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⚠, ️Spread and rub my asshole⚠️|♥Lets bounce my big ass with your tips papi ♥PVT OPEN ♥ CONTROL ME [Multi Goal]
Date: September 25, 2022
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Yeah because that would infer that she knew your age in order to make reference to “im younger by this much”
You hung up a picture of yourself nude. You now have to online with the fact people see it.
Take the love languages quiz together. It will help you tell each other how you want to receive affection and love. If he doesn't change his behavior, he's probably just not the right guy for you.
I really hate this take people have bills yes it sucks that he isn’t home and I feel for her but at the end of the day it’s not like he’s out fucking around he’s working
I’m giving my sister money because she’s hosting at hers, she’s 8.5 months pregnant with baby number 2 so also can’t travel! I didn’t ask him to contribute (I didn’t think to tbh), I just didn’t want her to struggle as she and her partner both work In hospitality which isn’t the best paid.
When he invited me I didn’t really think there would be such a big price tag.
Lady are you high?
This guy has been raw dogging strippers for years and you're still bumping uglies with him. I'd suggest an STD test and a new life. You're a doormat.
Where in the Republic of Ireland are you from may I ask?
Can your girlfriend come with?
His conditions?
I'm not trying to be condescending or to judge you, but honestly, why does that matter to you? Why does it have to be a diamond ring? Why there has to be a ring at all?
I don't think you're a terrible person for feeling this way, just that you might have some shallow expectations. I can't lie, I'm frowning as I type this. But yeah, try to understand why you care so much about such a shallow, materialistic thing. Aren't you happy the love of your life proposed to you? Once people are married, don't they get like a plain band or whatever? So why are you so concerned with temporary jewelry? Aren't sapphires just as durable as diamonds? If you think it's a pretty ring, why do you care if it's a diamond or not?
IDK OP, I don't think you should bring it up. I will make you look like a spoiled materialistic ungrateful high maintenance brat. I'm not saying you are, just that in this particular scenery that's what you'd make yourself look like.
My boyfriend told me that he thinks men are, on average, smarter than women, and I’m not sure how to react.
He works in one of the STEM fields? He should acknowledge the value of peer-reviewed work. From Leta Hollingworth's (1914) paper onward: Halpern, Benbow et al (2007); Machin & Pekkarinen (2008); Hyde (2014); etc…
all constitute deep consensus that the average IQ of men and women is the same, but that the distribution curve for men is significantly flatter, meaning that most women have IQ scores closer to the average, whereas men's IQ scores are scattered.
What that suggests, roughly speaking, is the lowest-IQ individuals in the world would likely be mostly-male, but the highest-IQ individuals would also likely be mostly-male. This obviously does not preclude the very smartest individual being female. The same goes for the very dumbest.
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This is a quote from you:
Then said he's not looking for anything romantic
So if you DO want something romantic, you need to end things with him. Also, he is in a relationship, I don't care if it's dead, that right there is enough reason to end this. Don't settle for anything less than someone that can fully commit to you.
Ohhhhh okay. That last part was what I was talking about, I didn’t know you could sue in that situation.
I really don't know. It's not a dealbreaker if he isn't addicted and smokes all day for me. And I really love him and i really don't want to break up. I don't want to lose him
I agree. Based on his actions throughout all this you’re right that he doesn’t care about feelings so long as he gets what he wants. (No condom bc it probably feels better to him) and the fact that he seems super amused and happy by my obvious discomfort makes me think he enjoys that too.
Never! At any moment you could break up with your boyfriend and then you have to break up with his friends too. My guy knows all of my friends, and has a few numbers ICE, but unless something serious has happened they rarely communicate.
Also please stop tagging along to all of their events that's a red flag for any group of friends.
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? same thing every time pretty much, either will tell me directly to take my clothes off or he’ll feel me up/kiss me before asking me to take my clothes off… and of course pull me on top of him and make me feel his boner ? so romantic
that man is so cringe
Maybe first allow yourself to know that you don't have to “accept it”. These conditions are such that most people wouldn't agree to just online with it. Your boyfriend is young and most likely reality will dawn on him at some point. But if this is his stated goal right now there's no reason you have to stick around to find out if this is really how he's going to on-line his life.
He said he really said that but not wanting to offend her. According to him, she gets lonely a lot so he tried to befriend her, but in his own way. When we first met he made fun of me but he didn't mean to offend me and we ended up becoming friends so I know it's true.
his uncle has been dead for a while before it was posted. i am concerned it means something more. there are pictures/tags of both exes on his social media but this one is like a banner display and it feels like a call to her or something
You made the right decision. He’s trying to invalidate what happened and convince you it’s not too bad but he was testing boundaries and it won’t get better from here. You should never be afraid of your partner and I’m sorry you’re going through this. You know what happened and you are taking the right steps. Be safe
OP is not a licensed therapist and is not equipped to handle a future trauma response from her boyfriend.
It feels like being in a relationship with a child more than anything else.
Yes but you're putting up with him and trying to “fix him” and change him. No adult woman of his age would be naive enough to do that. That's why he's with you.
You know this isn’t about him truly thinking his “method” is correct, right?! It’s about control and dominance. He wants you and your family to experience, suffer from, and show deference and submission to his giant shits. That’s why he doesn’t want you to solve the problem. It would lessen his “impact”.
I’ve got a similar story. Not nearly as disgusting, but the same component is definitely there, so maybe it will make it more clear for you. I’ve long since booted this person out of my life, BTW…
So I like to have the kitchen clean before I go to bed so when I start my day I can walk into a clean kitchen and make a cup of coffee before I get in the shower. It’s important to me. It sets the tone for how my whole day starts. It’s the same reason I make my bed every day, so when I arrive back to it in the evening, things feel like they’re not in disarray. (And oddly enough, he worked nude to undermined that, too.)
So the kitchen…he would drink beer at night, and ABSOLUTELY REFUSE to dispose of the cans as he emptied them. Instead he would stack them on the counter by the back door. There was a trash can in both the kitchen and a the larger one was like three steps outside the back door. But he stacked them anyway, every night, and eventually dispose of them the next day…but well after my opportunity to experience waking up to a clean kitchen had passed. Usually after I’d left for work.
For years I asked him to throw them away as he emptied them. It oscillated between joking exchanges to outright pissy responses, but it never changed. I had been refusing to throw them away or walk them out to the can because I wasn’t going to clean this up for him. He needed to do it, right? Turns out there was more to it than laziness.
See, he WANTED to fuck up my mornings. It was the whole purpose. He knew what I wanted, what was important to me in my living environment. So what was important to him was that I NOT get it. That I be forced to regard and online in deference to his massive, trashy pile.
This became clear when one night before bed, as I was cleaning the kitchen, I asked him yet again to “please get these cans before you go to bed”. I got yet another pissy, passive aggressive response. So I opened the back door and started carting the empties myself to the can myself. And he lost his mind. He jumped up, enraged, went to the outside can, DUG THE EMPTIES BACK OUT, and restacked them on the counter! Screaming at me the whole time.
That was when it became clear what was actually happening here. And also happening with the sabotaging of my bed-making, as well as a couple of other simple tasks.
It wasn’t about his methods or habits being superior, or justified, or his laziness, or his stubborn unwillingness to do anything differently that might solve it, or just bad habits. It was 100% about MAKING me suffer in small, passive aggressive ways. To make me “take it” from him, and deal, to submit to a less-pleasant living environment and ultimately to keep me mildly upset in very small but accumulative ways.
And I’m certain that’s what’s going on in your situation, too. Your much, much nastier situation. But the motivation is the same.
He'll never get over it. Just break up with him. Either tell him why or don't, but do not lie about why; don't blame it entirely on his infidelity without telling him about yours, that would be shitty.
avoid her at work, stop inviting her over, stop calling her, block her number, stop TAKING YOUR MONEY OUT and buying her stuff.
You are 29 years old. You can control yourself.
Yah you dun goofed OP sorry.
The only thing you can do is apologize and offer reassurance and hope he can move past it. You agpiding the conversation isn't helping and in fact, may actually be making the situation worse.
You're ignorant. I know plenty of women who got pregnant after 35 and with zero complications and all the children are perfectly healthy. I'm so tired of people thinking that reading shit online means it's absolutely true. Go talk to a doctor or an actual expert, don't just read some random crap on-line and think it's gospel.
Your girlfriend deserves better than you.
If he accepts and loves you as you are, I don't think you are putting a strain on anything but yourself in the end 🙂
He deserves to be happy. But what if he's happy with you?
Does he try to give you affirmations and comfort you when you feel insecure like this? Is he always patient and caring?
How is the communication between you two?
Just because you have trauma and issues ongoing, doesn't mean your relationship is unhealthy or doomed to fail.
maybe he doesn't want some jaded 30 year old.
i'm older and staying single but i wouldn't date any of the women my age that i know. most have multiple baby dads and are a walking train wreck.
Thank you! This is great advice.
Are you just looking for a reason to be upset because I’ve changed my mind and accepted that I overreacted & you’re still upset
I really need to further educate myself about all of this and appreciate your reply, thanks!
Sounds like you’re just being an asshole. She comes to you about something she’s validly upset about, and you ignore her and don’t acknowledge her words, and then proceed to call her over-emotional online.
You don’t need to ‘fix her daddy issues’, you just need to acknowledge that s he’s upset, say you’re sorry she’s upset and ask if there’s anything you can do, and give her a bloody hug. It’s not nude.
It sounds like her dad is a royal ass, so getting upset over getting 50% on a test is totally understandable, the fact that you didn’t offer any encouragement is actually sad.
To summarise, you’re a shitty boyfriend and she deserves way better.
Emotional neglect isn’t okay just because you’re ‘not emotional’. You don’t need to be emotional to not act like a dickhead.
Yes. Block him first then tell her
U aren’t ruining anything. He did that
I just know that that love can’t go away, I just hope he will be affectionate with both of us again.
Nah man, that was half of it, but it was more like “don't be a dick to me at the wedding, which I feel like I have to ask because you've historically been a major dick to me”.
The same message could be phrased way better if OP was actually interested in smoothing things out.
It's ok…just tell her the truth. I have lied about my age so much I forgot how old I really am. Other than that I'm a very honest person.
Definition of mental gymnastics “Mental gymnastics refers to the mental work one must do to justify a belief they hold, often times it's a very absurd belief that's held despite evidence to the contrary. “
Example of a belief one may have to perform mental gymnastics with: “For example: a person in a relationship is not allowed to withdraw consent.
Certain beliefs need more mental gymnastics, others less: “The mental gymnastics required in order to assert this belief and stand behind it are insane.”
Bringing it back to this post and how my comment relates to it, this is also an advice sub, so something I say should contribute to the issue at hand: “This seems to be the belief the husband holds,”
My reasoning for why the husband may have an issue with consent: “based on his reaction, and giving her the cold shoulder and ignoring her is his attempt to persuade her that she's in the wrong.”
My reasoning for why OP is not in the wrong, and her husband is in the wrong: “In reality, anyone may withdraw their consent at any time.”
In the cult I was a member of, marital sexual assault is an issue. In fact, in the cult I was a member of, having sexually charged conversations with underaged children one-on-one with adults is also an issue. I speak about these issues openly because I know it's not something that everyone understands, something you seem to suggest (that it's an obvious fact that everyone is aware of) in a previous comment where you call me sheltered or naive, by asking if I had learned this fact yesterday: “A partner no longer wants to have sex? Then they can withdraw their consent. At that point, the sex has to stop or it becomes sexual assault.”
To underscore my point for those who may not understand what I'm stating: “And yes, even married people can be sexually assaulted by their spouse.”
Had I wanted to “paint them with the same brush”, “conflate them, or “liken them”, I'd have been much more direct. But as that wasn't the point of my comment, something you don't seem to understand, I did not. OP doesn't seem to have an issue communicating her needs, she agreed to his suggestion of an OM after pushing and suggesting the issue multiple times, she even encourages him to go out that night and have fun. She does this with the understanding it's an agreement on a trial basis, either may rescind their consent. In the morning, she realises how she actually feels about an OM when she sees her spouse has signed up for a dating app/site, at which point she communicates with him that she no longer consents to an OM. Her husband pouts and gives her the cold shoulder. Husband doesn't seem to have also understood it was on a trial basis and that she would be able to change her mind. Husband doesn't understand the open communication and honesty required to have a successful OM. I did not suggest that her husband would, or had sexually assault her; I did not say that husband wanted to cheat on her, or already had cheated on her.
I've clarified my comment multiple times, and you seem intent on either willfully ignoring my clarifications, or insisting I meant something with my comment which I didn't. You're allowed to do this. You're allowed to have your opinions, as outlined in the Psychology Today article you sent me. You're also allowed to be willfully ignorant of my clarifications and even ignore them. This, however, ignores the basic understanding of a dialog. There is no back-and-forth here, there is no reaching a greater understanding or appreciation for other's opinions and viewpoints. You appear to be willfully obtuse. And for someone complaining that I've spent a lot of time on this, and that I have a problem setting boundaries, you seem to be suffer from that which you accuse me of suffering, seeing as how you've been stewing on this now for almost a full 24 hours.
Based on your comment history, we don't agree on many things. I disagree with many of your (apparently) held beliefs and opinions. And while I've tried to be considerate and thoughtful with my responses, not knowing your mental capacity or background, you've been accusative, brash, borderline rude, and also just straight-up rude to me, while not respecting what events may have occurred in my past (suggesting I “try both”, meaning being cheated on being sexually assaulted, so I could “learn they're not the same”). What I imply with my comment, and what you infer, are not the same. I hope you learn the difference between those two (imply vs. infer), as it's a significant difference that may help you to understand people in the future. But based on this interaction, understanding doesn't seem to be your goal. I wish you more success in understanding people in the future, internet stranger.
Whats the big deal with the shift and why it is so good, is it because the timings are really good or the job is easier?
How do I be honest when saying that this is hurting me is taken by her as a personal attack? I felt like I expressed multiple times how much I was hurting and that I needed her support, and once I hit my breaking point and asserted a boundary she just hung up on me.
I get not being able to relate to something like this, when my father passed away about a decade ago I felt like many of my friends did not understand what I was feeling. They didn't start fights with me…
Pool your finances on a live-in nanny with a master's in early childhood development and a daily housekeeping service + chef. She keeps her career progression/retirement savings, she doesn't waste her education and qualifications, you don't start to resent each other, there is no disparity in the marriage partnership, and the house and baby are cared for by experts in the field
The only way he should address this is to apologize to you and your roommate for making you uncomfortable and telling you that he understands the way in which he tried to comfort your roommate was not okay with you (or your roommate) and he won't do it again. Anything else is trying to excuse his behavior so he can (likely) do it again. You've only been dating a month, he should still be in best behavior mode around your friends. This is not your insecurities, this is your gut telling you something is off. Don't dismiss your gut.
Pro millionaire tip – never put it all in one account.
It can't be that amazing if youre lying about talking to your ex and he's trying to cheat on you and you both scream at each you wish each other were dead.
Love is the easiest part of a relationship. People love shitty, toxic people all the time. Doesn't mean that relationship is good for you, doesnt mean you two are good for each other. Love doesn't mean a relationship is a fulfilling and healthy addition to your life.
Gender roles from which decade!?! The 40-60’s??? You want to do gender roles but then you say you’ll resent your role? Sounds confusing
You missed the important part. Read it again.
Have you considered offering to pay for her to have tubes tied/an IUD after this one?
I think attempting to “fix family” is more often a loosing cause than a winning one. Unfortunately. I really struggled to accept this for the longest time. Now I have 3 state separating us. Distance has advantages.
If you want the chance that the relationship can get over this then you tell her that she has one opportunity to protest there was nothing inappropriate, and that the lying was the only thing she did wrong.
The opportunity is that she calls in front of you right now each person separately, asking them to say in their own words what happened that night.
Tell her that if any story sounds fishy, or if the stories do not match up, that the relationship is over.
If she declines to prove herself then the relationship is over.
Lying is something that you can forgive once they come clean, but anything else is game over.
But in all likelihood she fucked someone that night, and probably has cheated on you multiple times during your 14 years together, so better to end it, tell everyone that it is because she cheated on you (and I do mean everyone – all her family, all mutual friends, any work colleagues of hers that you even know just in passing – cheaters do not deserve the ability to hide from their actions)
They all three got clean bills of health by the Veterinarian just recently. So this behavior is not because of health/age issues.
This is a husband issue. The husband is letting them be Alpha, when HE'S supposed to be Alpha in that household! The dogs aren't the problem. He is. Her anger and hatred for the dogs is misplaced. It should lie solely with him for not doing what he's supposed to as a dog owner/parent, period. But, he refuses to accept any accountability.
And no one should be telling OP to toss the dogs out, or, “wait until they die”(which I've seen more than once, and is just absolutely heinous)!!
If anyone gets tossed out, it should be him! And the dogs should be taken in by dog parents/owners who know how to, and actually will, care for all of the dogs properly! Because this ain't it!
It's time for divorce.
There’s no dead bedroom on his end. He stays out drunk and missing. He is definitely a rolling stone. There’s more misery than life with an alcoholic.
Good luck bro, and congratulations!
First thing I would do is get tested you can worry about everything elsse after but getting tested is most inportant. Afterwards next step should be to leave that sorry SOB
OP my bestfriend fell into this too he had a good heart and like u wanted to be a good guy. Bt u arent responsible for her and unfortunately u cant stay for her kid. She's a mother. She's rushed the relationship to get a babysitter who is also an ATM to provide while she fucked around. Don't let yourself get abused and guilted. She's done nothing to prove to u She's trustworthy or actually cares about u.
U deserve better
There is nothing you can say to make this vile man understand. You must protect yourself and end this relationship, as you are in danger.
Normal relationships aren’t like this. You deserve a partner who’s kind and supportive, especially when you’re dealing with so much.
I respect anyones opinion and you can't change that, even, I shouldn't change her opinion
Scientific facts are not a matter of opinion. I hate that we've gotten to the point where people feel they can have an alternative opinion on whether or not science is real.
Your girlfriend has a MISAPPREHENSION about medicine. She has WRONG information that she believes. She does not have a DIFFERENT OPINION because you cannot have an opinion on scientific facts.
I would leave. You can't talk someone into basic critical thinking.