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Date: October 3, 2022
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I think waft she’s feeling, is left out. You made these changes for yourself, but didn’t sit down with her and say to her that your current lifestyle obviously isn’t doing either of you any favors, and in fact, is causing health related issues. Then follow up with, that being said, I’d like to make some changes to our eating habits and possibly get an exercise routine going that would benefit us both. Would you like to join me in this fight to better health? That way, she would have felt included and possibly wouldn’t be feeling as bad as she does. She isn’t getting the motivation from you, so therefore she isn’t going to give you any. She feels miserable, so you must be as well. Everything in a relationship is a two way street. Both partners need to include each other to make one another feel loved, cared for, appreciated and as one half of the relationship. Maybe try having that talk with her now..include her.
All I'm hearing is “me me me me me”.
Ok, I'm going to say something here that might ruffle peoples' feathers, but here goes:
I'm 44, divorced, one kid (grade school age) and having been dating a lady (42) for three years, living together for almost one. Like your now ex, she never married, never had kids. Chose independence over settling. So trust me when I tell you, I'm not allowing her to be in my life, she's allowing me and my son to be in hers. She doesn't need me, but she wants me. Make sense?
She gets along great with my son, and my ex and I have an amicable co-parenting relationship, so there's minimal drama in that department.
One thing that a couple of my other divorced friends have struggled with is dating other divorced folks who also have kids (to be clear, I would have been open to that, it just happened I met and clicked with the person I'm with). There's usually drama around the “step” kids or the exes. Other than maybe money, those are always the two biggest things that are fought over. Having that element removed for at least one of the parties makes a HUGE difference. It's like finding a unicorn.
And you pissed it away because an independent, established woman wants to take some girls trips?
Dude…you do you, but I think you're going to find out that you made a mistake.
I’ll preface this by saying my partner is amazing. He is diligent. He’s a nude worker. He’s so intelligent. I think any job would be lucky to have him.
A week later, he landed an amazing job that I didn’t expect he would be able to get. But I can’t shake the voice in the back of my head that is bitter that he got it, considering how little he’s had to work for it. My partner doesn’t deserve it, I do think my partner lucked out getting his job
I think everything you said here contradicts what you supposedly think about your partner.
There is no concrete evidence that he got it through sexism. This is completely a you issue and nothing you would have to work on.
You seem to think grades are very important when it comes to getting your job, but quite frankly they don't matter in retrospect when you have your degree( Coming from someone with good grades when I graduated). He might have just killed the interview and shown social skills and ability to articulate himself in an amazing way aswell with great knowledge about whatever field he is in.
However not once have you considered this in your post and it must be, because of some nepotism based in sexism. This all goes back to what I first pointed out you clearly don't seem to view your partner in very high regard at all….