0 views
❤️❤️❤️ ????? ❤️❤️❤️, 25 y.o.
Location:
Room subject:
To Start on-line video press there
Online Live Sex Chat rooms ❤️❤️❤️ ????? ❤️❤️❤️
Date: October 10, 2022
The ad code is not a valid HTML code.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
Obviously, you don't have a lot of information, so I can't be sure. But this sounds like he's trying to make you feel insecure and indebted to him for staying with you, which is an abuse tactic. The idea is to make you feel so weak in the relationship you don't fight back or stand up for your self when he criticises you, and you don't push him around (a common paranoid fear of abusive men) because you believe he's the last man who will ever have you.
If that's why, just leave him. He's a virus who won't give you a single good day in your whole relationship.
Of you think there's another explanation, you need to make him explain WHY they said this, what they based this on, what he said to them to prompt them to say that, why so many of them are saying it, if they have ever said it to him about women he's dated before, whether he believes them, what he said back to them, and how he feels about their friendship now that they've said this.
Put up a boundary. Sure, I can see how he feels insecure about this situation, but expecting exclusivity after one date is unrealistic. You didn’t cheat.
“Boyfriend, I can’t be in a relationship with someone who treats me as if I’m a cheater. You either stop bringing this up and treat me with respect, or I’m out.”
Firstly, you'd be surprised how quickly you can burn through 1 mill. Invest/save the bulk. Don't dramatically change your lifestyle… just enough to be comfortable.
Do not share with a date or new relationship what you have in the bank – that is something for far down the road with someone already serious. Gifts and nice dates are fine, but don't be ridiculous about it and don't make it expected behavior.
I mean, he's clearly not prioritizing you, why are you even hesitating?
You're not blocking him for his brother getting sick, you're blocking him for the one before, and the twenty times before that. Does that help at all?
This wasn't the one for you, sis, throw him back.
It's not a big deal. You're overthinking it
She is already making her moves and he is oblivious to it, like a frog in a pot on the stove. She will be funny, then flirt then propose a drink together after vibing to a sexy song. Blah, blah, blah and he will find himself in the sack with her and not have a clue how he got there.
That hug was a signal to the OP that she is going to take him too and there is nothing she can do about it. She doesn't want him, she just wants to screw with OP by screwing her man. This woman is as toxic as an algae bloom and just as sneaky. He should avoid her like the plague that she is. He should find another band or he will have to find another wife.
What do you think might happen?
I don't think he's talking about an ex?
You’ve got this!!! It will seem hot and almost impossible right now, but I promise it gets better and easier and then one day you’ll realize you can breathe again. Then comes peace and happiness.
Girl you gotta go Dora mode because can you find your self respect?
Man cheated. Lied. Lied more. You had to pry it out of him. Yes, you’re sad. But like…why aren’t you mad? Why aren’t you furious? Why are you still with him.
THIS MAN DOES NOT LOVE YOU. Men who love you don’t step out multiple times and lie to you about it. And you do not love him, you just love the image you have of him in your head. The reality of the man you’re with is eluding you because you’re too busy thinking about the man you thought he was.
“Sorry” is garbage when the behavior is repetitive. Have some self respect. Call this mess of a relationship off and work on yourself so that you don’t accept this type of treatment from your partner in the future.
If you love yourself, you’ll never settle for someone who loves you less than you love you.
Yikes
I want to say yes, one day when the $$ runs out he may be back on your doorstep. Blondie will find a new sugar daddy. In the mean time, get yourself together, heal your heart and put yourself back out there. There are many good men(I have one), who are looking for a wonderful partner, this dude was not that guy.
Oh, turn him away, if/when he comes back – fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.
How dare you say humans are animals! We have thoughts and feelings unlike animals that are just interchangeable objects! /s
Though sadly way too many people feel this way, people like OP's boyfriend.
Please don’t break up bonded kittens. Almost every shelter will have you adopt two kittens together. They are social animals. Also taking away one cat and then trying to add a kitten is going to mess with your cat and they will act accordingly.
Also these are your babies now. When you take the responsibility of adopting an animal, that responsibilities for their entire life. Not until you just feel like it. Cats get zoomies…. All of them. If the poop thing happens when he’s staying over it’s probably your cat telling you dude is an AH. Giving up one of the cats and separating them makes you a giant AH.
I want to know why you are even with this guy. You moved all they way across the country because he didn’t respect your relationship and now he’s calling you names because he wants to control your life. You do know there are other guys out there right? Has he made you feel like no one will ever love you again? You know that’s BS right? You are not ‘fake or lame’ he is controlling and selfish. Keep the cats. Ditch the guy.
I’m not going to sugarcoat this because I’m not in a great mood due to losing 9 years of emotional investment in a person recently so I hope you don’t take this as being mean.
Grow a spine (i wish I’d had this advice) she is at best emotionally cheating. At worse you are not her only sexual partner at the moment.
I’m not going to sugarcoat this because I’m not in a great mood due to losing 9 years of emotional investment in a person recently so I hope you don’t take this as being mean.
Grow a spine (i wish I’d had this advice) she is at best emotionally cheating. At worse you are not her only sexual partner at the moment.
Wonderful timing ?
“While I'm mad at him, I'd like to try and repair the friendship. I just want him to understand what he's done and why I'm hurting. Though I don't think I want to continue a friendship with Elinor, not after she has laid straight to my face for the last 9 years.”
You're taking it out on the wrong person: SHE didn't know your husband was married. He did. He is the ONLY one to blame in this situation. Then, he compacted the problem by lying when they told him to tell you.
“Yet neither of them thought to check with me that I knew, they just took what he said at face value.”
Since he was honest (more like busted) about the affair, she had no reason to think he wasn't being honest now. So, she *wasn't* “lying to your face for 9 years.” Your husband was. As for your “best friend,” he had ulterior motives for not telling you: He didn't tell you, not (or, not just) to spare your feelings, but because he wanted to protect her from you.
Be annoyed with your best friend. Ditch the lying, cheating husband that has broken your trust yet AGAIN. Keep her, she sounds like the best of the bunch: honest and upfront.
Well said
Spot on. I can see where she got the abusive behavior from with the way her mom is behaving. Just tearing down this poor guy, I hope he gets away from them
I think since all of these things happened before you confronted him, you should let it go.
Honestly trying to treat the allergy is your best bet. but if that's not on the table then you'll definitely have to choose.
adopting a dog is a commitment that you make to the dog for the rest of its life. you've looked after him for almost a year now! that's a long time for a dog. if you plan on staying with your BF and it turns serious, you'll eventually have to give the dog up later on in his life which is devastating.
again, if it turns serious with your BF, you'll never get to have a dog unless he's over the allergies. you'll have to accept that. its a big deal for some people. you've had your dog long before you met him so i understand why people are advicing you to break up but i know its not that easy.
but you'll most probably have to choose. that depends on your priorities and whether or not you'll regret one decision more than the other since keeping the dog and your BF would be cruel to him as well.
Mind your own business…you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, and certainly aren’t privy to any agreements between this couple. Your friend isn’t so innocent here, she knew what his marriage status was, yet she gets a free pass for her behavior and willing participation?? Don’t bring drama to your new marriage, it will come back to you someday
my thoughts exactly.
My teen boys do this with the dogs. When my son got “his” dog, he was 8 and the vet told him that was an easy way to teach the puppy to pee outside. It stuck.
Ok but I didn't and we're here now. I don't have a time machine so I need to figure what's the right thing to do now. Instead would've should've
Ok but I didn't and we're here now. I don't have a time machine so I need to figure what's the right thing to do now. Instead would've should've
How do you draw that conclusion? I’ve asked someone out that I was genuinly interested in, and cut contact after the rejection because it would simply be too awkward and not sit well with me. I would also take a “I will think about it” as a rejection. If there’s no enthusiasm or interest from them, I wont pursue it further.
Your an ASSHOLE! You do not go into a marriage by trying to change your wife! Like seriously, what are you on! You change your accommodation, your job, your hobbies. You don't change the woman you plan on marrying.
You change your attitude! That is what you change! You stopped having regular sex? It is probable that she doesn't climax to your sex sessions. This is 100% not your fault and has nothing to do with the size of your dick or the shape (although I have heard that slightly bent dicks help; things you learn on Reddit.) Take her to a sex shop and buy her what she wants, and I guarantee you that you will get more sex in exchange for spending time with her while she uses her toys.
You sound like a real dick. I would change that before she leaves you.
That's not psychopathic behavior, it's more in line with narcissism.
Yeah we talked about that possibility and he doesn’t want to. He said he’s afraid to go because if the doctor finds out something is wrong with he might kill himself. Well of course I couldnt press it any further.
However he has talked about wanting kids in future. I am not sure how he plans to do that when sex doesnt interest him. Sometimes I worry that he just nay not be attracted to me in that way.
Is it a good enough reason to end the relationship?
Idk where OP is from but that thing about moving out of the house as soon as you are of age is mostly a USA thing. In my culture for example it is completely normal to on-line with your parents until you get married. Also you don't know what a person's circumstances might be, you don't know what might have went on in his life or why he is living with his parents. Open your mind a little and don't be so judgamental, damn
In all seriousness, you deserve somebody who treats you better and makes you feel good. This guy is not it.
It’s a shocker he is with someone 20 years younger /s
So if those are the odds of him catching it each time they had sex then the cumulative chance of catching it assuming the had sex on average twice per week conservatively (20-22 weeks, twice per week, so say 40 times and 30-50% each time) then it would seem to be highly unlikely that she didn't cheat
I think more worrisome is that she lied about the kind of relationship she’s had with him. So that means instead of telling you an uncomfortable truth she prefers lying. About what else does she lie then?
This is an issue you’re faced with regardless of age, because some people prefer to have all the benefits without putting in the work, but expect you to act according to the rules. In your case it’s not keeping in touch with sexual partners.
Both my best friends have partners who are a good bit older than us, but they’ve been together for a long while. They also didn’t lie about things they knew are important boundaries and worked on finding compromises instead. Her age doesn’t excuse her actions.
I want to. I need proof of her infidelity before I can
i'm sorry you're going through this! this reminds me of the plot of bad moms lol. he sounds like he doesn't help you much with work or around the house, leaving him might even destress you. you can do this. i'm sorry he didn't appreciate you enough, you deserve better.
Well her dad's impending death likely isn't doing much to help her feel motivated to eat better and exercise. Maybe you can take over meal planning/cooking as a “favor,” for both of you, and suggest couples work out dates as a way to distract her AND get her in a healthier body. Teamwork. It never hurts to have a partner who is your best friend. But IF you don't actually care to date her any longer, break it off after the holidays and just tell her she is welcome to stay for now because you care about her and want her to be safe.
Put him in the rubbish bin with your tampons.
Nothing to worry about he's probably just dead
What do you mean by focus on things? Can you ask him exactly what would make things interesting for him?
I can understand where he is coming from. In relationship I want to have a good conversation. I wanna know what you’re passionate about. I want to support you in life’s endeavors. I want to stimulate my mind which will attract me to you even more. People that tend to just be routine and don’t express their interests to each other and join in them together
u/Formal-Ad-4263, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.
The right way to do it is to create a brand new Reddit account that begins with ThrowRA.
Please create a new account that starts with ThrowRA in the username and try again. Please note that we will not make exceptions to this rule.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
He ended the relationship on holiday so he could cheat in peace.
maybe it’s because i wasn’t super into sports growing up, but is “best male athlete of the year” not inherently subjective? sure scoring points and being good at the game should be taken into consideration, but it certainly isn’t everything.
also it really doesn’t mean much that your BF would’ve been fine with his other two friends getting the award. they’re his friends so of course he would or should be fine with it. i don’t think the text is necessarily transphobic, but if he is so quick to dismiss Jacob as only getting the award because of his gender identity, then he’s definitely toeing the line.
doesn’t mean he can’t be frustrated or disappointed that he or his friends didn’t win the award despite being “better players,” but it certainly doesn’t point to him being a good team player if he’s unwilling to even entertain that Jacob could deserve the award despite not being the top point scorer.
I think that I could talk to my parents about drawing some boundaries with them for their and my sanity. I basically wanted reassurance that this wasn't just weird to me.
My kids never left me alone in the bath until the one day I got stuck, back issue, and nobody came for ages
Ha yes ? was hoping he would respond like that but he didn’t unfortunately
Hello /u/increbelle,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
So say he confesses to cheating. Why would you want to “work things out” with a man who by your own admission has cheated on you the whole of your relationship?
Do you think he’ll change suddenly? Do you think he’ll suddenly realise he loves you so much he’ll never cheat again?
He doesn’t love you. He doesn’t respect you. He cares so little for you that he is constantly out and about looking for other women then coming back home to you and sleeping like he’s innocent.
Hello /u/Ok-Permission-3145,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
This year is over today. Did you get married? How far away is this marriage? In your shoes, I would demand the two of you get married at the courthouse on 01/03/23. It costs just a few dollars and takes only a few minutes. You can have a fancy wedding anytime thereafter, but will be protected.
As for being in his will. I have no comment. It takes five minutes to change a will.
Saying you probably have more saved up than you would have earned in five years shows your naivete about retirement savings. Social Security is paid in and matched by the employer. So is a 401K. You're also not paying into disability at all. Also, having been unemployed for such a long period of time is really going to affect your ability to even get a job.
You asked for advice, but I think you just wanted validation for being with this person and raising his child for him. Sorry. No can do.
Then I think you have a lot of growing up to do. Your job as a parent is to protect your child. While your situation may have worked out fine, I can assure you the vast majority of men in their 30’s shouldn’t go anywhere near teenagers.
she’s cool with his questionable morales/ethics because they won’t be eating fried babies dipped in honey mustard together, so who cares?!? /s
Her mental gymnastics in these comments as to why they aren’t actually incompatible and how he’s actually the greatest thing since sliced bread are great.
You are exactly on point. Yes, the comment was in poor humour and would've also made a lot of people uncomfortable. As you said, it was probably also driven by his want to have sex, no logic behind it.
But it was something that could've been fixed on the spot. Apologetic and remorseful, as you said. The anger was confusing. Thank you for your response.
IMO it's that time of year where people get lonely and start redirecting the dead girlfriends/boyfriends of the past.
I also say don't give him your pain on a silver platter. He knows he hurt you. You know he hurt you.
Go on-line your best life ever, be happy, be healthy. None of that is contingent upon him and any of the potential I'm sorry's or other bs he has to spew.
I think that's a good idea, but be prepared for her to turn it down.
He doesnt have the type of love you need. I know this may have cause a dip in your self esteem but your worth isn't based on the changes your body goes through. You deserve more than that. It'll be insane if he thinks he would stay the same forever and to have that used against you is crazier.
This however is just a sign that he's not right for you long term and it's a part of dating. You take a chance on someone hoping it works out. Im sorry you have to deal with this. It sucks. You should be surrounded by someone who makes you feel good as you grow and change through life
Age gap. No. Disgusting
Thank you. I see this completely. I just feel and strongly believe that the only way out is something else obliging me to leave, it’s the easiest way in my home. If I can tell them, a school is asking me to go here, they would never hesitate. Im a first generation student and education is the only thing I have going for me. If I can have a full ride, I’m set. And i hope for these things, it sucks if they won’t happen. But for now, this is kind of the only way out.
There are plenty of horror stories about all of the options on the table. She should talk to her doctor.
He hasn't had the surgery. I didn't say he had. Having the options of condoms forever/vasectomy/ or no sex at 24 is not a fair position to put your partner.
There are other effective methods of birth control where they can practice safe sex and not put her at risk.
Your “principles” are outdated, mysoginistic and frankly ridiculous. You're supposed to be equal partners.
Wait… So she did…
This little comment train here you have with yourself is further proof the root issue isn't his dream life. Your trauma about a terrorist attack has NOTHING AT ALL to do with her or his dreams. You're conflating completely separate issues. That's an emotionally driven and irrational thing to do.
Unfortunately it also opens you up to being susceptible to bad, emotionally-driven advice like you've already seen here.
You need to work on separating out and dealing with issues without conflating in completely different issues. You're just making it harder to deal with things when you conflate them.
Then it moved beyond work, casual stuff, not dating. One day we decided it is getting too serious
You acknowledged that things between you two were “getting too serious”. Like, before she and her fiancé split, which is long ago. If you were just “two normal people spending time and doing things together”, then why would you have to had to change up the relationship dynamic and boundaries if you weren't doing anything that could have potentially lead to something more?
But, if you want me to overlook those time periods and pretend like it's not relevant, okay. It actually almost makes it worse. Because then, it just means that you're willing to blow up your relationship with your girlfriend of 4 years over a “3 month” situationship that might or might not go anywhere.
At the end of the day, it's your choice who you want to be with. If you're not happy with your partner, break up with her. But don't pretend that everything is peachy keen and string her alone while you sneak around with this other person building a new relationship.
She’s way too old for you, don’t waste your youth on her. She picked someone young so she could manipulate them, men her age would laugh at her antics.
When my parents were alive, the thing they always appreciated most were heartfelt letters. Write your step dad a letter (hand written, not email or text), and tell him exactly what he means to you. List the things you love about him.
Break up with him and grab a lawyer and trust your good need a real good one.
All I read is: My boyfriend needs to earn more money to afford a relationship with me. ?
Don't start a fight about a topic you know people around you would be upset about. I don't get where people don't understand this is her fault.
When you have a conversation about someone else, you're risking outting that person's business to others. It's the fault of whoever was talking for not being more careful about other people's info.
You have a responsibility when you know something to keep it from spreading.
You do realize that if you do convince him to move into a house, he'll turn that into a shithole too?
I will look into this thank you!!
nope. it's not realistic, especially at your age.
especially especially if you think this way. that is an extremely cruel way to treat a partner (telling them they never had feelings for you). what, were they just using you?
good luck to you. hope better for you in your next relationship
I remember the first time I joined a gym with a lap pool. I wasn’t in the best of shape but I had some experience lifting weights and with light cardio. I thought “how hot can it be?”
One of the only workouts in my life where I got out of the pool, got faint, and almost threw up. Granted, I probably pushed it way too nude, but swimming is such a great workout.
INFO, would you be so keen to move out if not for Macy?
Everyone has their preferences. Both of my brothers and my dad went bald in their early 20’s. So did my partner. It’s genetic. If you are totally icked out so be it. At 22, you have a different view on things than someone a little older I suppose.
Just wait til you have scars from an accident or a breast biopsy and someone dumps you for something you can’t help, didn’t ask for, and can’t change.
It's only been 5 months. It's time to break up, as it's just not working out. That's the whole point of dating
Omg. I’m so glad they got to keep both girls. Stuff of nightmares.
Thank you very much, you really opened up my mind alot with this and definitely gave me a new perspective of this. Thank you very much!
She was wearing a t shirt
Sexuality isn’t an on and off switch.
Keep doing your job superbly, and any time you find yourself daydreaming about him, say to yourself in your meanest, crankiest voice, “he's married.”
I could be way off base here, but I'm wondering if she had some plans for that day that you didn't know about, and she was upset that she couldn't follow through with the plans. If that's the case, I can see her being a ball of emotions in terms of knowing that you were doing something nice and wanting to appreciate it, but feeling upset that she couldn't do what she intended to, and not being able to tell you what was up with her since she couldn't or didn't want to tell you what she was really going to do that afternoon or evening. Again, I could be way off. It was her words to the effect of “why today?” that kinda made me think something was up.
Haven’t had a chance to read all the comments but even if the consensus is that you shouldn’t have surprised her or meddle in her work place etc., it still seems like there’s a huge red flag here. I can’t imagine how A 30 year old woman who is mentally healthy otherwise has such difficulties regulating her emotions and can’t properly communicate her feelings. If she was upset about what you did, she should be able to communicate that with you like an adult. Maybe there is something bigger going on but either way, this is a huge red flag for down the road if this relationship continues .
Your husband is an asshole. Please show him this thread and comments. And his friends are also assholes.
I’m so sad for you. I don’t believe they forgot or there was a miscommunication. I hope you leave these group of people behind especially your “husband”.
You’ve aged out and he’s interviewing your replacement
Wtf is wrong with you dude?
Of course you shouldn’t be walking around a 14 year old girl in only tight fitting boxers – that’s just super creepy and gross. You should not be undermining your partner by going running to her teenage kid to undermine your partners reasonable request to you.
Buzz Aldrin just got married. Man is 93. There’s time.
If I were you, I would start by talking to one of the 3 people (whoever might be the “bossiest”) that are trying to make this a thing and “confide” in her by telling her that this situation is getting out of hand and it really needs to stop before someone gets hurt. You don't need to give too many details but just say that. If you get pressed to say more, you can say you've got your own situation that you're dealing with and getting involved with someone you just started working with is a bad idea. Or say that you have a policy that you don't date coworkers because it always ends badly.
Oh gosh OP I know how you're feeling. I recently found a love letter from my bfs ex (from about 14 years ago). I don't know why I read it. I shouldn't have done it. I thought it would be just cutesy crap from a 20 year old but no, it was raunchy ?? and my dumbass read the whole thing. So I saw it all in black and white. It wasn't even that it was particularly good or adventurous sex. It was just a strange read. I should have stopped as soon as it looked like it was about to turn, but nope, like you I pushed on lol. Anyway, afterwards I'd get this weird niggly feeling everytime we had sex or he said he loved me. We usually have a totally sound relationship but this letter shook me to the core. I don't think you are being a little bitch, I think it's a jarring situation and abit disheartening. If you keep the lines of communication open then in time you will get over it. It doesn't mean he was better, it was obviously the spontaneity of it that made it a memory. You can capitalize of that information and bring some spontaneity into your sex life with her. Experiment with new toys, sex games, new places, role play etc. It will eventually get out of your head.
Weird that you came here for a victory lap in a situation that is either fake or way too complex for an 18 year old to handle with a potentially abusive partner. Could it be trauma? Definitely, but she should be as far from this situation as possible.
This line stuck out to me as well. OP, being in your presence is not the immense privilege you seem to think it is.
I agree completely. She is very obviously mortified but it would be harder to get over if the OP wasn't so mature in his reaction. He deserves the win and she deserves to feel comfortable ?
Well since he did message back at 7pm at least you know he's okay as of that time? Sounds like he needs some space, I'd talk about it when he's ready…
You were assaulted. I'm a massage therapist. This was assault. When you have a massage you can be easily taken advantage of. The way it effects your nervous system and relaxes you can actually make some people feel intoxicated. People will tell you things they wouldn't have said if they were not in this state. Plus the intimacy of the experience. We were specifically taught how easily people can be taken advantage of. She never had your consent to do this. The only Grey area is that unfortunately with massage and prostitution there is sometimes blurred lines because neither things is regulated properly in a lot of areas. So what should be called something like a sex parlor is called a massage parlor. They should have some sort of ways to prevent this thoigh like paper work or just asking… Especially because errections are not uncommon, again due to pitting the nervous system in a state of relaxation. Taking that as a sign of consent would be wrong. Unfortunately you may have just picked the wrong type of establishment. It's why my profession is fighting for better regulation. If you want to try massage again eventually, make sure they're registered locally or educated somewhere trustworthy. Words like therapeutic are usually good sign. But please get help for the assault first. And I hope your partner is understanding. Of course it makes sense she might feel upset…but hopefully she understands you weren't in total control. So unless uou specifically went there knowing what you were getting which it sounds like you did not… you did nothing wrong. Even the fact they only charged the first half up front is weird and sneaky, like they're purposely taking advantage of people. I'd go so far as to report the place if you feel up to it.
Why tell her you want paternity tests? Do it on your own privately.
Yeah, no. It my partner found out a friend of his was cheating, I would request for him to drop that friend. If he didn't? He obviously made his choice on who he would rather keep around.
OP is justifying the friend's cheating. And honestly? I wouldn't wanna be with someone like that
Is that “liking” cheating? He would never cheat or accept in his marriage but understands that his friend is flawed and accepts her
Yes ma’am you missed MY point. Bye!!
You can never unknow this, so if you want to feel secure in this relationship again, you need to bring this up with him and you need to hear from him why he feels he has changed. What he has done to change.
Also, all of this is assuming that up until now you were quite happy in this relationship. No excessive fighting, no verbal or physical abuse of any kind, and no signs of anger issues toward you or anyone in any situation.
Probably. But why do you care? He is your EX, so it’s over.
Do what you want, tell your boyfriend less. Do you tell him about every bowel movement you pass or every blood clot during your period? Of course not. There is minutiae that’s not worth sharing to keep the spark alive.
Dude, wtf, why are you so jealous of your partner having had a privileged background? You sound like you resent him sooo much because you feel he just has it way better than you. Get over yourself. There are tons of people out there that have it better than you. That’s life.
XBF thought he could bully me into allowing him to cheat – by telling me I'm rude to not want to share him with other girls
fixed your title for you.
RUN
and PLEASE – there is nothing for you two to talk about. he has made his intentions very clear, you have told him that what he said bothered you – he doesn't care about either.
I’m saying if you constantly keep bad company and use that to assume the entire world is the same then it’s your fault for being narrow minded. Only a moron would take personal interactions and extrapolate them to half the worlds population. Just because you’re a fucking moron doesn’t mean I think all women are morons, see how that works.
This is cheating. You should get an STD test for yourself. Did he meet up with anyone? I would want full transparency for why and how long has this been going on. Does he have porn or other sexting anywhere computer or phone? But the biggest question is why, when you were working through all of the other issues.
You should leave now with your daughter. Can't continue to check her phone and monitor her because that's not how to get someone sober. She needs consequences. Now.
You said it first. Hot to blame him for being honest if you started it.
Men if you agree with a woman she will get pissed, if you don't agree with a woman she will get pissed. Men can't win ? He didn't even make the statement, you did! Your the one that came out and said it. And if it's true (which is most likely because you think and said they are ) then why get that uoset? He apparently doesn't have a problem with it because he's with you and is even talking about growing old with you. It's natural for women's breast to become low especially after children it's not bad its just a part of life.
It’s true. Definitely working on it and aware that this wouldn’t be a problem if I wasn’t currently concerned about it !
Really? When we do the mulch bags, I dump and hand him the bag and after the bags are opened, then we spread it together. We just learned to work together and help each other.
Take this to your grave. Unless there's a chance he may accidentaĺly find out…..if not, then it's your past and can stay there.
Wtf who tf is he to tell you he’ll leave???
Oof, well said
You’ve offered a reasonable solution. Otherwise, this sounds like a him problem and not a you problem.
This is what I was thinking. Was she even pregnant?
First reason why she would never leave me has debilitating OCD and has expressed that if I left her she would fall apart… (I’m not taking advantage of that, I actually made her get therapy after she told me this) but second reason, she’s cheated on me twice and I’m Not even CHEATING!
No, I understood that's what you meant. Sorry I wasn't clear. I was just providing another example of how hormones can have a big impact on people.
1) Get into therapy.
2) He sucks.
Completely understandable. But I want to make a change
I don’t want him to think I’m trying to hot to get him to like me.
She’s not the brightest, is she? I avoid confrontation or escalation with less than bright people because it’s pointless. So I’d just say “thank you for your concern SIL, I’ll definitely think about it”. And if she ever comes back, you say “oh, yes! I thought about it. It’s between me and my lawyer now, thank you!”
Here's the thing: you don't both have to agree that what he did was cheating. What he did made you uncomfortable, and in your eyes was cheating. (And honestly, most everyone else is going to consider it cheating too.)
You are allowed to decide what you will and will not tolerate in your relationships. He lied to you and broke your trust, multiple times. He was ready to get with a random girl. And he's trying to distract you from being rightfully upset over his behavior by flipping it around and blaming your friend for tricking him.
If he doesn't think that's cheating, we'll, he's entitled to his opinion. But you don't have to stay with him or let him just sweep this under the rug because he says “oh, I didn't think that was cheating.”
Frankly, after reading some of your other posts, it sounds like you grew up in a not so great environment, being emotionally abused at the least. A lot of times, people who grow up in homes like that have what we call a “broken picker” – they don't learn how to recognize healthy, loving behavior as kids, so they are easy targets for abusers, cheaters, etc, as adults. None of that is your fault, but it does mean you would probably benefit from seeing a therapist.
Also, you have a baby girl. Think about what she's going to see, growing up with this guy as her dad. Do you want her to watch you and learn that she deserves to be cheated on?
Dude, she let you down easy.
knowing how he is treating my sister, I wish he chose someone else to cheat on me with
It think it may be backwards, unfortunately. A betrayal from some random romantic relationship is bad, but it's something almost everyone goes experiences in one form or other though life. A betrayal from a sibling, however, would hurt much more. Giving how willing your sister was of hurting you previously, and how easily she can blame you now, I think you are lucky she couldn't do something worse later on. Close family can do much more damage than a distant enemy.
If he's 30 and making minimum wage, he needs to do something to better himself. There's nothing wrong with making minimum wage, but a married father who's 30 has had plenty of time to acquire some kind of skill. He has no drive or ambition.
I'm going to be blunt and a bit rude. You don't need a marriage counselor. You need to grow a spine. He needs to know in no uncertain terms that the status quo is absolutely unacceptable. You need to stop enabling him.
Unfortunately, he's unlikely to change after 6 years.
Are you fine with it tho? If you feel some type of way about him when you can see what he is up to…imagine when you can't see what he is up to.
Honestly, There is nothing wrong with this situation, none of you are at fault here, you just now know that this person is not your ride or die kind of friend. She is not the one you can turn to for help in a bad situation but she is the friend you can go have superficial fun with.
You are older and wiser now and know just what kind of person she is, so treat her that way. hang out once in a while, grab a coffee or go to the movies, hang out and be lighthearted with her, but don't expect anything else from her then that cuz she proved to you her loyalties do not extend to your worst day.
And you know what they say, if you can't handle me at my worst you don't deserve me at my best so give her a version of you that is in between. There is also nothing wrong with saying “I was fine for the last 2 years without you, I am fine keeping it that way because I learned who I could rely on in my darkest days, and that wasn't you.”
Hi, not a troll post nor karma farming! ^ He is loyal to me however, and I know this for a fact. He does not speak to other girls or anything. This is why I feel bad. Thanks for your comment
looks like he's not the only one
Girl, you can't go complimenting people's penises and then posting this. I am not falling for some dumb troll. Check user comment history before feeling sympathy
Trust is earned, and he's destroyed that.
OK, a slightly different angle: you say you're ok with him going to strip clubs. So why do you think he lies about it? And what bothers you most about him lying?
Let him know you were drinking and made a stupid choice to text him that, which is exactly what happened from your post. From there, it would be up to him on whether he wanted to continue or not. But if you just block him, you’ll ruin any chance you have with him, and deny yourself any progress on changing your behavior.
Firstly, be careful of her she sounds like she has decided you are her meal ticket. I think a real conversation needs to be had about how you do not want to on-line above your meals of X a year. Explain to her that the 24 million is about being able to retire and stay comfortable for the rest of your life. And that it is YOUR money not HERS or OURS.
Second, you need a small reality check. If you really do have 24 million in the bank, you re rish. If you currently earn 200k a year. And to stay on that 'earning' for the rest of your life after 40 means you only need 12 million. You have double that so you are rich.
I'm not saying you have to spend it, and good on you for living frugal and not crazy. But you are rich.
Seek help
Also kids will pick up this behaviour and accept it as normal. She's not capable of giving a good example of conflict resolution currently, kids are not going to help that.
Talk some more about it. Tell him how much you love him but he also hurt you with the choice of words used. Try to meet at a common ground where some of these things can be resolved and y'all can go back to being sweet to one another again.
She should be concerned about the person who does not respect her privacy.
Lying through omission isn’t a great start. He’ll find out eventually. Past always catches up. You’ve played along into this. The best thing to do is tell the truth. He might be upset but imagine how upset he’d be if you and him run into one of your hook ups.
Oh, wow. Well, I'd just let her have him at this point, it's not worth another 12 years of misery tied to someone who can be so nasty towards you just to impress his little work wife. I find it ESPECIALLY disgusting that they're calling you qeak over symptoms of medication, for SEIZURES. That's not love. That's not worth salvaging. They deserve each other, and you deserve better.
I've had a situation where I genuinely loved someone. He was difficult as a person. I had a car accident and I couldn't come on a trip with him. He said: “I'll ask [random girl] instead.” All my feelings were gone that instant. I was in pain and his priority was getting even, because I let him down.
I called him up and told him I cheated, so he'd never call me back (didn't cheat). Best decision of my life.
He’s doing the right thing. He didn’t have a good relationship with them ever. Not if they would treat someone he cares about that way. The problem is not that they don’t respect you. It’s that they don’t even respect HIM.
Don’t leave him over this. Even if you did, the problem would still be there. They would still be racist to others and disrespectful and controlling to him.
Even if you left, he could not date anyone else they did not approve of.
I won’t say “you found a good one”, because I don’t know anything else about him. But I will say this is a huge green flag. Don’t feel guilty. You did nothing wrong. You are as valid and beautiful as every other human on the planet. You deserve respect. We all do.
I know still I’m going to tell you something my dad told me. No one who is sure about you will ever make you feel like they are unsure.
Disengage. Find someone who is sure about you. You deserve nothing less than what you give to other people. You’re giving her more than you get back. It’s a shitty deal. Why would ever allow yourself to accept less than you deserve?
I'd consider a private investigator.
I think when you get older you'll understand better.
Don't ask people on the internet, ask people she knows. Does she have a mum, a sister or a best friend that you can contact? Try them. And pay attention to the jewellery she already wears, try to go for something similar i.e. if she usually wears chunky gold, don't buy delicate silver, etc etc.
Either he is just a seriously hot thinker or he doesn't want to write back. There is nothing other than death or losing your phone where someone can't manage a simple text back after a few days.
i hate to say it but if he’s ok with treating you like that now, it’s not going to change. ripping you apart is more of a reflection on him than you. you deserve so much better!
Having emotions isn’t a bad thing, as long as you keep them in check (no tantrums, name calling, violence)
Sounds like he’s very low effort. Why are you in a one sided relationship?
why not come another day?
hopefully these responses illicit a long deep look into one’s own character. your assumptions are misogyny what did you expect her to say? or do?
why don’t you just tell us, from your own mouth, what did you want her to do/say?
Honestly she either sounds jealous or she just doesn't like you. She's picking fights for no reason.
womp womp womp.
another couple who waits for marriage in 2000s+ and now getting divorced.
Yes, she even threatened me to take legal actions a few hours ago. What the hell
If he made a move and she rejected him, she might’ve blocked his S/O to avoid further drama? I did that once, but in my case blocked them both because I didn’t want their straight toxic relationship drama spilling into my calm happy lesbian life.
If that’s the case though, it’s weird she would block the wife and not the husband.
Exactly! I’m not mad he’s getting it wrong. I am very particular, it’s upsetting he isn’t putting in the effort and is taking it personally
You are an incredibly intelligent woman, this is the one time running for the hills is warranted. Men who are insistent that their wives become fully financially dependent on them to this extent only want control. There are also studies about how men who earn less than their wives are more likely to cheat and feel insecure.
Yeah because we used to use newspaper there in the old days and it wouldn't flush.
So many red flags ?
Lack of consent is abuse. The whole “no means no” conversation is tacitly suggesting there is abuse.
But that isn’t what you used it for. You checked on him because he wasn’t where you thought he’d be.
So he's playing the whole turn it around to blame you game so that he can do what he wants in the future and you won't say shit in order to not upset him. He should be the one feeling shame for his actions. If he can't respect your boundaries, he's not worth much.
He likely was never a danger. Something extreme happened with the fiancé for the friend to cut contact like this. It’s super suspect that the fiancé isn’t saying what happened.
exactly! prenup saves even lives especially when it involves kids & if you ended up marrying a gold-digger/a jackass / a douche bag / abuser etc who doesn't deserve a dime of your money
a few months ago someone posted in Reddit she overheard her SO & his friends talking about her inheritance & they said he is lucky soon to be married to an ATM who is just a so-so looking. he agreed to the statement, to her looking so-so & never said anything about loving her. yikes! That OP dodged a HUGE MAJOR bullet & cancelled her wedding + a restraining order!
Thank you. This makes sense. As I say, I don't use Facebook much so don't really understand how it all works. What I forgot to mention is that our relationship is now not listen on her main page, you have to be a friend and go into the 'more info' section to find it.
I’ve had the surgery and it’s not even bad. You’re in and out in one day and sleep it off. You’ll get some pain meds and be okay within a few days. You’ll have 4 people with you, it’s not open heart surgery, you will be fine.
No matter what, I would recommend NEVER getting back with her based on this.
She's willing to do a scorched earth policy to protect this friend.
This friend has her wrapped around his finger.
Just walk away. You dodged a bullet that would be full of compromises.
Has her friend ever forced his way on a solo trip for just you two?
This is a blessing. ?and don’t think otherwise. It’s not about you at all. It’s all about his ability to control her and the kick he gets out of it. She will end relationship after relationship bc of him. When she’s older and still single and reflecting on prior relationships trying to figure out why things never work out she’s going to snap out of it and realize what has happened and how wrong she was.
The math ain't mathing
this is the answer
There is nothing confusing about this. She already knows who she wants to fuck and is probably already headed down that path, she just wants permission so that if it doesn't work out she can come back with a clean slate because “you guys were on a break”.
If it does work out with other dude, you will never see her again.
You really want to be with someone like that?
Like everyone else is saying: your gf has someone else in mind; she wants to give him a try; but she wants to keep you on the back burner.
There's nothing misogynistic about saying that you deserve better than to be someone's back-burner guy. Have some respect for yourself and move on.
If he's willing to send a dick pic, it's only logical that he'd be willing to send actual proof. Sounds more like he saw an opportunity to mess with OP and took it.
If he's willing to send a dick pic, it's only logical that he'd be willing to send actual proof. Sounds more like he saw an opportunity to mess with OP and took it.
They were/are married and have three kids together. About two years ago they separated, but at this point I don't know if they got back together or if they actually divorced. I never asked.
You comment really just brought me back to reality… I just reflected on what you just said and I can’t but agree… I just realized how many problem I have to work on… especially I especially have to work on my self esteem and my ability to set and respect boundaries. I already started wokring on my depression but my problem was that I only realized I that something was wrong with my behavior about a month ago… that is what I meant with things could have gone different… If I knew I would have started working earlier on my depression… I just realized how mich I have hurt her… but you are absolutely right that is my problem and not hers… that is on me I cannot blame anyone but myself for and I shouldn’t involve her with my mental issues
Buy her a weighted blanket. My wife hasn’t snuggled me since. I’m hot natured too but I kinda miss the snuggles sometimes ?
Don’t you just love husbands who tell their wives how it should be when they’re pregnant?
You are overthinking it. Don’t make a big deal about it. Just tell him your BFF invited him, you’d like him to go with you. It’s in August. Bf will probably think of it as a kind gesture.
Yes we've talked about waiting for a while actually. But it kinda makes me question because he told me we didn't have the money for Disney which I understood. And said we would get engaged/married sooner if we didn't spend that amount of money. Then about a month or two ago he said he wants us to go to Florida to visit a friend of his. Which has me confused and seems unfair
The version of here you had in your mind is not who she really is. Now that you know who she is, are you interested in being with her? If not, then now you can find someone worth being with.
ooighhheag aghhh ahhh i got sucked under my peloton ahhhhh oouhhhahh
There’s a commodity between the two and it’s a term I’ve seen in TikTok a lot. You may not like it, but OP isn’t pulling it out of nowhere and didn’t coin it.
Thank you, this helped a lot
It sounds to me like he's emotionally checked out, hence why he keeps saying you can leave if you don't like it.
Take the invitation. Leave him and find someone who will organise their priorities better and treat you with the respect you deserve. Things won't magically get better and it's a harsh reality to face but his actions are speaking volumes.
LMAO first i called someone a shithead, the second time i called someone “a b-word, as in brat, huge brat” or something like that
Why would you stay with someone who is saying such horrible things about you?
No, it's not forgivable. Absolutely not.
Obviously if he was saying these things about you, he's not a “very nice guy overall.” He's PRETENDING to be a very nice guy overall.
To me, this is unforgiveable. I'd rather be alone than spend time with someone who would talk about me like that. And forget being intimate. Why would you sleep with someone who hates you? Come on, do you hate yourself? No? So leave.
I totally have this feeling too. She did something she regrets and doesn’t want to admit or talk about it. And every time they discuss she’s retracted into some weird behavior she can’t explain. However, I know this sub loves to encourage people to break up and op is still young. But honestly, marriages are long and people change and shit happens, but if you love each other, talk about stuff, it’ll be solid in the long run. If you really love each other it is possible to be forgiving and develop a long relationship, but honesty and communication is critical.
Wow, the edit… it feels like you're going to reflect on the wrong things. Unless you're hanging out with absolute low lifes who are terrible people, and not just average or below in appearance, then your girlfriend is the actual shitty person.
Also noteworthy, most of your glowing review of her are things that she can't take credit for. Her family's wealth, being gorgeous, etc. are luck of the draw and not personally redeeming qualities. I was going to exclude “smart,” but if that's actually true it that isn't something she chose. And emotionally intelligent people don't base their worth on the attractiveness of their peers.
Yes. It's practically win win.
One can also observe a lot during dates or planning them. If she cancels because of weird excuses, isn't very attentive, isn't enthusiastic or isn't too passionate about it, there is lots to tell.
Then you can just ask why? Because something is definitely wrong.
The point is you tried, there won't be any regrets , it her all to blame, totally on her account and there won't be anything left for closure. It's plain absolution.
So yes, dating should never cease. Once a week bare minimum. Cheap or grand, doesn't matter. It's good time spent together.
It's important for partners to be able to communicate openly and feel heard in a relationship. It sounds like your boyfriend may have some underlying issues that need to be addressed, possibly through therapy. Encourage him to seek support, but also be patient and understanding. In the meantime, try to approach conversations with empathy and avoid making assumptions or accusations. Practice active listening and consider setting boundaries if his behavior becomes disrespectful or hurtful.
No, I have told him before that sometimes I feel like he’s with me only for sex…
This made me cry. ?
With the sentiment, not the exact wording is what I meant.
If you love someone unconditionally, it just sets yourself up for greater grief if they weren't actually worthy of it. Speaking from experience unfortunately.