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  1. I think in principle it shouldn’t matter, but in practice, many positive qualities are correlated with attending and finishing school, such as organization, responsibility, financial stability, and perseverance. It’s not a deal breaker, but it’s certainly a green flag.

  2. Eh, the worst that can happen is there's no connection and one of you moves out. Sounds like she already has feelings, so what's one dinner date going to hurt? If it's too weird for you then thats that, but sounds like you've considered dating her, so why not give it a chance?

  3. Every single thing she said and did already was completely out of line. Wonder how your mother would feel about that.

    If you're smart you'll stop, turn around, and walk away next time this lady is around.

  4. Yes, stop trying to shut down a point yiou disagree with using rhetorical tools that add very little to the discourse at this point.

  5. Dump his ass … NOW Block his number on your phone. Don’t answer calls from unknown numbers… only those in your Contacts. Goddess, don’t dip below the water line – Cherish yourself

  6. Please stick with this mindset, even when you feel lonely. If he's already choking you 8 months into a weekend relationship (without even seeing you all the time/living with you) I can't imagine how he would treat you if you kept a pregnancy he didn't want.

  7. You need to wait the week out and respect her wishes. Sounds like you communicate well and your rules are not those they signal the end of things . She just needs some time out . Trust her and give her some room to breath .

  8. Doubt she's gonna do that. I mean, the bf didnt spend his life around his younger brother and obv dosen't realize any patterns he might add around girls he likes…. /s Maybe OP likes the brother's attention, that's also a possibility but this is already conjecture so idk

  9. yes I just had exactly this happen. I had chlamydia back in 2019, was treated for it. somehow tested positive for it this year and my partner tested negative. I never had any symptoms so it was strange

  10. Ok I'm a father and have 2 kids so i feel completely justified in saying your husband is an immature, insensitive, asshole. I'm not saying that as an insult to him just an observation of his personality. You just pushed a human out of your body after carrying it for the better part of a year and his main concern with your recovery is when you can “bone” him again? Are you fucking kidding me?

    To be pestering you over sex right now is literally the last thing that should be on his mind. I had to recheck the story to make sure this wasn't a teen pregnancy story because that's the only way I could justify that level of immaturity. You're going to have to stop with giving him the benifit of the doubt because some of his other things might be ignorance but this is not.

    I keep picturing you taking care of all the baby duties and him sitting in a chair in front of a TV with a remote or console controller in his hand complaining that the baby is crying or that he's hungry. Sorry your post just made me angry and I'm directing it at him. You need to call him out on this and if it keeps up call him out infront of other people, preferably the dr. I would say “how often do you get immature questions like this?” Or “is it common for the father to only be concerned with the mothers recovery because he's just horney?”

    He needs some shame in his life because it doesn't seem to come natural to him. I would suggest you get some counseling together and I imagine him taking some parenting classes wouldn't hurt either. If it were me I wouldn't have sex with him again until 3 weeks after they say it's ok….if at all and please use protection, because this isn't the kind of guy you're going to want to have more than one toddler running around with. Good luck OP and stop letting his stupidity go, call it out. He should be rubbing your feet and doing as much as possible to allow you to sit and recover.

  11. Second this. My gf and I are the same and by all measures and views we have as happy and as beautiful a relationship as possible. We are both tremendously lucky to have each other. Sometimes having opposing view points forces you to examine yourself and what you believe. A relationship without growth is as toxic as non-moving water. Bacteria and scum form on that. But running water stays clean and feeds life.

    Politics is a very derisive and diving game. Politicians only benefit when you are angry. How many people vote because they love a candidate vs HATE the other side. That’s bad vibes to on-line life with that anger.

  12. You're lucky you have a kid together. Otherwise, he probably wouldn't think twice about divorcing you.

    He might even be thinking about doing so anyway. And rightfully so. Most men don't relish living with someone who does deranged things such as this, child or no. And this action could also be used to show that the child would possibly be in danger if left with you, so he could get custody.

    You REALLY didn't think out your actions, did you?!?!?

  13. Big guys are often scared of repercussions, not the actual fight. Maybe they don’t want to use their size and accidentally really hurt someone, or maybe don’t want the law to look at them as aggressive. But also being big does not give one a fighting spirit, or any fighting ability.

    I’m six foot tall and athletic, but pretty thin. My athleticism isn’t really muscular strength. But the few times I’ve seen men bullying women, I’m there before I’ve really thought about what I can actually do if it turns into a fight. I’m not a fighter and would probably lose to someone even smaller than me. But I’d take that over someone more vulnerable losing to them. It just wouldn’t seem right.

    More often than not there is strength in numbers, so making sure you add your voice in opposition to him, and defense of her means others might see and join. But your friend is right that you may find yourself in jeopardy if you do this much more. You just have to think if it’s worth it.

    For me it is

  14. So because you’re both being being stubborn you aren’t spending time together that you wanted to with him off doing his own thing and you posting on Reddit about it?

    I’m rolling my eyes so far back I can see my brain.

    What if you chose two things and gave him the choice of one of them? That way you’re both choosing. If he doesn’t go for that, tell him you’re choosing to make out on the couch.

  15. That's because she wants her ex and he only wants the sex

    Just stay broken up , she doesn't want to be with you , its time to accept reality

    Maybe ask her details about their sex life and then everytime she rebounds back into your life you can relive that.

  16. Dude. Grow a spine! She's most likely fucking someone else/multiple others.

    Stand up for yourself! She does NOT love you! Don't be a fucking doormat.

  17. This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below.

    For some context, my boyfriend(28M) and I(27F) met when we where in college. My family is very conservative and, while they've never been rude to him, they've made comments that make it clear they don't love him. He's always had a lot of tattoos, piercings, long hair and I love that about him because we are opposites. Anyway, right after college we moved in together and got jobs, he became a freelancer and I started working for a big company, which made me the breadwinner. This is a role that neither he or I mind but my family and friends have always criticized.

    Recently I had a serious conversation with my bf and asked him wether he had any plans of proposing after we've been living together for 6+ years. He said he honestly didn't, that he doesn't feel the need to get married since we aren't religious and don't want to have kids. I told him that after growing up with my cousins and sisters' weddings, I've always had the illusion of getting married one day. He then told me that he would only marry me with one condition: I have to pay for the whole wedding (except his tux and his family's dinners), it can be however I want and I get the final say for everything, but it goes all out of my pocket.

    I told him it was fine and that I understood, I was very happy after hearing that because my bf never wanted to settle and this seemed like huge progress for me, so I decided to share the news with one of my sisters. When I told her she got mad and started making a lot of comments about how I've basically “mantained” him these years and that the least he can do is pay for half of the wedding. I tried to explain that that's not the way things are but we got angry and hung up.

    Days later I met my family only to be received with some sort of intervention of them telling me that we couldn't get married like that, that he needs to “man up” and start providing for us and that I'm just being used. Honestly I didn't care about their conservative arguments until my mother (the most liberal person in my family) told me that marriages are based on collaboration and if he doesn't want to get married or support with the wedding that I should consider things thorougly. While that kind of hit me I asked her if she would say the same if our genders where reversed and she stayed silent. Any advice?

    TLDR: My bf will only marry me if I pay for the whole wedding and while I don't mind my family doesn't approve.

    Edit: I've been informed that the phrase “settle down” has a different meaning to the one I originally intended. I apologize, english is not my first language and I thought it as a synonym to making it “official” by getting married.

  18. I only pay rent if he is unable to pay the whole amount, which has happened quite a few times since living together

  19. I only pay rent if he is unable to pay the whole amount, which has happened quite a few times since living together

  20. Sounds like you're an extrovert and your bf is more introverted and has a lower social battery than you.

  21. There is no chance than any legitimate therapist would tell OP she should jump from a bad marriage immediately into a relationship with a guy she just met.

  22. I think what hurts is that I understand his side too, I just don't want to face it.

    I really needed this message. I didn't think to look at it from a timing perspective. We've been having cases of poor timing since we were 11 years old and it's like we can never get it right!

    But thank you. You're right; He has reassured me that he has thought ahead and that he still wants me to be apart of this chapter of his life even if it's not ideal. He says he doesn't want it to be like this but it's just the way things have turned out and there is a way around it if ever the time comes where we are strong enough to be living together. I will do what I can to be adaptive, I guess I just hate change!

  23. Tell her how you feel and maybe she feels the same way and talk to a doctor about her having a healthy pregnancy and healthy baby. Please communicate with one another.

  24. She wasn't looking for a ride home.

    She was looking for a hookup. And found one.

    And then a few weeks later, went out again looking for another one.

  25. You hear people say there are women ok with their husbands spending hundreds of dollars on hot women while their wives are at home with newborns, but I've remarkably never met a single one…let him explain it to his divorce lawyer.

  26. I mean, I'd say definitely see a therapist.

    She was honest with you and it sucked to hear, no one likes to hear that stuff, but if you're gonna grow to resent her over it you should probably take a breath and get some help processing your thoughts and emotions.

  27. You don't get to police what he watches. You do get to decide to break up if this is a dealbreaker for you.

  28. If you cannot trust him, it doesn't matter if it's now all in your head. If you cannot say with 100% certainty he's being faithful, it's not a good relationship to remain in. Sometimes once trust is broken this severely, you can't get it back.

  29. Maybe not. But that's a contact the mother doesn't trust, so off she goes and that's all.

  30. It’s still not his place to tell you how to dress. Soon he’ll tell you who you can be friends with, where you’re “allowed” to go, which family members you can’t speak to anymore, etc. This is the beginning of a controlling and abusive relationship and you need to get out before you lose even more of yourself.

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