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Tokage, 20 y.o.
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Tokage
Date: November 28, 2022
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Yep. That's what it sounds like. Live! and learn.
Try talking to him again, and explain that if he doesn't stop this behavior, you want to go to couples counseling to find a resolution.
Alternatively, a solution might be for him to not voice everything — it sounds like he needs to be more intentional and take a beat before he speaks. Right now he's on autopilot and likely doing it without thinking.
Yo I just dropped $30 g's on my best boy's honey and now he's acting all whack, is he fo real?
Honestly, it may not always be something you can control in this matter.
The fact is you two are different people. He is clingy by default, and thus more codependant. While you are naturally independant.
This causes a lot of conflict and irritation, as these things continueously cause disruption in your relationship; causing the “good things” in it to become less significant as the pile builds up.
He needs someone who matches him the way he loves you. And while you love him too, it is not in that same way.
Basically, right now you two are speaking two different languages, and you can't understand each other very well.
That doesn't mean there isn't a solution. But it will take a lot of nude work, and both of you to compromise.
To balance codependancy and independancy; we call this “interdependance”. You'll both have to compromise a little to reach that middle point.
This will require some really strong communication from both of you. And you really both need to take the time to LISTEN and TALK to each other about this.
That said, the way you act on this is your choice and in your control. But the way he responds is his responsibility, not yours. If he doesn't cooperate or wont put in the same effort; it isn't going to work.
At that point… save both your troubles and acknowledge the differences will remain just that. You both deserve better at that point.
If my SO of 11 years decided to carry on a relationship with someone who he feels he has a “more natural emotional connection” with, then I’d say- good luck with that! Bye!
You chose to marry this man, you chose to grow a relationship with this NEW man, you chose to withdraw important conversations from your marriage and instead have them with someone who doesn’t “lecture” you, without even a care in the world that you are damaging your marriage.
It does not MATTER whether or not you think you can open up to this friend- if he is acting as though he is interested in you and your husband is making passive remarks about it- he sees that, too (obviously), and he is not going to be happy about it.
How would you feel if your husband was speaking with a woman who he deemed to be “more emotionally connected to” than you?
Seriously, not only are people disloyal as hell but they are also completely unaware of how they would feel if their partner did the same exact thing to THEM…
If you want to talk with someone about your emotions, make it someone who doesn’t seem interested in you romantically, or work on your relationship with your husband until you CAN talk about it with him… or find a therapist.
PUT EFFORT INTO YOUR MARRIAGE, not random others.
I think he broke that trust when he took nearly twice what he said. He also doesn't seem to understand how serious this is.
He ought to be free to pay for his friend, but you're not obligated to be his friend's friend.
Create a separate account. You can be together, but you need financial autonomy.