoidance anyway; I hate that the rando made you feel depressed over this). It should not be considered cheating if it was not consensual on your part. But if your boyfriend hears about this from some witness at the party instead of you, he may wonder why you didn't tell him.
What the hell is the big deal with poo. Everyone does it, and I don't understand why this so-called girl had to go downstairs and tell everyone. I would dump him myself. They embarrassed you and it wasn't ok
Your mistake was apologizing. You should break up and let her figure her own self out for a while. She wants to legally separate but not breakup? what a joke. She knows she can't live the way she does without you but she doesn't to give you any of HER money. You should start charging her for the caregiving if she does that. 25 bucks an hour AT LEAST.
I've tried, but he sees the two as synonymous. If i don't want to spend every waking hour with him, I must not want to be with him (at all) and we've had this discussion so many times.
I want to hop in here because it’s the top comment – OP if you are going to have any sex with this woman you need to wear a condom – you both need to get an STI text now and in 3 months. She also needs to take pregnancy tests over the next weeks to be sure.
If they love in Massachusetts middle class goes up to about 280k but they are certainly on the higher end and shouldn't be struggling so bad that OP can't afford to work a 9-5.
Your time is not less valuable than his, and it's time your husband learned that you are just as entitled to leisure time as he is.
I hope this will be a wakeup call for him and he will start to realize that the only reason he has any free time at all is because you sacrifice yours.
im so sorry all that happened, im not gonna even try to give advice, but i do wonder, how did this come up? was it something you actively remember or was it some type or certain therapy made to uproot something youd forgotten deep inside you
You're right, but at the same time, his perspective is skewed. He was probably VERY young, if not unborn, when this happened. He had no agency over it, and his mother and father, the apologizer and molester respectively, are the ones who raised him. Of course they (probably especially the mother) will have convinced him that it's all OK now because they drilled that into his head throughout his entire childhood. When you become an adult that kind of programming doesn't just dissappear, and the fact that he still lives with them makes it much less likely for him to start to realize that they've manipulated him into being complacent with it his whole life. It's also very likely that the parents fabricated a narrative for him that isn't reality to make his father seem more forgivable, or rather to convince a little boy that it's all ok, and he's never actually heard the truth of what happened to it's fullest extent. She definitely shouldn't move in. He should move out, whether it's with her or not.
To be honest she is more likely to hide something from me, even if it’s not embarrassing but still do it . So yeah that one also true to hide something that happened or did from me is most likely , cheating is least things im thinking about because i don’t want it to be real ,but if it is well i dont know . Life i guess. Im trying to overcome that idea by sharing this post because i have no one to share my thoughts with . Thank you friend for time i really appreciate it.
If you want to know WHY he acts like this, you can read Psychology books; there could be many reasons. But honestly, you don't need to know WHY to know this is a toxic relationship for you and you need to get out!
Waiting around to figure out why would be as dangerous as sitting in a burning vehicle, trying to figure out WHY it's possible the entire vehicle might explode. You can learn about it at your leisure from the safety of distance (both in time and space).
Please take everyone's advice and kick him to the curb. Tell him you're taking him at his word that he can't date you and that you agree and it's over! Wish him well, then BLOCK HIM on every social media platform (his friends/family, too), and on your phone. My guess is he'll try to harass you because he's an abuser. You would do well to get a new phone number and insist that none of your family and friends give it out to anyone for any reason. (Their response should be, “Do you want to leave your name and number so I can let 0531163 know you're trying to reach her? She'll call you back IF she's interested.”)
Happy Birthday! Mine is on Thursday and I'm going through a similar situation with my soon-to-be ex-wife. I hope things work out for you!
Yes,seems like. However it just hurst my feelings as he is completely ignoring me now,he doesn't look me in the eye anymore,avoiding eye contact. Seems like he is escaping,as he got scared of commitment.
Lmao word
You either get abortion or let the guy and his family have the full custody instead of having the baby adopted by strangers. That is if you really don't want the child and can't take responsibility. I'm not even judging you for not wanting to continue the pregnancy nor having relationships with this guy you barely know and don't love. What you're feeling is valid. Despite the pressure that family members or other people might give. You don't necessarily need to marry him just because he got you pregnant. Marriage is not the solution to this dilemma. Marriage could actually even make it worst. You also have an option of co-parenting but then, the burden is usually on the mom. Usually (especially) on the cases of teen parents, the girl need to stop schooling for a meantime to care for the child while the Dad can still have the freedom to do what he wants. Usually woman are the ones making the huge adjustment. And obviously you can't and don't want that for yourself. So better consider the first two options. Abortion or giving full custody to the guy and his parents considering they're the most excited to have the child.
You said you are a virgin? As in…. Still a virgin?
Is it possible this is performance anxiety on your part?
What a tool
This is probably better suited for r/sex but be sure to read their community guidelines before posting because I’m not 100% sure. Regardless, this forum is for requesting advice and this post doesn’t fit.
Yeah, it’s always been like that and very unfair. It is better now and there’s a lot of younger, nude men don’t like older women. And a lot of women do better in business as they get older. So it’s not completely that way.
Why are you dating a child?
It’s sooooo complicated. Who could possibly know what to do??
Not to mention, looking at the rest of the details in OP's post, I doubt he'd be faithful even if he was 'getting enough'. This man is an abusive asshat with the maturity of a child and the behavior of a man from 1900. Yeah- OP could have banged him 15 ways till Tuesday and he'd do the same thing with some other bs excuse to blame OP his actions.
This is a tough post for me, personally. I am not a fan of abortions, not at all.
HOWEVER, from an advice point of view, thos is shitty of your boyfriend. You told him from the beginning of your relationship, and it seems like one he told his family, they pushed back and NOW he has to rethink it?
He supports you, or he doesn't. He needs to stand up for you, not fold like a cheap suit to his family.
Hello /u/fabulousjackulous,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
There's no good way to tell him, but some ways are better than others. Keep it brief and honest. Remember that you're explaining your decision, not trying to persuade him to agree with it.
Hello /u/sassyrei_,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Exactly. Don’t set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.
And there’s gonna be some child support
Maybe apologise sincerely?
It sounds like you're living your lives in parallel. You're just the most convenient wife to fill in the role that he wants you to fill. You keep asking him to change to actually be a partner and he just wants to live his life his way without prioritizing you whatsoever.
I wouldn't continue a relationship with someone like that.
Really depends on the individual.
You kept someone that sleeps with married men as a best friend. So you shouldn’t be surprised that she would sleep with your husband. But you are you saying you never saw the texts or evidence. You are just taking his word for it. Yet he had 7 years to come clean. I call BS. He would have to be the one to file a police report. If you have any texts or messages from her threatening you then you can get a restraining order.
Sorry to say it sounds like he was cheating before. From the first time he went to the club without you he was looking for a replacement.
Good job blocking him. I wouldn't bother to wish him well, he doesn't deserve it. Don't ever contact him again, he'll just call you “pSyChO!”
Good luck. Make a bunch of money, get ripped (or fit, whatever you're into), and find a new man that's respectful and worth of your time. Stay strong!
Why were you still sleeping with her after you found out she cheated on you? Or am I lost on the timeline.
Validate this story. Tomorrow invite her over first then him. Sit them down in front of each other and say let the truth set you free and see wh squirms!
Nasty ass predator trying to justify yourself. Just admit it.
In court this is like badgering the witness. Asked and answered – she apologized for not locking the door, and offered you some peace of mind about how to see whether anyone had slipped in during this instance when the house is unlocked.
Let it gooooo. If I were her I'd just be exhausted.
I was gonna say, this shit does not happen. It just doesn't. So much liability of there was a SA and drama if there is an affair. Hell, they could probably get sued just trying that with employee's/
She's living her life on her terms, you're living your life on her terms. Maybe that's why it's not working. Your present and future have nothing to do with her.
He either doesn't care a hoot about your relationship or you are the side chick. Not enough info.
Missing a vacation for no clear reason would bd the end for me. You suggested ghosting in a comment but a text of “this isn't working out for me, I think we should stop seeing each other” would also work.
Let him come and wear what he wants. Ignore it. He’s the one who will look like an asshole.
The only thing that has changed are my thoughts, but everything is the same as it was. And thank you! I’ll give cbd gummies a try. Anyway i’ll start going to a psychiatrist next week so i hope i’ll get proper diagnosis
There is a reason this man is dating someone so much younger – it’s because he thinks you’ll be easier to manipulate and control. He does not get to demand your attention at all times. He does not get to spam your phone when you are just out with a friend. Dump him immediately before you are in too deep to get out safely.
A very anxious and mistake-prone woman getting emotionally involved with a guy who has a superiority complex is a recipe for disaster. All the available personalities in the world to couple up with and you picked the one that would be the absolute worst for you.
He’s so bad that people here are sympathetic to landlords.
I’m leaning towards the fact that he’s a predator but I also am thinking about my own discover page which is filled with toddlers and babies because I have a 1 year old and like and comment on a lot of baby related stuff. However, nothing is sexual about any of it obviously, just kids saying their first word or wobbling next to their pet dog or something lol. So the fact that the posts it’s meant to be sexual says a LOT, and that you should definitely leave bc if it were just like innocent pics of baby girls it would make sense bc he probably was excited for having a baby girl but yeah, this don’t sound normal.
If we're already in the realms of immaculate conception, I'll be the person to point out the other wildly obscure possibility.
If you've just peed on a stick at home … Very rarely, things other than pregnancy can produce HCG (the hormone responsible for positive pregnancy tests). Notably, tumours.
While that's absolutely true, looks can and do matter a lot in relationships anyway. It's not necessarily about being shallow. It's a situation that sucks all around for OP. It would've been easier to stomach if the fiance just told her instead
Again – why are you still with him?
Move on you are worth more than this
this isnt how poly relationships work, this is just cheating; ive been in a poly relationship for many years now and you do not get with a partner who isnt comfortable with it, because when one party doesnt consent, its cheating
im sorry, but i think itd be better if you broke up, all that will happen is that you will get hurt, she is a coward and a cheater and its unfair to you to be treated this way
You leave buddy . I dated a woman just like this and the problem is she needs to fix herself. Every human gets stressed that doesn’t mean their s/o becomes a punching bag . It’ll only get worse from here
OP she WILL change her mind! After she gets with the ex for a while and realizes the grass isn't greener.
You really want to be her consolation prize?
That’s too small of a space for 3 adults, 2 of which WFH.
I think you should move out, see each other a few times a week, and then work on a plan.
You respond by telling her to ask the person she cheated on you with for their family recipes and then, you block her and move on.
OK then when you move, but if you don’t do it, she’s going to be following you around forever. Or at least for a long time.
I am so glad to hear that you have a brother to support you in this. It is never an easy decision to distance yourself from family, but I am glad you decided to do so because I do think it’s the right one for your mental well-being.
I hope your sister accepts help to leave someday and comes to terms with the truth of everything that’s happened, but I think you’ve done all you can for now. You can take solace in that.
It’s been an abusive relationship.
This is why. He is pissed off he can't control you anymore.
Don't give it a second thought. He is just punishing himself.
In the process of planning my escape now! I know he’s going to try to make his way over here when i get off work & I have ring cameras around my apartment that he is aware of so i would hope he doesn’t try anything crazy! & thank you!!
I didn’t say he was on the phone all night, every night of the week. we have done so a couple nights in the past two weeks, maybe like 3.
he has also literally never complained or even said he didn’t want to call until tonight.
And that is a 100% valid reason to not.
You have value as a human. Even if you don’t feel it, you have the same value as your daughter. All that love you have for her, all the worth you see in her, you also have. Life might be trying to defeat it out of you, people may try to trick you into believing your value is a lie, but it’s not.
You finding safety, security, self-worth will also be a boon for your child, whom you love. You deserve it for both of you.
I don’t know what the first step is for you, but you can make a life that feels good to you, one that you can be proud of and feel safe in. Look at yourself – you already are doing that for your daughter. You love her and want to keep her safe, and it sounds like she isn’t lacking for your care.
There have to be social services resources near you. I know you might feel you’re in a big hole, but there’s a way out.
♥️
You can't fix a situation that you didn't cause, mate. Yea it sucks that Jenna had a breakup, but Jenna is an adult just like the rest of us.
I don't think that your girlfriend realizes that just because she's Jenna's best friend, that doesn't mean she has to be an emotional enabler. Jenna thinks that this type of thing is OK, when it really isn't.
You did nothing wrong here. Don't normalize Jenna and your girlfriend's lack of recognizing that you aren't a bad guy for apologizing for this. You honestly seem way more rational than most people. I guess that comes from you being a teacher, which I thoroughly applaud you for.
So you pay for everything and do everything in the house, and he just gets to do what he wants without giving anything in return? Congrats to your bf for finding a stupid lass that lets him be a freeloader.
It's best if you tell him. It sounds like you acted appropriately to a kiss you did not want (the jerking away and avoidance anyway; I hate that the rando made you feel depressed over this). It should not be considered cheating if it was not consensual on your part. But if your boyfriend hears about this from some witness at the party instead of you, he may wonder why you didn't tell him.
This isn’t /r/amitheasshole.
This is /r/relationship_advice.
Calling someone an asshole for walking into their own home and looking for a safe space is counterproductive to the sub and the post.
It’s not productive, moves nothing forward, and berates OP for submitting content.
Despite the fact that you are attempting to be empathetic, you’ve managed to berate someone for simply existing in a place they feel safe.
Use your “big girl words”, and maybe attempt to support someone simply asking for help and advice.
What the hell is the big deal with poo. Everyone does it, and I don't understand why this so-called girl had to go downstairs and tell everyone. I would dump him myself. They embarrassed you and it wasn't ok
Your mistake was apologizing. You should break up and let her figure her own self out for a while. She wants to legally separate but not breakup? what a joke. She knows she can't live the way she does without you but she doesn't to give you any of HER money. You should start charging her for the caregiving if she does that. 25 bucks an hour AT LEAST.
I've tried, but he sees the two as synonymous. If i don't want to spend every waking hour with him, I must not want to be with him (at all) and we've had this discussion so many times.
maybe throw in some good oral on an off day from time to time.
I want to hop in here because it’s the top comment – OP if you are going to have any sex with this woman you need to wear a condom – you both need to get an STI text now and in 3 months. She also needs to take pregnancy tests over the next weeks to be sure.
If they love in Massachusetts middle class goes up to about 280k but they are certainly on the higher end and shouldn't be struggling so bad that OP can't afford to work a 9-5.
GOOD FOR YOU FOR SETTING BOUNDARIES!!
Your time is not less valuable than his, and it's time your husband learned that you are just as entitled to leisure time as he is.
I hope this will be a wakeup call for him and he will start to realize that the only reason he has any free time at all is because you sacrifice yours.
This sounds like an incredibly bad idea. Don’t do it.
im so sorry all that happened, im not gonna even try to give advice, but i do wonder, how did this come up? was it something you actively remember or was it some type or certain therapy made to uproot something youd forgotten deep inside you
You're right, but at the same time, his perspective is skewed. He was probably VERY young, if not unborn, when this happened. He had no agency over it, and his mother and father, the apologizer and molester respectively, are the ones who raised him. Of course they (probably especially the mother) will have convinced him that it's all OK now because they drilled that into his head throughout his entire childhood. When you become an adult that kind of programming doesn't just dissappear, and the fact that he still lives with them makes it much less likely for him to start to realize that they've manipulated him into being complacent with it his whole life. It's also very likely that the parents fabricated a narrative for him that isn't reality to make his father seem more forgivable, or rather to convince a little boy that it's all ok, and he's never actually heard the truth of what happened to it's fullest extent. She definitely shouldn't move in. He should move out, whether it's with her or not.
“the first kid absolutely destroyed her. So anyways got another one due in a bit” like wtf?
To be honest she is more likely to hide something from me, even if it’s not embarrassing but still do it . So yeah that one also true to hide something that happened or did from me is most likely , cheating is least things im thinking about because i don’t want it to be real ,but if it is well i dont know . Life i guess. Im trying to overcome that idea by sharing this post because i have no one to share my thoughts with . Thank you friend for time i really appreciate it.
Also if he's too tired, plan to bring in toys they make the work a lot easier. They aren't his competition, they're an assist.
so why does he do that?
If you want to know WHY he acts like this, you can read Psychology books; there could be many reasons. But honestly, you don't need to know WHY to know this is a toxic relationship for you and you need to get out!
Waiting around to figure out why would be as dangerous as sitting in a burning vehicle, trying to figure out WHY it's possible the entire vehicle might explode. You can learn about it at your leisure from the safety of distance (both in time and space).
Please take everyone's advice and kick him to the curb. Tell him you're taking him at his word that he can't date you and that you agree and it's over! Wish him well, then BLOCK HIM on every social media platform (his friends/family, too), and on your phone. My guess is he'll try to harass you because he's an abuser. You would do well to get a new phone number and insist that none of your family and friends give it out to anyone for any reason. (Their response should be, “Do you want to leave your name and number so I can let 0531163 know you're trying to reach her? She'll call you back IF she's interested.”)