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annabellastar chat
Date: September 27, 2022
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PleasingMyPussyNow
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At some point people have to be responsible for themselves. Yes people need help but eventually people stop helping if you keep doing the same shit over and over.
I commented on the actual situation elsewhere but reality is he could’ve made a million different choices that prioritized his safety over ego. Esp at his grown ass age of 40+
Not exactly the same thing but similar situations like yours get posted here with the genders reversed and the comments usually say dump them.
Considering your situation is a bit worse honestly yea probably dump them and move on. Sounds like it's beyond just porn and basically into cheating territory.
I'm not sad he didn't say it, I was saddened by his reaction to me saying it.
Let’s clear something up here. The relationship didn’t end over a three second phone call. The relation ended because you were so insecure over your relationship that one phone call to an unknown number sent you into a spiral of distrust.
Of course, maybe you’re insecure for good reasons – you don’t mention it, but for all I know, your now-ex may have cheated on you over the past two years.
Either way, own up what made the relationship go kablooey
She had the feeling that she was a better match for him than her friends if you can practice critical thinking while reading her post and responses. She can be fake to us just like she is to her friend but it’s obvious to everyone here.
totally understand — I went to a college where drinking was a thing every day after 5pm lol.
Her getting upset at you if you didnt spend a lot of time with her can be tackled with talking about
Do we want a scheduled date? Weekly date nights? or bi weekly? Talk about how in relationships, each of you are still independent people working on a relationship and you want to hang out with other people as well
You could go the other route too, full makeup and formal wear whenever you're at home, dressing up like you're going to the Oscars when you go out with his awful parents. There was a Reddit story a while back where someone's boss complained about the standards of dress and the employee complained about showed up on their next zoom call in a ball gown.
I mean when he’s not doing it. Tell him don’t do that ever again. I don’t like it. Stop doing it, it’s not funny
I guess it comes down to, when a guy has an engagement ring in his possession, and it's not for his current gf, then who is it for? That kind of thought probably is on her mind constantly.
But if you have your life in better order, you're at a job you like with the pay you think is good for getting married, and you haven't done it — then yea, something changed, because that was the goal post from 2 years ago.
if the goals have changed, or your feelings have changed, then perhaps it might be worth talking to her and see if she's willing to wait longer. If she's not, then it's her privilege to go ahead and end things.
The main thing I've learned about moving in together or getting married — don't just think the other person isn't thinking about it. So rather than avoiding the subject because you think things are going smoothly now, and therefor the subject doesn't need to come up because you have a little bit of worry or frustration about it, go ahead and bring it up and make sure you're both on the same page.
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It sounds like you need to get yourself a boyfriend to get your mind off of him.
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I think I saw a documentary about your hometown in high school health class.
Slightly kidding, but there definitely was a famous doc about a huge STI outbreak in a small town.
Really love this thankyou
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She fcked him and layed with you, nasty to say the least, I'm surprised that she didn't fck you after. She's a liar and and IMO I doubt it has stopped, I also bet that he laughed at you ALL the way to his car ,for you getting his sloppy seconds!! Reverse the situation and she would have dumped you right then and there. Just saying
He's already a liar and i dating someone half his age which is an excellent indicator he's a manipulator. Dollars to doughnuts he did not get babytrapped. Leabe him
Thank you so much for this.
Dude took a very hot gamble on that dick move as it's 100% sexual harassment.
Thank you! I really appreciate the advice!
Or just break up with her and date a normal adult woman.
Bro no, that’s simplistic. The cheater part, yeah, dude is definitely cheating or will in the near future, but my last relationship was a similar age gap (37 and 27) and I definitely never considered her a placeholder, did respect her and never would have cheated.
People absolutely claim to use tinder to make friends. I see it on plenty of profiles.
HOWEVER, it is an absolutely garbage way to make friends. Most people on there are on there to date. So trying to use a dating app to make friends (especially platonic friends) is coming at it from a perspective that most will not be taking. Doesn't mean your GF isn't being honest, but using Tinder for friends is just not effective (I will say I've met plenty of friends on tinder, but most of those friends are friends I've fucked or tried to fuck).
So, no using Tinder is not exactly the same as using Instagram. However, if she is using it because she likes to occasionally flirt and get re-affirmation on tinder, then a lot of people do absolutely use Instagram for that (and given the fact you have a non-trivial number of insta followers I wonder if you do that as well?).
Thanks for the advice!! I have decided that i'll let her go.
How is it his job to tell your friend off? If it was my wifes friend, I may say something to her, but not with my wife there. Your real issue is your “friend” set your boundaries with her.
Did anyone even consider “Johniams”? Maybe FiL would happier with that one?
Serious eye roll to him. He doesn't get to choose your life for you. Stick to your guns.
Lying, often and for no apparent reason, is concerning. Because when tf are you supposed to know what’s real…
Works in an office 8:30-4:30 No health issues He never says he is tired but when we watch a movie he always falls asleep lately. Works one job. He is far from overweight This is the first time he has gone MIA on a date night… I still haven’t heard from him
Because it’s a gym not a fucking singles bar! Despite what you think you might know, us women REALIY don’t go to gyms to meet dudes. It’s gross and it fucking ruins the experience. Thanks for being that guy
You're right to be concerned and there is definitely some line crossing on one of it not both their ends.
The hoody thing was telling. He was sending a message and it seems your gf is accepting it. This either needs to end now or it will grow into a much bigger problem. If you gf gets defensive and doesn't cut him out, I'd strongly recommend walking away from this situation. It won't end well. If you were doing this stuff with one of her friends, you best believe she'd have a problem with it.
Well the example I used to tell my friends is for her birthday, I flew us both out to venice for a 3 day trip, paid for everything. Anything she wanted she had that sort of thing. Took her out for drinks at night by the canals, walks through the parks, tried to give her her dream holiday type thing. But each night when we went to bed we'd get in cuddle up but if I tried to initiate anything “no not tonight, I'm tired” that sort of thing. Diddent do anything sexual that whole holiday. I asked her about it and it diddent even seem to bother her as she says she feels nothing down there.
I've never really been much of a romantic but have been trying allot recently to show how much I care for her, e.g. i work a job from 7am till 5.30pm every day and come back and cook food and try to do my fair bit around the house when I can eventhough shes home all day as she only works 4 nights a week.
You caught her in a “weird” situation, everyone around acted weird, she changed her mood for the whole weekend, she bought a plan B, she purposely lied to you about it, she doesn’t want to talk about it. I think you know what happened and probably what you should do, even if it hurts a lot or if she tries to gaslight you into thinking nothing happened. Even if she actually didn’t cheat (which I find extremely very hot to believe) she didn’t put a stop to this guy’s advances, which would have been the respectful thing to do if she was with you there, then lied blatantly and thinks you’re stupid. That alone is grounds breaking up. I would ask her, though, to come clean now you know Plan B does not for period cramps. Good luck.
I know people like that, but I don’t date them lol. People who know everybody’s statistics, other scores, people have way too much time on their hands. I like hockey, I go to hockey games every so often because I’m near an arena. But do I dress up like a hockey player every time? Do I decorate my car with hockey insignia? Do I really everything I do to hockey? No. There’s a difference.
I don't think it's a wise idea to get closer to a crush who you don't on pursuing romantically. I think you should broaden your circle outside of this individual.
Ffs- wake up. He’s trash, utter trash- and you’re worried about him not trusting you? You should be concerned that you are sleeping with someone who wound behave like this.
She has this sunday, monday and tuesday off. I told her earlier this week, I‘ll take a day off on monday so we can spend some time together. Today she tells me, that she‘ll go snowboarding the whole time.
And when you reminded her that the two of you had planned to spend Monday together, what did she say?
So she tested yesterday and 1/3 of the tests read positive but the other 2 were negative so I don’t know what to think at this point
If she’s not forgetting other things then her behaviour is suspicious.
There must be more to your relationship and story. A married woman doesn’t just forget after 3 months.
Probably either that or labia shape/size
You don't have to tell him. Get a lawyer and sort it out out from abroad. Do you really think there is a possibility of change at this point?
I don’t think so , I have my passport. He said I can leave if I want but then will be the end . Is more mental than physical
I want to say tell her. I would want to know. However, the fact that he is in law enforcement puts a completely different complexion on things. If there was a way to let her k ow and ensure your safety… but that probably wishful thinking. Even if he personally doesn’t retaliate against you, his buddies on the force might. Not worth the risk.
And I am not allowed to ask
Why would your brother book his wedding on your graduation day?! That's messed up! I think trying to attend both would be the best thing to do.
If you can't do that then you've got to weigh up how bad you'll feel not attending graduation vs how upset everyone is going to be with you for not attending the wedding (and how much you care about that!).
You could also try to sabotage their relationship so the wedding doesn't happen. Just be careful not to get found out!
As someone who missed their graduation due to covid, please go celebrate what you’ve worked very hot for!! You’ll be surrounded by classmates and faculty to celebrate with, even if your family chooses your brother. I honestly still feel sad not hearing my name called and that “oh shit im a doctor, i did it” moment, you shouldn’t miss it!
Grow a backbone and address it anyway
You do you, but I’m not sure why the age of your uncle’s girlfriend has any effect on you. They are both adults, let them on-line their lives. People just love being judgmental I guess.
Imagine having children with this guy. If you’re even considering that path, don’t do it. Even if he miraculously starts pitching in now, he will stop again when he thinks you’re trapped by a kid. You deserve waaay better…
The actual drinking here is the least of my concern, it’s the physical violence and repeated assaulting you because she thinks it’s “funny”. Most people, even when drunk, do not behave like that and it’s one massive red flag.
My advice would actually be to leave this relationship, personally.
The guy is tattling to your mom hoping to get you in trouble with her. I bet he was a classroom monitor in elementary school. If he can't handle your arguments like a grown up then he's not ready to be in a relationship.
also, i am complaining about MY financial stress about not being able to pay rent and bills and stuff, not complaining about not having things that i want. idk if that makes a difference in the situation but wanted to clarify.
You need to speak to an attorney and hire a third party accountant to handle books. Do not trust him or his AP. She’s using him.
Don't you think you're overreacting? there are some of us who think Mother's day is the day you celebrate your own mother and that's all. That the father will discreetly mention to the kids that it'll be mother's day on Sunday, and have they got a card at least, or take them out to get something if they're too young to do so themselves. I have never wished any other woman a happy mother's day and have never been wished a happy mother's day by anyone but my own kids. I'd be very embarrassed if anyone else were to wish me a happy mother's day, and I'd tell them that the only people whose verdict counts are my children, they are uniquely placed to know just how good a mother I have been and nobody else's judgement is of any importance to me.
Im so happy she escaped your cruel and abusive home. Leave her alone
I've come close to cutting off my dad, and by association, my mom, for nearly the exact reason's OP is alluding to. We're Eastern Europeans immigrants. I'm liberal. My dad is conservative. He needs to be right and he needs everyone to believe he's right. No respect for boundaries. Verbal, mental, and emotional abuse (though no actual physical violence). All that fun stuff.
I would've cut off anyone else for one tenth of the things he put me through “but this is my dad”. I still can't say if I would've been better off doing it even if things are much different now.
OP, your child likely valued you two more than any other people in the world for a long long time. Just imagine for one second how much hurt you must've caused him to override that. You won't since you didn't even finish the message but you really should.
I’m gunna go against the grain here. Everyone will tell you what to do and how to feel based on nothing but speculation. You’re an adult and with your own agency and can use it as you please. I’d do whatever I thought was more fun personally, you only on-line once.
Oh, my.
I dunno, did the guy pin you cause he was pissed off and you and wanted to fight? OP was angry and his gf and took it physical.
Exactly. My father is mixed and so am I, and the number of times she judged my natural hair or called my father “handsome for a black man” can't be disclosed enough.
You're not her priority! Move on and find someone who will cherish you. Good luck!
I stay over sometimes but me and my bf usually order takeout. His mom expects me to cook once in a while and on holidays for their family and extended family.
Did you not see the part where I mentioned she answered “yes” to the question whether she'd be interested in swinging?
I'm sure I'll get downvoted but…
She told me she didn’t read it like that, and that the story line is really good.
She actually used the “I read it for the articles” line, and you bought that? Google that if you don't get the reference.
If she wasn't using it to get off, what was the deal with her setting an alarm to masturbate after you leave every morning? I'm hoping there's an explanation that you left out of the update otherwise her excuses are downright pathetic and she just trying to get out of being caught using porn. And honestly, you are way, way too trusting if you actually believed any of that.
My honest guess (which I've seen happen before)? This erotica is the source of your dead bedroom. Finding a new form or genre of porn (or erotica) that is completely new to you and hits all your buttons and then some can be a lot like finding a new lover that rocks your world like nobody else has. It becomes almost addictive, and you can't get enough of it. I hope I'm wrong, but your update doesn't dissuade me from thinking that this is at least a possibility.
I don't doubt that there is a communication problem, a dead bedroom problem, and maybe and initiation problem, not for one second do I believe that she's found a loophole that allows her to use porn while you should be ashamed of using it.
Just to be clear, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you watching porn, there's nothing wrong with her reading porn, but there is something very wrong with your gf's need to control you using it while she uses it behind your back.
“The storyline is really good.” Massive face palm.
It seems like that’s a topic where your therapist can be helpful then. Take that into therapy and see if the therapist can get more specifics from her.
I am in counseling, I have been for nearly the last year. I am not perfect either and I’m sure there’s more context I could add but it does all boil down to if he is willing to make this work or not. It’s very hot to convey everything on this forum. But I tried to sum it up as best as I could. I don’t have a huge support system and I’m reaching the end of my rope with things, I guess I was using this as a sounding board because I am staring to internalize it and I really can’t do that to myself. I have all good intentions here.
Looks, I think the nail painting thing is a bit of a distraction from the main point (obviously it's not ok to repeatedly ask someone to make changes to their self presentation when they're said no, obviously it's offensive to ask someone to make a change to presentation that is a bit 'porn star' but like, I wouldn't expect the average man to know that out there nail polish colours (with exceptions when making a fashion statement) are naff).
But that's kind of irrelevant in the face of you haven't had sex for your entire marriage and your wife doesn't like spending time with you. This isn't a you problem.
Ok….none of this is based on reality tbh. There’s no reason for you to worry
She’s incredibly immature and struggles with communication. On top of that, she’s letting her friends decide how to on-line her life? Sounds like divorce is the best plan, especially considering she’s already seeing other guys.
Love won't pay your bills as it doesn't matter how much you love him. If he's not willing to work very hot to make money and earn a living then what's the point? What about you as well? Are you also trying to get a job as well? If both of you aren't doing your part to earning a good living and have financial security for the future, then I'm sorry, y'all are living in Fantasyland.
You know the answer, he’s lying and cheating and he will not tell the truth unless he’s back into a corner, call his bluff and tell the wife of the friend. If you guys are friends you should tell her anyway